Living In Sin
by TheCaneOfBates
Summary: What if John's reaction was the opposite when Anna admitted, 'I'd live in sin with you.'
1. Chapter 1

**A/N -_Out Of My Leagu_e is coming to an end now. I've decided to finish it sooner than I had first anticipated, purely because I believe the only thing left for John and Anna now they are married is to start a family. There will be a honeymoon chapter, and probably an Epilogue but then I will bring it to a close. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed, checking my phone on lunch breaks to see new reviews and follows really brightened my day, especially with my Mum being ill as well. Writing OOML was a nice escape. Cheers :) **

**I want to get back to writing Anna and Bates in their proper setting, and the idea for my new story was suggested to me, by of all people, my partner. He says he only sits to watch Downton to humour me, but I know he's into it. We watched from the beginning, and when we got to the scene where John is telling Anna he's leaving in S2, E1 he said, and I quote, 'you should write a story where Bates takes Anna up on her offer of living in sin.' After I'd got over the initial shock of him actually taking an interest in something other than football and his blasted motorbike, I thought what a good idea. **

**So this is a taster of what will be my new multi chapter story. I haven't actually planned it past the 1st chapter yet, too busy with OOML so any suggestions be it through PM or a review are gratefully received. **

* * *

_'I don't care what people say,' Anna insisted. 'I'd live in sin with you.'_

John looked deep into Anna's eyes as he played over those six words in his mind. She was crying. He had been pleading with Anna to let him go. It would be better for her to find someone more suitable, someone more deserving of her love. But Anna's admission, the desperation in her voice, stirred something within John.

Before he could stop himself, his mouth was covering Anna's, their kiss more abrasive than those they had shared before. John's cane lay abandoned on the floor as he motioned Anna towards the crates behind her. Sensations were flowing through Anna's body that she had never experienced before. The nature of the kiss she was sharing with the man she loved born out of yearning rather than affirmation of their love. Reaching under his jacket, she rested her hands on the smooth fabric at the back of his waistcoat.

'Anna,' John said weakly, reluctantly pulling away before resting his forehead against Anna's. His breathing was heavy, his eyes half lidded and Anna almost groaned aloud as she felt his desire pressed against her stomach.

'Please don't leave me.' Anna whispered. 'Please.'

John sighed, tears falling down his cheek to mirror Anna's.

'Alright.' John relented.

'What?' Anna gasped, backing away so she could look into John's face.

'I thought I could go with her,' John replied. 'But I can't. I need you.'

'I need you too.'

'We have some decisions to make.'


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N- Here we go...**

**I hope this reads okay, I am so used to writing in a jovial manner, so to write like this was quite difficult. All this chapter really outlines is how Vera will be dealt with, Anna paving her path to leaving Downton and her trying to assure John it is what she wants. **

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing, all characters belong to ITV and Julian Fellowes.

* * *

Moonlight bathed the corridor as John slowly made his way along it, as promptly as his ailment would allow him. Since the events of last night, sleep had evaded him. As it did on numerous nights. However, the reason for his insomnia was entirely different from those sleepless nights he had previously experienced.

John had told Anna the real reason why he had planned to leave. Vera had a story to tell, a story that would ruin the Grantham's and quite possibly, the relationship between a father and his daughter. He just couldn't allow that to happen. But seeing the desperation in Anna's eyes as she begged him to stay, he realised nothing else mattered. It was time to put her first. Having composed a letter to His Lordship, warning him of Vera's intentions without revealing the details, he hoped this would be enough to save the family to whom he owed so much.

Discussing what would happen once they had both left, John explained that it would be unlikely Vera would offer him a divorce now, whether he bribed her or not. It very much looked like if he and Anna were to be together they would need to move away from Downton. To avoid the whispers. For their life to be bearable at all.

Reaching the stairs that lead to the servants quarters, John was surprised to see light emanating from the room where he had shared meals with his colleagues for so many years. As soon as his cane hit the first step, he saw a figure appear at the bottom of the stairs. Within a millisecond he knew who it was. Continuing his way down, she moved further into the corridor, her expression giving nothing away as he motioned ever closer to her. Had she changed her mind? She seemed pretty adamant last night.

'Good morning,' Anna said softly.

'Morning.' John allowed a faint smile to play upon his lips. 'You should still be in bed. What if someone sees you down here?'

'I'll just say I came to get a drink.' Anna shrugged. 'I had to say goodbye.'

Sighing, John placed his bag on the floor before taking Anna's hand in his. 'Anna, are you...'

'Don't,' Anna interrupted, placing a finger on his lips. 'Don't ask me if I am sure. I'll do what I have to this morning, then we will meet in Ripon tomorrow afternoon to discuss our options.'

'I'll be there.'

'You better be.'

'I feel so guilty.' John continued, focussing his line of sight behind Anna. 'Vera is going to be here to pick me up this morning. And I won't be here. I just hope the note I left is enough. I'm leaving you to pick up the pieces of my not being here...'

'Mr Bates,' Anna said sternly. 'It's time you started thinking about yourself. About your own happiness. Our happiness.'

John nodded before meeting Anna's gaze. 'I best be going. Daisy will be waking everyone up soon.'

'Yes, you should.' Anna agreed. 'Goodbye Mr Bates.'

'Goodbye Anna.' With a smile and a knowing look, John disappeared down the corridor.

* * *

'Your notice?' Mary exclaimed. 'Whatever for?'

Anna stared at Lady Mary's shocked face looking up at her. 'I just feel it's time for me to move on. I have worked at Downton...'

'No Anna, I won't accept that.' Mary said indignantly, turning around in her seat to look at Anna's reflection in her dressing table mirror. 'Just yesterday we were discussing the fashions for the new season and how you were going to help me pick them out. This is an off the cuff decision and I want to know the real reason why you are leaving me.'

Anna couldn't lie to the woman sat in front of her. Mary knew her too well and Anna had too much respect for her than to keep the truth a secret. 'It's Mr Bates.'

'Yes, he handed in his own notice last evening.' As soon as she had spoken the words, a realisation spread over Mary. It was beginning to make sense. 'Anna, what's going on?'

'I love him, my lady.' Anna admitted before realising she had never told another soul about her affections for Mr Bates. Except for the man himself. 'And life without him just doesn't bear thinking about.'

'But he's married, Anna.' Mary argued. 'Is she giving him a divorce?'

Anna's silence spoke volumes.

'Isn't Mrs Bates arriving to pick her husband up this morning?'

'Mr Bates has already left.'

'Already left? What about Mrs Bates?' Anna shrugged. Mary rolled her eyes at Anna's unhelpfulness. 'Well, I'll have to tell Papa.'

'You see, that isn't everything.' Anna continued, her voice threatening to break as the seriousness of the situation threatened to overwhelm her. 'Mrs Bates knows.'

'Knows what?'

'She knows, My Lady.'

The suggestive lilt in Anna's tone was enough for Mary to realise what Anna was trying to reveal. Anger in response to Anna's wanting to leave soon turned to panic. Mary began to pace the floor, Anna a helpless bystander.

'That's why Mr Bates was going to leave with her.' Anna explained. 'In return for her silence, she wanted him to accompany her back to London.'

'And now he's not?'

'No, my Lady.' Anna shook her head. 'Mr Bates left His Lordship a note. Telling him the real reasons why he was leaving, but without giving anything away about the story Vera was planning to tell.'

'I need to speak to Papa.'

* * *

Knocking on the door to the library, Mary entered, followed coyly by Anna. Lord Grantham was staring out of the window, his hands behind his back. Mary's heart was beating so quickly, she felt as though it would burst out of her chest. What was her father thinking? What did he already know?

'Papa.' Mary said with a shaky voice.

Robert turned to look at his daughter, before shifting his gaze to Anna. 'Would someone tell me what on Earth is going on? I've read a cryptic note from Bates, Carson has just had to turn Mrs Bates away because Mr Bates has disappeared...'

'Vera's already been here?' Anna asked.

'Yes, she wanted to speak to me but Mr Carson refused her.' Robert went on to explain. 'Now I want answers. What is this story Mrs Bates is planning to tell to the press? And why would Bates advise me to get my lawyers involved?'

'Oh Papa, I can't tell you.'

'So you don't deny there is a story then?' Robert replied angrily. 'And why isn't Bates leaving with his wife anymore? I am so confused...'

'Because he's leaving with me, M 'Lord.' Anna interrupted.

'With you? Has he been granted a divorce then?'

'No,' Mary interrupted with a wry laugh. 'They are going to live in sin apparently.'

'Anna, really...'

'No, my Lord, I won't have it.' Anna was shocked by her tone for the briefest of moments before carrying on with her argument. 'Mr Bates's wife is of the opinion that if she won't be happy with him, then no one will. We are in love, my Lord. And we want to be together. And if this is the only way to do that, then so be it.'

Mary and her father were shocked into silence before Anna continued. She was openly sobbing now, present company be damned. She was fighting for the man she loved and wouldn't have his name dragged through the mud. For all the respect she held for her mistress, Anna couldn't deny Lady Mary held a selfish streak to her nature.

'Mr Bates was putting you all first. He was leaving to keep this family from ruin. I begged him not to. And he relented. For me. He has finally put me first. We won't be married, it won't be perfect in the eyes of society. But we'll be together. And that's all that matters.'

'I must know what this story entails. Why would Bates want me to get Murray involved?'

'You can't know Papa,' Mary begged.

'Something needs to be put into place to stop Vera,' Anna explained. 'A gag. Is that what they call it? Maybe Mr Bates thought Mr Murray could help.'

'Sir Richard Carlisle.' Mary blurted out loud. 'I met him when I was down in London. He owns half the newspapers there. Maybe he can help. I'll send him a telegram at once.'

'Very well,' Robert sighed. 'I just wish Bates had been honest with me from the start.'

'He was trying to protect you, my Lord. That's all.'

'Mary, go and arrange for that telegram to be sent,' Robert instructed. 'I'd like a moment alone with Anna.'

'Very well, Papa.'

As Mary left, Anna kept her eyes focussed on His Lordship. He rarely asked to see Anna alone. The prospect worried her somewhat. Was he going to try and talk Anna out of leaving?

'Anna, what's really going on here?' Robert asked.

'M 'Lord, I can't reveal to you the details...'

'No, I don't mean that. Besides, I don't think I want to know the story Mrs Bates was trying to tell.' Robert sighed. 'What I mean is, why can't you wait until Mr Bates is divorced?'

'Your Lordship, we have waited the best part of four years to even find out Mrs Bates whereabouts.' Anna explained. 'She won't very well give him a divorce easily after this. We're done with waiting.'

'And your ready for all the grief you will receive? Whispers in the street. People staring as you walk by. You'll be an outcast...'

'Forgive me for speaking out of turn, M' Lord. But I don't care.' Anna said with a conviction in her voice which caused Robert to raise his eyebrows in surprise. 'We'll move away from Downton, away from Yorkshire. Only those who know us will know the truth.'

Robert exhaled deeply, his hands placed firmly behind his back. 'Well then, I suppose I should accept your notice. You'll be required to work two weeks so we can find a replacement. Which is more than Bates left us with.'

'Please, Your Lordship. He did what he did out of respect for you. Please believe that.'

'Hmm, even so. I wish he could have been honest with me.' Robert replied as he walked to sit behind his desk. 'I thought we were friends.'

'M' Lord, I think I can speak for Mr Bates when I say you were, and are, the best friend he has ever had. The admiration he has for you knows no bounds. I hope you will hold on to that.'

* * *

Mr Carson's disapproving glances at Anna across the table were driving her to the brink of madness. He knew of her plans with Mr Bates, however after all the loyalty they had both shown to the family and their employers, she felt she deserved a little more respect. Bells began to ring around them and footmen and maids sprang into action. As Lady Mary's bell sounded, Anna rose to her feet before Mr Carson stood up to block her path.

'Ethel, see to Lady Mary will you?' Mr Carson instructed.

'Ethel?' Mrs Hughes guffawed.

'That is what I said.'

'But I haven't left yet, Mr Carson,' Anna argued.

'I am the Butler of this house and what I say goes.' Mr Carson replied before looking at a grinning Ethel. 'Please do as I have requested. Ethel. Lady Mary is expecting you.'

'Yes, Mr Carson,' Ethel said enthusiastically as she left the servants hall in double quick time.

'Anna, I'd like to see you in private please. Mrs Hughes, you too.'

Both women shared confused glances as they followed the Butler through to his room. Mrs Hughes shut the door behind them as Mr Carson sat behind his desk.

'Anna, Mr Bates left me a note. I know the real reason why he was going to leave with Mrs Bates.'

'Right...'

'But now he has left without her. And you have handed in your notice.' Mr Carson continued. 'Why is that?'

'Oh Anna, you aren't seriously thinking...'

'Of living with a man unmarried,' Mr Carson interrupted Mrs Hughes. 'Yes she is.'

'You're life will be ruined,' Mr Carson yelled so loudly Anna winced, closing her eyes tightly.

'We just want to be together,' Anna whispered.

'But Anna,' Mrs Hughes said calmly, placing a hand on the maid's arm. 'He's married.'

'As you all keep reminding me.'

'Can't you wait for the two of them to divorce?' Mrs Hughes pressed on. 'I'm sure that...'

'Wait?' Anna snapped. 'Wait? That's all I have ever done when it comes to Mr Bates. Well I'm done with waiting. What is the likelihood Mrs Bates will him what he wants now? Close to no chance, wouldn't you say?'

'I will thank you not to take that tone with us, Anna.' Mr Carson advised.

'I'm sorry,' Anna exclaimed, allowing her emotions to overtake her for the numerous time that day.

'What are you going to do?' Mrs Hughes asked. 'Where will you go?'

'I know it will be hard. It is my afternoon off tomorrow and I am meeting him in Ripon. We are going to decide what happens next. I may be leaving without your blessing, but leaving in two weeks to be with Mr Bates is what I shall be doing.'

'We can't stop you from leaving, Anna,' Mr Carson began, his voice now calmer than before. 'But we can warn you about making a mistake you will no doubt regret in a few years time.'

'I don't think I will,' Anna shook her head. 'How can it be wrong, when it feels so right to me. To us?'

'Please go and help William in the dining room.' Mr Carson asked. 'I've said all I needed to or want to on the subject.'

Anna sighed, looked at Mrs Hughes and the concern in her expression before turning on her heels and leaving the room. Once outside the door, she composed herself before making her way up the stairs. It was all out in the open, those who needed to know, did. Now Anna had the small matter of working her two weeks notice. Then life with the man she loved could begin.

* * *

Stirring his tea, John looked up as he heard the door to the tea shop open. It wasn't Anna. Exhaling deeply, he took his watch from his pocket and noted the time. She wasn't late. Not terribly anyway, yet John couldn't help thinking maybe Anna had seen the error of her ways. Placing his watch back in his pocket, he looked up as the door opened once more.

This time, he wasn't disappointed.

He couldn't help it as a grin spread over his lips. The relief he felt when Anna reciprocated his smile was overwhelming. Standing up as Anna moved towards him, he reached out to stroke her hand gently before watching her sit down. Joining her, no words were spoken as he poured Anna a cup of tea, watching her as she removed her gloves.

'Are you alright?' Anna asked as John pushed her tea cup across the table towards her.

'Don't worry about me,' John dismissed her concerns. 'What about you? How has our news been received?'

'Not very well.' Anna looked out of the window before answering. John's heart sank. 'Lady Mary has gathered the aid of some journalist she met in London. A Sir Richard Carlisle?'

'Yes, I have heard of him,' John replied.

'He sent a telegram saying he would deal with Vera.' Anna explained. 'I think there is more going on with him and Lady Mary than meets the eye. Mr Murray was at the house for a while today, as well. Anyway, all this means it is very unlikely Vera will give you a divorce now.'

'We don't have to do this,' John whispered, leaning towards Anna. 'I can just slip away...'

'For goodness sake, Mr Bates,' Anna exclaimed. 'All I've heard since I handed in my notice is what a fool I am being. Lady Mary, His Lordship, Mr Carson and Mrs Hughes. They have all tried to convince me to change my mind. Now you are doing the same. Don't you want this?'

'Anna, I want what's best for you. That's all I have ever wanted.'

'Well then?' Anna murmured before looking beside her, noticing she had drawn some attention to the two of them with her outburst. 'All anyone has said is why this can't happen. So now I am going to list some reasons why it should. I love you. You love me. And we want to be together. That's all the justification I need to know this is the right thing to do.'

'I don't deserve you,' John whispered.

'And you can stop with that talk straight away,' Anna replied, a slight mocking to her tone.

'So everyone knows about our plans?'

'No, just the people I mentioned.' Anna answered. 'Everyone else thinks I am returning to my family.'

'When are you free to leave?'

'In two weeks time. Enough time for them to find a replacement. Lady Mary is going to ask one of the maids from her Aunt Rosamund's staff if she would be interested.'

John nodded in acknowledgement before taking a sip of his tea. 'Do you even know where Vera is?'

'I have no clue,' John shrugged. 'Did she turn up yesterday?'

'Yes, but Mr Carson turned her away, said you left him a note explaining everything.'

'I did. But if Sir Richard thinks he can find her, she must have returned to London.'

'So what happens next?' Anna asked. 'Where are we going to go?'

John's felt his heart ache at Anna's question. It made the whole situation seem so desperate and so reckless. However, John had already begun to make some plans for their future. If Anna was to give up everything to be with him, she deserved to know John had some sort of strategy in place.

'I've been thinking,' John began. 'I have family in Scotland. Vera knows nothing about them or that I even have contacts north of the border so we needn't worry on that account. My cousin, George, owns a public house. He is also landlord to a couple of properties in Aberdeenshire. I have money from my mother which could go towards the rent until we find our feet...'

'I have money as well,' Anna interrupted. 'Not a lot, but I have saved a bit. I could bring that with me.'

'I wouldn't ask that of you, Anna.' John replied. 'If we are to do this then it will be entirely at my cost.'

'Forgive me, Mr Bates. But that isn't fair.' Anna argued. 'If we are to live as man and wife then I'd like to set a few rules down first.'

'Oh really,' John smiled, raising his eyebrows before sitting back in his chair. 'And what might they be?'

'That we are equals in this.'

'Alright, what else?'

'That from the outset you don't feel like you owe me anything for making this sacrifice to be with you. I forced you into this, it is my decision. For the rest of our time together, I don't want you to feel guilty or remorseful. Promise that you can do that for me.'

John simply stared at Anna, remaining silent. He had never loved anyone as much as he loved Anna in this moment. The sheer determination she was showing towards him, in spite of everything she was giving up, overwhelmed him. No one had ever fought for him before.

'I promise,' John said sincerely. 'But you promise me something as well.'

'Anything.'

'In these two weeks I'll go about making sure we have somewhere to go when you have finished your notice. But please use the time to make sure this is what you want.'

'John, I'm not going to say it...'

'You said John,' he interrupted, completely taken by surprise that her uttering his name would render him completely astounded.

'I did,' Anna replied softly. 'I am trying to make you see that I already am sure about this. I'd leave with you right this second if I could. But I owe it to the family to work my notice.'

'All I am saying is think about what it is you are giving up. We can live together as a man and wife should, but we will never actually be married. I'm not saying I'm not happy to do it, but can't you see how wrong that is?'

'No,' Anna shook her head, a solitary tear rolling down her cheek. 'It's not wrong. I love you so much. And I don't see why a formality like you being married should stop us from living together the way we both want to.'

'I love you too,' John responded by reaching across the table to take Anna's hand in his own. 'But please think about this. I'll be in this very tea shop two weeks from today. If you are here by three o clock, then I will take you to the train station and we will travel to Scotland to begin our new life. If you aren't, then I will fully understand your decision.'

'I'll be here,' Anna squeezed John's hand before affording him another smile.

'It won't be easy.'

'I know that,' Anna nodded. 'I do. But I can tell you that it is going to be worth it.'


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N- Anna says goodbye to Downton in this chapter. It is quite heavy on the descriptive side but I've tried to break it up as best I can. Also, not a lot of John but this is the last chapter where they are apart.**

**Disclaimer- **All characters belong to Julian Fellowes except for George. He can have George if I can swap him for Banna.

* * *

Anna sat at the table in the servants hall, stirring her tea aimlessly , her thoughts fully focussed on what was going to happen the next day. Tonight was her last night of service, tomorrow her new life would begin. Her feelings were all over the place. One moment she would be contemplating all she was giving up. She felt safe here, Downton had been her home for so long. She had become a woman inside these four walls. She looked at the empty seat beside her, then her mind was filled with thoughts of John. Life without him was unbearable, even though they had only been apart a couple of weeks. If it was this hard to be without him for such a small amount of time, Anna shuddered at the thought of what might have happened had he left that night. She belonged by John's side. That much she was certain of.

John had written to her in the two weeks they had been apart. Anna ran over the details of John's letter in her mind. Although the houses his cousin owned were both occupied, one tenant was planning to move. The house would be theirs in a month or so. In the meantime, John's cousin George had a couple of single rooms above the public house he owned that would be free for them both to use. On top of this, George had offered John the chance to join his staff at the public house. Everything seemed to be falling into place.

George knew the truth, John explaining to Anna in his letter that he couldn't lie to the man after he had been so generous. He assured her that George wouldn't judge and would keep their secret. It seemed not one of John's relatives had ever been overjoyed at the union between him and Vera. John so wished he had listened to the voices who had warned him against being joined in matrimony with such a woman. Still, these things happened for a reason, and as he explained in his correspondence, his path may have never lead to Downton, to Anna, if his situation had been different.

The next portion of the letter went on to discuss the practicalities of their life together. If they were to live in this manner, they would have to convince those around them that they were man and wife. The dear man was asking if Anna would mind that she would now have to be known as Anna Bates. What would it take to make him see that she wanted that more than anything in her whole life? Their union wouldn't be official, but as far as anyone would know, it was. And if that was the way it had to be for Anna to be with the man she loved, then she would wholeheartedly accept it.

He then went on to write about Vera, and that he hoped she hadn't returned to Downton. The truth was, no one knew of her whereabouts. Lady Mary had confided in Anna that her contact in London had managed to buy the story from Vera, on the pretence she wouldn't tell it to anyone else. Carlisle explained Vera had reacted badly when she realised she had been tricked. Since then, Mr Bates's wife hadn't been seen.

John's writings concluded on him reminding Anna to be sure this is what she wanted. He couldn't bear the thought that a little while down the line she would end up regretting the decision she had made. Anna sighed and rolled her eyes as she read the words before her. Her mind was made up, and if he knew her at all, John would know that when Anna made a decision it was because she truly believed in it.

'Anna, Lady Mary is ringing her bell,' Mr Carson said, shaking Anna out of her thoughts. 'I know the new maid is here and already working, but you haven't given up your duties just yet.'

'Yes, Mr Carson.' Anna replied, standing up. She was distracted by William appearing in the entrance to the hall.

'Anna, His Lordship would like to see you in his library once you have dressed Lady Mary for dinner.'

'Why?' Anna replied, her brow furrowed.

'How should I know?' William shrugged, sitting down at the table. He had been moody recently, mostly as a result his father's reluctance at him joining the war effort. Add to this, the fact that his workload was now double because of Thomas's absence, he wasn't the most content footman in the world. As soon as his hand was on the teapot in front of him, he was interrupted.

'William, you are needed in the dining room. Don't just sit around lad.' Carson bellowed as Anna left the room.

'Yes, Mr Carson,' William said with a sigh.

* * *

After watching Lady Mary being dressed in near silence, Anna came to stand at the side of the room, waiting to be relieved of her duties until after dinner. It had been her job to show the new maid, Amy, the responsibilities of her new position and Anna had stepped aside to allow the maid the chance to do things for herself tonight.

'Anna, I would request that you dress me for bed this evening,' Mary said sternly, looking at Anna's reflection in her mirror. 'Let Amy get a proper nights rest before she begins tomorrow.'

'Very well, my Lady,' Anna replied, taken aback to the harshness in Mary's tone. She hadn't quite forgiven Anna for leaving her, or for the trouble Bates leaving may have brought upon the family had Sir Richard not stepped in.

'I may be a bit later than usual, Sir Richard is joining us this evening.' Mary explained before turning her attentions to Amy. 'You may go now.'

Amy nodded, leaving the room before Anna made to follow her. Stopping, Anna met Lady Mary's gaze. 'Is there anything else I can do for you before I leave, my Lady?'

Lady Mary shook her head. 'You should go, I was asked by Papa not to keep you longer than I needed to. He has something he would like to discuss.'

* * *

Knocking on the grand door in front of her, Anna waited for the command to enter the library. As it came, Anna stepped inside and was greeted by the back of Lord Grantham, leant over his desk composing a letter of some sort.

'Ahh yes, Anna.' He began. 'Do come in.'

'Is something wrong, my Lord?' Anna asked, treading carefully towards him.

'Just this whole sorry mess we find ourselves in,' Robert admitted. 'Now his wife has been silenced, is there really no way Bates can return to Downton?'

Inhaling deeply, Anna found herself explaining the desperation of the situation she found herself in once again. 'No, my Lord. Mrs Bates has disappeared. If Mr Bates came back, we would be in the same predicament we have always been in. Besides, it's unlikely Mrs Bates would grant him the divorce even if we could find her.'

'Wouldn't it be better for all involved if he did come back?' Robert continued. 'I have contacts, I am offering my assistance in resolving your situation. I will help to find her, use any methods I can to bring about a divorce. It will take time but...'

'Sorry my Lord,' Anna interrupted. 'But I am done with waiting. We both are.'

'Living with a man unmarried, though. Anna, you will be ruined.'

'The only time I will consider myself ruined, my Lord, is the day I am not living my life by Mr Bates's side. You know our plans. We are moving to Scotland. The only people who know the truth are you, Lady Mary, Mr Carson, Mrs Hughes and a cousin of Mr Bates. As far as our new neighbours are concerned, we are newlyweds. People here believe I am moving back home.'

'Oh, I don't know. It's just all so deceitful,' Robert replied.

'Maybe it is,' Anna shrugged, her voice breaking with raw emotion as she approached the man stood before her. 'But my Lord. Do you understand what it's like to be so completely in love with someone...'

'Anna, I'd like to remind you I have been married for over twenty five years.'

'Yes, my Lord but even so. We are both from different social standings. I expect there were no barriers when you were pursuing Her Ladyship. Mr Bates and I have had nothing but hurdles to overcome.'

Robert locked his gaze with Anna, thoughts of the real reasons he had pursued his wife in the beginning occupying his thoughts. He closed his eyes as the shame of his motives came back to haunt him once again. Although deeply in love with his wife now, that was certainly not the case in the beginning.

'Mr Bates and I, we have had to be patient and fight for the little we have. I suppose you could say his gallantry has been a barrier on numerous occasions. However, just this once I asked him to put me first. And he has.'

'But Anna. You deserve so much more than...'

'Than what, my Lord?' Anna interrupted, her tone more abrasive than she would have liked. 'Than spending my life with the only person who gives it meaning? I understand that we will most probably never be married. Yes, I will technically be his mistress. But my heart will belong to him, and at the end of the day that is all that really matters, isn't it?'

'Very well.' Anna felt inwardly relieved as Robert's facial expression softened at her last statement. He turned to take an envelope from his desk. 'Not that I feel what you are doing is right, it is certainly not my place to stop you. Please, take this. It is a letter to Bates.'

'Yes, my Lord.' Anna nodded, taking the paper from Robert. 'And thank you. For everything.'

'No, thank you.' Robert smiled. 'You have been a fine worker, the finest maid I have ever encountered in my life here at Downton. If anyone deserves happiness, it's you and Bates.'

* * *

Reaching Lady Mary's room, Anna was surprised when she found her already undressed and ready for bed. Anna then turned her gaze to the bed, three outfits had been laid out.

'Shall I put these away, my Lady?' Anna asked, picking the first one up and moving to the wardrobe.

'No need, they are for you.' Mary said indifferently before approaching Anna with a small wooden box. 'And these.'

Completely and utterly confused, Anna took the box and slowly opened the lid. Inside were various hair pins Anna had spent the past few years fixing Lady Mary's hair with. Amongst them were a pair of broaches, two which Mary knew Anna had admired.

'I don't understand,' Anna said weakly.

'Well, you can't start your new life without a few provisions,' Mary smiled warmly. 'It's the least I can do.'

'I'm lost for words.' Anna breathed.

'Just promise me you'll write.' Anna nodded before Mary continued. 'And that you'll be ever so happy.'

'My Lady, I am at a loss...'

'Let's just say, I am beginning to realise how fragile love is. And that when you find it, you should do everything in your power to keep it.'

'Thank you, my lady.'

'Now, take these things and go to bed. I'm sure you have some packing to do.'

'Yes, my Lady.'

'Before you leave, I just want to say if Amy turns out to be half as good to me as you have been, then I'll be very lucky indeed.'

'Thank you,' Anna smiled, a tear falling down her cheek. She certainly hadn't expected this, especially when she took into account the manner in which Mary had been behaving towards her since she had handed in her notice.

Picking up the outfits and resting them over her arm, she nodded in the direction of Mary before moving towards the door.

'And Anna,' Mary called after her. Anna turned to face Mary. She looked genuinely upset to be saying goodbye to the person who had been her confidante for so long. 'The best of luck.'

'And you, my Lady.'

* * *

Pouring herself one last cup of tea in the servants hall, Anna looked around the old room as she waited for her time to leave. On her own after lunch, the rest of the servants had gone about their tasks, leaving Anna to reminisce. This room had seen so much. Many things had happened to Anna in this hall. She remembered her first day, a bright eyed eighteen year old standing in the doorway as everyone fixed their gaze on her. Most of the staff from that time had moved on to pastures new, but some remained. Mr Carson and Mrs Hughes of course, the latter being a tower of strength to Anna when in times of need. A mother figure to the maids in her employ and someone Anna was grateful to have in her life. Mrs Patmore, who never had anything but a kind word or a cheerful smile for the young maid. Then there was Miss O Brien, who Anna was sure only smiled at someone else's discomfort. William, Daisy and Thomas had started a little while after Anna. She adored William and would be sorry to say goodbye to him. She saw Daisy as a younger sister, someone who would always come to her for advice. She'd miss that.

Then she remembered the first time she had seen John.

Once in the servants hall, his impairment was up for much debate between the staff. John, being John, was trying to convince everyone he could manage. He had such conviction in his voice, that he didn't see his limp as a problem and neither should anyone else. Anna had to admit as he looked over his shoulder at her as she reinforced his argument, she felt her knees weaken. From that very first meeting she was smitten with him.

Anna thought about the many discussions she and John had shared, each one convincing her more and more that she was falling in love with him. About their favourite books, music, politics, anything would become an hour long conversation. Sometimes, she wouldn't really comprehend what John was saying, just becoming lost in his eyes, his demeanour. To Anna, a more perfect man had never existed.

They had discussed their future here, the hotel John had suggested they buy. The children. Anna's heart fluttered at the thought. She placed a hand on her stomach as she imagined carrying John's baby. Closing her eyes, Anna took in a deep breath. She was really leaving, to live a life with the man she cherished more that anyone or anything. It was almost too perfect to comprehend.

'Anna, Mr Branson is ready to drive you to Ripon, now.'

Turning to see Mr Carson standing in the doorway to the servants hall, Anna stood up. 'I'm sorry? I thought I was taking...'

'At His Lordship's request, the chauffeur shall be escorting you.' Mr Carson explained.

'Oh,' Anna said weakly as Mrs Hughes joined them in the abandoned hall. 'I suppose this is goodbye then.'

'Yes, it is.' Mr Carson agreed, no hint of emotion in his voice. 'I wish you luck in your future endeavours, Anna.'

'Thank you Mr Carson. And you, Mrs Hughes. I owe you both so much, thank you doesn't seem to do the situation justice.'

'We'll be sorry to see you go.' Mrs Hughes said tenderly, stroking the top of Anna's arm. 'We've seen you grow into a fine young woman before our very eyes. And we understand the reasons why you are doing what you are doing.' Mr Carson grunted softly at Mrs Hughes statement. 'Don't we, Mr Carson.'

'I suppose so,' Mr Carson sighed. 'Doesn't mean I have to be overjoyed at the fact I am losing my best maid.'

'Amy will do you proud,' Anna smiled. 'I best be going.'

With a nod of the head to her former employers, Anna picked up her bag, much heavier with the addition of Lady Mary's offering. Walking out of the servants hall, she was greeted by Miss O Brien coming down the stairs. A slight smile was exchanged before Anna continued on her way. Miss O Brien watched her leave before lingering by the servants hall entrance, stopping to hear the conversation between the Butler and the Housekeeper that was now ongoing in the servants hall.

'Oh, I know they are in love with eachother,' Carson sighed. 'But the whole situation is just wrong. Fleeing to Scotland to be together, unable to legally marry. I just can't see it working.'

Miss O Brien couldn't believe her ears. Everything seemed to go right for Mr Bates. no matter the situation. She inwardly cursed the man who had done nothing but cause problems between the downstairs staff since he had arrived. In her mind anyway.

'Miss O Brien,' Mrs Hughes uttered, slightly surprised to see her standing in the corridor. 'Can we help you?'

'Just came down here for a bit of piece and quiet whilst I do some sewing,' Miss O Brien said innocently enough. 'Unless you have another task for me?'

'No, go about your business, Miss O Brien,' Carson replied. 'Shall we go through these accounts, Mrs Hughes? They won't sort themselves.'

* * *

Taking his watch from his pocket, John read the time. Only two minutes on from when he last looked. half past two. Anna still had half an hour, their train didn't leave for an hour. Yet John still held lingering doubts. Trying to push them to the back of his mind, he thought of what was waiting for them back in Scotland.

Aberdeenshire. Peterhead to be exact. Family on his father's side still remained, his Scottish cousins the hosts on many a vacation in his childhood. Despite only exchanging letters for years, visits limited, George was just the same as he always had been towards John. If you were his blood, then he couldn't do enough for you.

Although his Scottish relatives never met Vera in person, they heard all about her in John's letters. George understood why John needed to get away. John had told him all about Anna, how no woman had ever made him feel the way she did. John had never spoken with such conviction when talking about Vera. Modern in his opinions and views on the world, George was only too willing to keep John and Anna's secret in tact. If it meant John would be happy then George would assist in any way he could.

Two single rooms were waiting for them in The Swan, the public house that George owned in Peterhead. He owned two homes in the area too that he rented out. The cottage, two doors down from the public house was the one which would soon be vacated. John had seen it, it was perfect. Perfect for him and Anna.

God, how he had missed her. How he ever thought he could leave Anna for good was now beyond him. This was right. She was his everything and right now being reunited with her and leading her to their new life was all he could think about. Forget about the flaws in the situation, Anna and John would be living as man and wife. How could that be wrong?

Then she appeared. It was as if time had stopped. At this moment in time, only he and Anna existed. John was sure he had never seen anything as beautiful as Anna looked to him right now. Her smile was wide, her eyes focussed solely on him as she made her way towards where he was standing in the small tea shop.

'Hello.' Anna said softly.

'Hello,' John smiled. 'You're here.'

'Of course I am,' Anna replied. 'I told you I would be. And as you should know by now, I never go back on my word.'

'Would you like a cup of tea before we go to the station?'

'Let's just get moving, shall we?'

John nodded, standing up and putting on his coat. He had Anna's undivided attention as he put on his gloves, his hat before reaching towards the back of the chair opposite him for his cane. Following Anna, he noticed the large bag she was carrying. All her worldly possessions were in that case. Her whole life. John was beginning to realise how much he owed this wonderful woman who was giving up everything to be with him. He decided in that split second he would never take Anna for granted.

Reaching the street outside the shop, John stopped Anna by gently taking hold of her wrist. Leading her to the edge of the pavement so they weren't in the flow of people going about their daily business, John turned to face her. Anna watched as he rested his cane on his own wrist before taking her bag.

'John, you can't. You need your cane...'

'Sssh,' he whispered before reaching for Anna's hand. They walked a few paces in the direction of the station before John continued. 'The least I can do is carry your bag and hold your hand. It's my duty to take care of you now and to keep you safe.'


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N- Thank you for the reviews so far, they mean a lot :) **

**John and Anna arrive in Scotland in this chapter, ready to begin their new life. Fluffiness aplenty. **

**Disclaimer:** Same as chapters 1, 2 and 3.

* * *

John stared out of the train window, completely contented for the first time in what seemed like years. They were nearing their destination, the twilight shining down on the breathtaking scenery the Scottish countryside had to offer. However, something much more breathtaking was a little closer to home. Anna was sleeping peacefully by his side, her head resting on his shoulder, their fingers entwined.

Earlier on in the journey, the conversation had flowed like it always did between himself and Anna. John had asked questions about Anna's final fortnight at Downton. His regret at not being by her side to defend their decision was eating away at him whilst he was in Scotland, yet Anna reassured him it was nothing she couldn't handle. Seeing Anna's feisty side for himself in the times she had defended him, John didn't doubt it.

Neither broached the subject about the shift their relationship would be taking now. John seeming to feel the situation was too delicate to discuss it, Anna feeling a train carriage was possibly not the most appropriate location to talk about such a thing. John had resigned himself to the fact nothing would happen between them until they had moved into the cottage, separate bedrooms at George's pub wouldn't aid the situation. He had to admit he felt somewhat relieved Anna would have some time to adjust to her new surroundings before it was just the two of them alone.

As the train began to slow as it reached it's final stop, John decided it was time to gently wake Anna. Leaning forward slightly, Anna stirred, muttered something incoherent that John didn't even try to comprehend before smiling as he looked down at her now frowning face. It wasn't lost on John that in all the years he had known Anna, this was the first time he was experiencing having to wake her.

'Anna,' he whispered softly. She slowly opened her eyes, took in the sight of John before her, smiled before closing her eyes again. 'We're nearly there, my love.'

'Oh,' Anna murmured, stretching out her legs in front of her. 'How long have I been asleep?'

'Since Edinburgh,' John replied, taking it upon himself to brush a strand of Anna's golden hair from her face. He watched transfixed as she wriggled in her seat, pinching the bridge of her nose with her thumb and index finger. 'I'm sure it's been a long day for you.'

'Aren't you tired?' Anna asked before her face erupted into a yawn, much to John's amusement.

'A little, never been the best at falling asleep whilst travelling though.' John admitted before looking at his watch. 'Not really a great sleeper at the best of times.'

'I never knew that about you,' Anna said, smiling sweetly as she looked up at him.

'Well, we have a lot to learn about each other,' John replied.

'We certainly do,' Anna agreed with a smirk, an expression John couldn't wait to see more of. 'Is George meeting us?'

'Yes, he's bringing his van to the station.' John explained. 'It's quite a drive to Peterhead, I'm not sure we'll be there much before midnight.'

The train pulled into Aberdeen station without another word from either. John stood up and he and Anna prepared themselves to leave the train. Both reaching up for Anna's bag from the overhead racking, they laughed softly as each of their hands grazed the others.

'John, I can manage my bag to the van.' Anna said resolutely as she hauled it down from above her. Immediately, John took it in his own grasp before reaching for his cane.

'I told you, it's my obligation to ensure your welfare from now on,' John argued. 'And that includes carrying your bag.'

Anna rolled her eyes as John gestured for her to move from the carriage to the door. She did as she was instructed, but not before John stepped down onto the platform first, placed Anna's luggage on the ground before holding his hand out to help her down to stand beside him.

'Thank you, Mr Bates.' Anna said as her feet hit the floor. 'I must say, I am liking discovering this chivalrous side to your nature.'

'I'm glad.'

Standing by as John once again picked up the bag before resting his cane on his wrist, Anna smiled as he held out his hand for her to hold. Beginning to walk, Anna turned her gaze downwards as John limped beside her.

'I'm sure this isn't doing your leg any good at all,' Anna remarked before wrapping her fingers around his gloved hand.

'Maybe so, but it's doing my conscious the world of good.'

Anna stopped in her tracks at his comment, John ceasing his movements too before looking back at her. 'I thought you promised me under no circumstances would you feel guilty about this. I am here because I want to be with you. There is no where on Earth I would rather be than by your side. Remember that.'

John nodded.

Noticing the platform was practically deserted, most of the passengers having alighted in Edinburgh, John found the courage to be a little bolder. Letting go of her hand, he placed an arm around the small of Anna's back, his hand splayed on her hip. He heard Anna gasp at the contact, the sound causing his heart to beat a little faster. They stopped walking for a moment, John leaning his head to whisper in Anna's ear.

'From this day forward, no one is more important to me than you. From now until the last breath leaves my body, you are the one I'm living for.'

The urge to kiss the man standing before her after the beautiful thing he had just said to her overwhelming, Anna leant up on her tiptoes to place a soft kiss against his lips.

'So this must be Anna.'

Immediately pulling away, the deep Scottish voice shattering the moment between them, John turned to see George standing at the end of the platform, hand in his pockets puffing away on a cigarette.

'At least, I hope it's Anna.' Letting out a hearty laugh, he walk towards them as John and Anna looked on amusingly as George approached them.

'George, I'd like you to meet Anna. Anna, this is my cousin, George.'

Although as tall as his cousin, George was a lot leaner than John. His hair was dark, although slightly greying at the temples. George possessed the same crinkles around the edges of his eyes as John, yet the colour of his eyes were a sparkling blue, compared to John's green. His accent was strong, Anna picked up on that straight away. He was dressed neatly, a flat cap accompanying a tweed suit, although no tie. Coming from the world she had, that was a rarity.

'Hello young Anna.' George smiled, taking Anna's hand and bowing his head. 'Welcome to Scotland.'

'Thank you,' Anna replied. 'For everything. I hear you have been quite sensitive to our situation.'

'It's no bother,' George dismissed Anna's words. 'John's family. And if he says you're worth it, then by God I know that's the truth.' Anna and John exchanged a look before George reached for Anna's bag. 'Van's this way.'

* * *

The drive back to Peterhead passed quickly, Anna eager to hear all about the place she was now to call home. Once at their destination, Anna stepped out of the van to take in George's livelihood, The Swan. It was at the centre of the community, the moonlight illuminating signs for the Post Office, a small tea room, a butchers and a bakery. It wasn't too dissimilar to Downton. Anna felt glad for that.

Anna smiled as she felt John's hand at the small of her back. 'Is it alright?'

Nodding, Anna turned to look up at John's face. 'Perfectly.'

'Right, follow me,' George announced, carrying Anna's bag in the direction of a small alleyway next to the pub.

'Before we do George, do you mind if I just have a moment alone with Anna, perhaps show her the outside of the cottage which will be ours soon.'

'Of course,' George replied, walking towards John with his keys. 'Take these so you can lock up when you return, I'll put the bag in Anna's room.'

'Thank you, George.' John smiled.

With a doff of his cap, George disappeared into the pub through the side entrance. Nothing was said as John held his hand out to Anna. She took it gladly, following him as he led her away from the shops to a row of properties further along the road. Anna couldn't deny it, she loved the closeness their new situation was affording them. Never would she have dreamed to have sat so close to John on the train as she did, let alone hold his hand in public. Nothing felt awkward or forced, both Anna and John safe in the knowledge that despite the practicalities of the situation, this was where each of them belonged, this was right.

'So, this shall be our home soon,' John whispered, breaking the silence that had fallen between them as they stopped outside a white building with a thatched roof. Looking down as he heard Anna outwardly gasp, the smile on her face took John's breath away. 'Is everything alright?'

'Yes,' Anna answered, her voice breaking with emotion. 'The cottage is beautiful. It's just, our home has such a lovely ring to it.'

John smiled. 'It certainly does.'

The cottage wasn't very big, but they didn't need it to be. From the memories of his visit, John explained it had three bedrooms, a bathroom, a decent sized kitchen and a living room comfortable enough to share their evenings together in. The garden was a fair size as well.

'We've never shared anything before. It almost feels like a dream.'

'Well, it's not,' John replied, squeezing her hand. 'It's very real. And to that end...'

Beginning to walk again, John led Anna away from the cottage to a small pathway a few doors along.

'Mr Bates, where are we...'

'Sssh,' John said as they treaded carefully along the path. After a minute or so, an old barn appeared, their surroundings dimly lit by a bonfire burning in the adjacent field.

'Shouldn't we alert somebody about that fire?' Anna asked, looking beyond John at the flames burning brightly.

'It's fine, the farmer often has a bonfire.' John explained before pulling Anna towards the barn. She asked no further questions as John turned to face her just outside the entrance. 'You may be wondering why I've brought you around here.'

'I was rather, yes,' Anna replied, smiling slightly. Her stomach fluttered in anticipation.

'I don't want anyone to see what's about to happen.' John began. 'If this is to work.'

Anna creased her brow as she tried to ascertain John's meaning. Noticing a flickering of movement out of the corner of her eye, Anna watched as John's hand found the inside pocket of his coat. Removing his hand, she was even more confused as John revealed a small red box. Remaining silent, John flicked open the box to reveal a simple gold band.

'Mr Bates, I...'

'People here think you are my wife,' John began to explain as he took the ring and put the box back in his pocket. 'George is the only person who knows the truth.'

'Yes, I know that,' Anna nodded.

'So, you'll need a ring,' John continued. 'It was my mothers wedding ring. She left it to me when she died. I remember her saying in her last few days, I was to give it to that lovely young lady when I finally free myself of Vera.'

'I don't know what to say,' Anna gasped, looking at the ring shining in the moonlight.

'Then listen to me,' John said, taking Anna's left hand in his. He composed himself, sighing slightly as he tried to think of the right words to use. 'I'm not free of Vera. And am unlikely to be for a long time, if ever. I just want you to make sure this is what you want. '

'I'm not even going to dignify that request with an answer, Mr Bates.' Anna shook her head.

'The bare bones of this is that I am a married man. If we are to live as a man and wife should, in principle, you shall be my mistress.'

'I can't wait to get started, Mr Bates,' Anna purred, John glad of the darkness hiding the blush that had spread across his face.

'Our children shall be born out of wedlock. Who knows what...'

'Forgive me for being abrupt, Mr Bates, but do be quiet,' Anna interrupted, the slightest hint of a smirk making itself known on John's lips as he stopped to listen to her. 'I know the situation. I agreed to it, I suggested it for heavens sake. And children? We haven't even shared a bed yet.'

'As for that side of things, I would never force you to do...'

'Mr Bates.' Anna exclaimed, frustration evident in her tone and her demeanour. 'If we are to live as a married couple, then I want to enjoy all the benefits those circumstances bring. I didn't give up everything to be with you for nothing.'

'Is this what being married to you is going to be like?' John asked, laughing softly. 'You always knowing best.'

'Probably,' Anna jested before they both erupted into laughter.

'Anna, all I can offer you is my heart, it's yours and has been since the first moment I saw you.'

'And that's all I need,' Anna said softly, looking down as John gently pushed the gold band over the top of her ring finger. 'Oh God...'

'You can't be my wife in the eyes of the law, but know that you are the only woman I have ever loved. I am never going to leave you of my own accord, Anna. It would be impossible.' John continued, his words so sincere and full of conviction. 'Nothing in this world will ever seem that terrible again, because I shall be safe in the knowledge that you are in my life, by my side till death do us part.'

'I'll always be here, John.' Anna replied, affirming his words. 'You mean everything to me. I don't need anyone else.'

Now crying as her emotions overtook her, Anna watched intently as, with a shaky hand, John moved the ring further down her finger to rest where it would now remain for the rest of her days. A perfect fit. Entwining their fingers on their left hands, John's cane lay abandoned on the floor as he used his right hand to pull Anna closer to him, his arm now firmly around her waist.

Foreheads touching, breath mingling in the cool night air, John met Anna's lips with his own in a gentle kiss, cementing the vow they had just made to the other. This was it. They had made the break, chosen to be together. Live in sin, as Anna had put it in the courtyard that night. No regrets were felt by either, they were simply meant to be together and had been since the moment John walked into Downton. Their love for each other was simply too strong for this not to happen, no matter what.

* * *

On the walk back, John had explained how he felt it was right, that whilst living under George's roof, they should occupy separate rooms. Anna agreed, herself believing she would feel more comfortable taking that step in their relationship in their own home, despite her comments outside the barn. The cottage would be theirs in two short weeks, they had waited long enough, surely the matter of a fortnight wouldn't be too difficult.

Arriving back at The Swan, John quietly opened the door and allowed Anna in before him. Closing the door, careful not to wake George who was sure to be sleeping soundly by now, John locked the door as Anna waited patiently, taking in her new surroundings. The stale smell of smoke still filled the air, Anna coughing softly as it reached the back of her throat. John squeezed her arm gently.

'This isn't permanent,' he whispered. 'You won't have to get used to this.'

'It's fine,' Anna insisted. 'Can you show me to my room?'

'Of course,' John smiled. 'Follow me.'

Walking up the staircase, John winced as sharp creaks filled the air. Once at the top, John turned to look for Anna. Noticing she was right behind him, he carried on down the hall to the end, stopping outside a white door.

'This room is the bigger of the two,' John explained. 'I'll have the one next door.'

'Alright,' Anna shrugged. 'Size doesn't bother me, you know.'

'That's good to know,' John smirked. 'Saves you being disappointed in the future.'

'You cheeky beggar,' Anna hissed, stifling a giggle as she playfully hit John on the arm.

'George chose this room for you anyway,' John explained. 'It's the one with fire and if I'm right...'

Opening the door, Anna's eyes were attracted to the light coming from the fireplace. George had lit it for her before he retired to bed himself.

'George lit this for me?' Anna asked, stepping into the room. John remained where he was, not wanting to seem too forward in following Anna into the room. Looking back over her shoulder, Anna frowned as she noticed John still standing in the hallway. 'You can come in, you know.'

'If that's alright.'

'For goodness sake,' Anna sighed, reaching out a hand towards him, grabbing him by the wrist and pulling him into the room. John laughed before finding her waist with his hands. 'You're mine now, not quite in every sense of the word but I'm hoping that won't be the case for too much longer.'

'Two weeks, then the current occupants would have moved and the cottage will be ours.' John assured Anna.

'Oh, I almost forgot,' Anna said suddenly, freeing herself of John's embrace and moving to her bag which George had placed on her bed. Reaching inside, she pulled out two envelopes. One thin white one, one slightly thicker brown one. She handed John the white one first. 'That is a letter, from His Lordship.'

'For me?'

'Yes,' Anna replied before moving the brown envelope towards John. 'And this is my contribution to our new life.'

Taking the envelope, John looked inside and saw money which had to amount to a couple of hundred pounds. Closing it immediately, he gave it back to Anna.

'What?' Anna asked, reluctantly taking the envelope back.

'I told you, this will all be at my expense,' John replied. 'Save your money to do with it something you can enjoy. I won't accept it.'

'John...' Anna said sternly.

'No, I won't have it,' John reiterated. 'And to prove my point, I'm going to leave you now and go to bed.'

'Very well,' Anna sighed, following him to the door. 'But this isn't over.'

Reaching the door, John turned to look at her. 'This is goodnight then.'

'I guess it is,' Anna smiled, reaching up to wrap her arms around John's shoulders. 'I do love you. So very much.'

'I love you too,' John replied, closing the distance between them, placing his own hands on Anna's waist. 'Would it be alright to kiss you goodnight?'

'I'd be upset if you didn't.'

Meeting each other's lips in a gentle kiss, John didn't attempt to deepen it, fear of getting carried away in the privacy of their current environment too strong. Pulling apart, John brushed Anna's lips with his one more time before stepping into the corridor.

'We eat breakfast as half seven.' John explained. 'I can knock to accompany you down to the dining room if you if you would like.'

'I'd love that.'

'Very well. Goodnight then, Anna. My darling.' Taking her hand in his, he gently kissed her knuckles before meeting her eyes with a knowing gaze.

'Goodnight John.' Anna replied softly.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N- Sorry it's taken so long to update and thank you for all your reviews. They've all been so kind. **

**Disclaimer**: Downton Abbey, John and Anna belong to Julian Fellowes and ITV.

* * *

Opening the bedroom door, John walked the few steps tentatively to his left, and Anna's room. It was his mindset, built after years of things not going right, for John to think Anna may have slept on yesterday's events and have changed her mind. His nervousness manifested itself in John straightening his tie for the hundredth time, even though he knew it was fine. Sighing deeply, he knocked carefully on the door before him.

Before he'd even had a chance to breathe, Anna had spoken.

'Come on in,' she called cheerfully from behind the door.

Anna wanted him to enter her room? This must be a good sign. John's hesitancy all but disappeared as he opened the door. Sitting before him was Anna at the small dresser in her room, carefully pinning her hair up, smiling at his reflection in the mirror.

'Good morning,' she beamed, turning around on her chair to look at him. 'Sleep well?'

'Not bad, really.' John replied, closing the door behind him. 'Or as bad as I was expecting. I thought my knee might give me trouble after that long journey.'

'But it didn't?' Anna continued, turning around again to put the finishing touches to her appearance. John thought she looked perfect, as always.

'No,' John breathed, completely mesmerised by the simplest of tasks that was routine to the woman sitting in front of him. 'You look really beautiful today, Anna.'

'Thank you, Mr Bates,' Anna responded with a smile before closing her eyes and laughing gently. 'Sorry.'

'What is it?' John asked, failing to see what was so amusing.

'Well,' Anna began, standing up and walking towards him. 'If we are married now, I am going to have to stop calling you Mr Bates. In the big house it may have been considered etiquette, but here it doesn't seem right, does it?'

As she reached him, she stood on her tip toes and placed her arms around his shoulders. John leaned into her touch, brushing his lips gently against hers. Finding her waist with his own arms, John pulled Anna even closer to him.

'No,' John murmured. 'I suppose my wife calling me Mr Bates would be deemed slightly odd.'

'Yes,' Anna agreed before a playful smirk took over her lips, her eyes sparkling. 'However, it might depend on the situation, one would presume.'

John narrowed his eyes at Anna. 'What do you mean?'

'Well, when we are alone it may be more efficient to call you Mr Bates, to let you know in no uncertain terms what it is, I want.' With those words she moved away from John and treaded the carpet towards the door. John was left open mouthed. 'Are we going down for breakfast, John?'

'You naughty girl,' John growled, following Anna to the door.

* * *

George was just finishing his breakfast as John and Anna arrived downstairs. He almost instantly noticed the ring on Anna's finger, realising last night they must have affirmed their union. To the eyes of those who didn't know her, Anna was now known as Anna Bates, John's wife.

'So, the cottage should be yours in a little under two weeks, The McArthur's are moving up to Glasgow to be nearer the husband's mother.' George explained, drinking the remains of his tea before laughter over took him. 'Why he'd want to do that, I don't know. If it were me, I'd like to be as far away from my mother in law as is humanly possible.'

'Have you ever been married, George?' Anna asked. John and George exchanged a look, the latter lowering his eyes which Anna detected. 'Sorry, I don't mean to pry...'

'No, don't be ridiculous Anna. You're family, it's not prying.' George replied. 'My wife died a few years ago.'

'Oh, I am sorry.'

'Please, it's perfectly alright,' George insisted, standing up and taking his flat cap from the mantelpiece. 'I must get to the brewery. They keep sending this one ale I have crossed off the delivery. Maybe actually seeing them in person will do the job. John knows where everything is if you want some more breakfast, take care now.'

Leaving the two of them to their own devices, Anna waited to make sure George had left before continuing to speak.

'I hope I didn't just put my foot in it.'

'No, he'd have said something if you did. George isn't the type to keep what he's thinking inside.'

'Not a trait that runs through the whole family then,' Anna remarked slyly, John meeting her gaze before she looked away. 'By the way, I've been meaning to ask. What did his Lordship have to say in his letter?'

'It was all very pleasant,' John explained as he watched Anna's every move. 'He wasn't going to pretend he was happy about the situation, but he understands why we have done what we have.'

'So he wasn't nasty?' Anna asked as she buttered a slice of toast.

'God no,' John replied with a small laugh. 'Just reminded me of how grateful he was for everything I had ever done for him and that he wished us the best of luck. He also told me in no uncertain terms that if anything happened to you I would have him to answer to.'

'Blimey, there's a thought,' Anna took a bite from her toast. 'So we've only gone and done it, then. Followed our plan through.'

'Yes, we have,' John smiled, taking Anna's hand in his. 'And I couldn't be happier. Finally, I have something to live for again.'

'Life starts now,' Anna agreed. John nodded, absent-mindedly squeezing her hand in his before she spoke again. 'Did you have anything planned for today?'

'I thought I'd take you for a walk around the village,' John suggested as he poured himself a cup of tea. 'I've asked the ladies at the bakery if they would prepare me a small picnic and I thought we could have that for lunch by the brook a ten minute walk from here.'

'The ladies at the bakery, eh?' Anna said, raising her eyebrows at John who was smiling brightly. 'You'll have to be careful, with all these ladies you've been chatting to I might get a little bit jealous.'

John leant forward on his elbows and took both of Anna's hands in his own. 'From the moment I met you, every other woman pales in insignificance.'

'You are so wonderful,' Anna cooed, leaning forward herself and brushing her lips lightly against John's.

'Even if the women in question are skilled pastry chefs.' John continued.

'So that's the real way to your heart is it, John Bates?' Anna asked. 'Food?'

'I am partial to the odd pie, yes.'

'I can make pie.' Anna protested. 'It will be the first thing I shall make for you when we move into the cottage. And very nice it will taste too.'

'My darling, if you're beautiful hands have made it then I don't doubt that.'

* * *

Shortly after they had finished breakfast, John was waiting in the alley outside the back door of the public house, Anna having gone upstairs to prepare herself for their outing into the local village. So this was what happiness felt like. John could say in all honestly he had never felt this way about a woman before. Seeing Anna walk into the tea shop the previous day was the most incredible moment of his life. Feeling her breath in his ear as she slept leant against him on the train was a sensation unlike any other he had experienced. Placing the ring on her finger last night was magical, although he wished with every fibre of his being it was real. Still, they were together and officially married or not, Anna had promised her life to him. And her word was worth more to him than a piece of paper. No one knew them here. John was looking forward to building a life from scratch with the woman with whom he wished to spend the rest of it with. Vera had no idea where they were, nothing could possibly get in their way.

'What are you thinking about?' Anna asked coyly, stepping out into the street. John turned to look at her, instantly smiling as his eyes met Anna's.

'Nothing really,' John shrugged as Anna linked her arms through his.

Walking in silence until they reached the end of the alley, they stopped as they took in the sight before him. A busy village, perfect strangers going about their daily business. The post office was a hive of activity, clearly the centre of the community. The small butchers clearly did a roaring trade, Anna watching as they accepted a rather large delivery, one that would serve the butcher's in Downton for a whole month. With the weather being pleasantly warm, some locals were partaking of a cream tea whilst sitting at one of the tables outside the tea rooms. Anna was thinking that John had made a good choice, finding this little haven for them to start a life together in.

'So, where would you like to go first?' John asked, smiling down at Anna as her eyes darted here, there and everywhere.

'I don't mind, I'm just taking it all in,' Anna replied as they began to walk. She sighed contentedly, tightening her grip on John's arm. 'This is nice.'

'It certainly is that,' John agreed, stroking Anna's hand that was gripping his arm. They reached the post office, John leading Anna inside.

'Ahh, look. It's George's cousin,' the lady behind the counter said as John and Anna entered.

'John, what can we do you for?' An older gentleman asked, appearing from the back room.

'Nothing Peter, I just wanted to introduce someone.' John began, looking behind him at Anna. He gently tugged on her hand to bring Anna closer before turning his attentions back to Peter. 'You remember I said someone would be joining me. Well, this is Anna, my wife.'

As soon as the words were out of his mouth, John had looked back to meet Anna's gaze. The smile on her face was a picture. Her eyes began to fill with unshed tears as John's words reverberated around her head. My wife. She looked so blissful. That John could be the one who made her so happy filled his heart with joy.

'Nice to meet you, Anna.' Peter said politely, holding a hand for Anna to shake.

'Likewise,' Anna replied, bowing her head slightly as she shook Peter's hand.

'A Yorkshire lassie,' Peter recognised from Anna's tone of voice.

'That's right,' Anna smiled. 'Born and bred. Is it that obvious?'

'It is to me,' Peter nodded. 'My mum was from Yorkshire. I love the sound of the accent, takes me back to my childhood, so it does.'

'I love the sound of it as well,' John said, raising his eyebrows at Anna with a smirk. She grinned, meeting his eyes again before Peter continued speaking.

'So, if John is Irish how did you two come to meet? Newlyweds, aren't ya?'

'Yes, we've been married a little over a month now.' John replied quickly before looking in Anna's direction. 'Would you like to tell the story of how we met, darling?'

Anna's eyes lit up before she responded. 'No, You can, John. You tell it so much better than I do. My husband has such a talent for telling stories.'

Starling blankly at Anna, her face an amused expression, John furrowed his brow as he wondered what game she was playing. He couldn't tell the truth, they didn't know who the people around here might know. John would have to fabricate a meeting, his expression lifted suddenly.

'Alright,' John nodded before looking at Peter again. 'It's quite a simple story really. It was an April morning, the morning after the Titanic was lost to be exact. I had arrived in this new town, knew no one and was a bit of a mess really. Then, whilst exploring the local village, mine and Anna's eyes met over a crowded tea room, and I knew my life was never going to be the same again. She worked there you see. I must have drunk gallons of tea, eaten my own weight in cream cakes just so I could see this beautiful woman over and over again. Finding out she liked me too seemed improbable, but that was how it was. It took me a while to get her, but I did. And now I don't ever intend on letting her go.'

Silence reigned, Anna and John sharing a smile before a woman came bounding into the post office. 'Has my parcel arrived yet, Peter?'

'Let me check, Agnes.' Peter replied, disappearing into the back.

'Hello Mr Bates,' Agnes smiled.

'Agnes,' John nodded his head in response.

'Here we go, Agnes. It came this morning,' Peter began as Agnes approached the counter to stand beside Anna. 'Here, are you still looking for some help at the tea rooms?'

'Oh yes,' Agnes sighed. 'Since Harriet left we have been run off our feet.'

'Then I have the answer,' Peter triumphantly announced, gesturing towards Anna. Agnes looked at Anna, before looking up at John. 'This must be your wife, Mr Bates.'

'Yes, how did you know?'

'Well, you talked about and described her in that much detail it's pretty obvious,' Agnes answered.

'She worked in a tea room.' Peter continued. 'The answer to your prayers.'

'Oh, I'm not really sure...'

'The pay is good. For around here anyway,' Agnes interrupted Anna. 'We could arrange a trial pretty easily.'

'I don't know what...'

'Anna will think about it,' John said. Anna looked up at him, scowling in a playful manner. 'Won't you, darling?'

'Well, let me know what you decide.' Agnes muttered before taking her parcel and leaving the post office.

'Good day to you, Peter.' John smiled, taking Anna by the hand and leading her back outside. John was laughing as Anna followed him before stopping to face her.

'John Bates, now everyone thinks I have the experience to be a waitress in a tea room.' Anna exclaimed.

'The story was romantic though.'

'That's neither here nor there.'

'Come on, Anna. You worked in service for half of your life. You'll just be serving the general public instead of the aristocracy.' John said in his defence. 'Besides, you would like to work, wouldn't you?'

'Yes, I suppose so,' Anna sighed before looking John in the eye. A grin played on her lips. 'You remember the first time we met.'

'Of course I do,' John nodded as he continued to walk. 'And it's true. My life hasn't been the same since.'

* * *

John took Anna to meet the local shopkeepers, just so that they would recognise her when she visited their shops to buy provisions for the cottage. Whilst being introduced to the ladies in the bakery, Anna watched on highly amused as all four workers seemed to hang on John's every word. One seemed particularly friendly, Anna remembered her name to be Elizabeth. She would gently rub John's arm when he said something she found funny, which seemed to be every word he said. As the person in charge of the bakery, Marion, left to fetch the picnic that had been prepared, John looked over his shoulder at Anna who raised her eyebrows suspiciously at him.

'So where are you taking this very fortunate young lady on a picnic then, Mr Bates?' Elizabeth asked, casting an eye in Anna's direction.

Taking a few steps towards Anna, John had recognised that she appeared to be a little left out of the conversation. He placed a hand on the small of her back before continuing. 'Well, I can't tell you that, it's a surprise.'

'I'm sure it will be beautiful, wherever it is,' Anna remarked, looking up at John. 'The countryside around here is breathtaking.'

'You're very lucky to have such a wonderful husband, Mrs Bates.' Elizabeth continued before looking John up and down. 'It's just a shame someone else got to him first.'

'Here we go, Mr Bates.' Marion arrived back carrying a hamper. 'We'll need the basket back but there's no hurry.'

'Thank you, Marion,' John smiled as he took the hamper from her.

'No hurry at all,' Elizabeth added, grazing her hand against John's arm once more. Marion looked on as Anna watched Elizabeth almost man handle her husband in the middle of the bakery.

'Betty, go through to the back and check on those currant buns,' Marion instructed, clearly embarrassed by Elizabeth's behaviour. 'Now please.'

With a clearly audible huff, Elizabeth did as she was asked and trudged behind the counter and through to the back room where Marion had just been. Marion laughed awkwardly as John had begun to turn a shade of crimson.

'Sorry,' Marion apologised. 'Not meaning to crush your ego, Mr Bates. But she's like that with all male newcomers.'

'Mr Bates isn't used to all this female attention,' Anna said. 'Isn't that right, Mr Bates?'

John cleared his throat. 'How much will that be for the picnic?'

* * *

Not able to stop laughing for a considerable amount of the distance from the bakery to the brook a few minutes walk away, Anna clearly enjoyed the awkwardness caused by the young lady in the bakery. Stopping on the river bank, Anna laid out the blanket they had fetched before sitting down.

'There's no need to be, but I thought you were jealous at first,' John remarked with a jovial lilt to his tone, slowly lowering himself so he was beside Anna. His comment only caused Anna to laugh once more. 'What? The way you looked at me was with pure jealousy in your eyes.'

'Believe whatever you want, Mr Bates, I was simply finding the whole situation entertaining,' Anna managed to say through her laughter. She had to admit to herself she was enjoying the friendly banter they were sharing, something that she always had enjoyed. He was so serious for the majority of the time, it was rare for him to show his playful side. Anna was determined to make the most of it. 'She's certainly very forward. That Elizabeth.'

'And very pretty too.' John replied without thinking. He looked at Anna whose mouth was wide open in shock, although her eyes gave away her still light hearted demeanour.

'Very pretty? Really, Mr Bates.' Anna teased. 'I ask you. After moving up here to be with you, as well. All the time we've been apart you've been flirting with the local girls. I just won't have it.'

'I can't help it,' John continued, taking one of the packages out of the basket and beginning to untie it. 'If the ladies find me irresistible.'

Anna was laughing hysterically now as John opened the package. It warmed his heart to see Anna so cheerful. Taking a sandwich, he took a bite as he waited for Anna's response.

'Alright, Mr Bates. Whatever you say.'

'Is it really that hard to believe? You fell for me, didn't you? And look at you.'

'What do you mean, look at me?' Anna asked, her laughter slowing but still her smile remained. She took the package from John and began to look through the sandwiches that were contained inside.

'What I mean is, you're absolutely stunning,' John said through a mouthful of his sandwich. Anna looked up from the sandwiches to meet John's eyes with her own. 'No one else in this village, in the entire world in fact could compare to you. So it is plausible that a girl like Elizabeth would find a crippled old man like me attractive. I mean, if you did.'

'That was beautiful, what you just said. Until you added in the last bit about you being a crippled old man.'

'I am crippled.' John shrugged, lifting up his cane to emphasise his point before finishing the rest of his sandwich in one bite.

In the next moment, Anna was on her hands and knees before crawling in John's direction. Time seemed to stand still as he watched Anna come nearer before she straddled him, her knees either side of his. John's breath caught in his throat as Anna placed both of her hands on either side of his face.

'You, John Bates are the most kind hearted, most perfect man to ever walk the face of the earth. Don't you ever let me hear you say those words again. You got your injury fighting in the war. I will not have you belittle yourself in spite of your bravery. Do I make myself clear?'

'Yes,' John breathed before brushing hip lips against Anna's, his hands resting on the small of her back. 'Perfectly.'

'Right,' Anna replied, satisfied with her actions before moving over to her side of the blanket again, disappointing John slightly with their loss of contact.

John fought hard to regulate his breathing as Anna began to eat. It wasn't lost on him that what had just happened was the closest he and Anna had ever been. He had dreamt of being in that situation with Anna, with her positioned above him, looking deeply into her eyes. Still, proprietary shook those thoughts from his mind. He had promised himself he wouldn't force the situation with Anna. John had all the time in the world for her, and that was the least she deserved.

'I was going to ask, if it would be alright to keep in contact with Mrs Hughes.' Anna asked. 'She requested we let her know of how our situation pans out.'

'I shouldn't see why not,' John nodded. 'She and Mr Carson sort the post before anyone else, so there's no reason your letters should fall into the wrong hands.'

No more words were spoken, both eating, enjoying the comfort that being together brought and the peaceful noises that only the countryside can offer. As they both finished their lunch, a thought entered John's mind, a memory from their morning together.

'I shall be starting in the pub soon after we move into the cottage,' John explained. 'George has already started showing me the ropes.'

'Right,' Anna nodded. 'Do you like it? The work I mean.'

'Well, it's a job isn't it,' John replied indifferently. 'All I'm saying is we will manage, you don't have to work. But if you wanted to take Agnes up on her offer, then please do. Whatever makes you happy.'

Anna smiled before taking John's hand in her own. 'I might. I need to work, that much is for sure. For the time being anyway.'

'How do you mean?'

'Well, Mr Bates,' Anna began, moving closer to him. 'If things go how they do normally between married couples, soon enough I might not be in a position to work.'

John narrowed his gaze at Anna until her words suddenly made sense. She was talking about starting a family. He would by lying if he said he hadn't thought about it. Becoming a father, but not just any. The father to Anna's children. The joy it would bring her, knowing he played a part in making her so happy. However, the situation was entirely different now.

'How soon... I mean when. You know Anna...'

'What are you trying to say, Mr Bates? Just say it, it's me.'

'How soon would like to have children?' John asked. 'I mean, this isn't the conventional way to do it. And I thought with circumstances being as they are you may...'

Anna stopped his flow of speech by placing a finger on his lips. 'We are going to spend the rest of our lives together. To hell with convention. All that matters is you love me, and I love you. We are the only people who know the truth. And George, but he won't give us away. We are going to be living as a married couple, we should act like one and think like one.'

'I know you're right,' John replied.

'Because I am. Think about it this way. Couples forced together into loveless marriages bring children into this world because they feel it's their duty, what they have to do. We aren't married, but the love we share means we are together through choice, not duty or expectation. I know which family I would rather be born into.'

'I love the way you think. About us. About life in general. I don't know what I ever did to deserve the love you give me.'

'In answer to your question about children, John.' Anna replied, not dignifying his previous statement with an answer before stroking his face. 'As soon as we are ready.'

'I shall look forward to it.'

* * *

After returning to the pub, John's assistance was required as a celebration broke out. One of the locals had returned home after having been feared lost in the war. Nearly everyone had packed into The Swan to toast the young man's homecoming. Helping out for an hour soon turned into the whole afternoon as George staged a lock in. Anna loved the sense of community amongst everybody, she and John welcomed into it with open arms.

The barman George already employed, Harold, arrived in the evening. John was relieved of his duties and joined Anna at a table she had been holding court at whilst John was busy. He had watched her intently as she chatted to anyone and everyone, so happy and full of life. He could scarcely believe this woman had chosen to be here with him. It just didn't seem real.

As the evening turned into the early hours, the piano in the corner of the pub had seen much usage, a few of the local community trying their hand out on the old instrument. Sitting in the corner, allowing those who knew him to toast the brave young man on his return, Anna and John spent their time conversing with the soldier whose name was Samuel.

John shared stories of his own experiences at war, enlightening Samuel that his knee was injured whilst saving the life of a fellow soldier. John had never told Anna this, only that he had been injured fighting the Boer's. John didn't name the soldier he had saved, but Anna speculated it was Lord Grantham. There was something between the two of them, a bond formed between the old comrades that could only be born out of experiencing certain things side by side.

As Samuel made his excuses, his father calling him over to sing beside the piano, John settled his back against the wall beside the table they were sitting at. Taking her quite by surprise, John pulled Anna to settle against him, his arm protectively around her waist.

'What's gotten into you?' Anna asked with a slight chuckle, settling her back against John's front.

'Well, I can hold you like this here and no one will bat an eyelid,' John whispered in Anna's ear. 'If it's alright with you, of course.'

'Yes,' Anna said breathlessly, gripping John's arm with her hands. 'How did you find playing the barman?'

'It wasn't too bad, I'm going to have to get used to it.' John replied, enjoying the sensation of Anna's body in close proximity to his.

'Can I get you lovebirds another drink?' George asked, wiping the table adjacent to Anna and John.

'I think I'm going to go up in a minute,' Anna replied, watching the circular motions George was making with his cloth intently. 'Still suffering the effects of that train journey yesterday.'

'Very well. John?'

'I'll probably do the same, once we've had some dinner of course.'

'Oh, dinner,' Anna exclaimed. 'I completely forgot. It's been such a lovely afternoon.'

'It has, you've certainly made an impression Anna.' George continued, now standing in front of them. 'I think you're the breath of fresh air this place needs. Anyway, there's a pie in the larder if you're hungry. Just save me a bit for when I'm done in here.'

* * *

'Oh for goodness sake,' Anna cursed as she knelt down in front of the fireplace, trying to get it lit. She had insisted when John told her he would do it that she could manage. That had been forty five minutes ago.

Looking over her shoulder, Anna took in the bed behind her. It looked so cold, so uninviting. Last night it had been a blessed relief, the train journey having taken it's toll, Anna was so tired she felt like she would have fallen asleep on the floor. Added to this that the fire was already lit, it seemed perfect the previous evening. Now it was cold. Very cold. Closing her eyes, Anna imagined how much warmer it would be with John's arms around her, like how they were downstairs earlier. He had taken her by surprise, but it was very welcome indeed.

Sighing, Anna stood up and admitted defeat. She contemplated going to disturb John to light the fire for her. Anna knew he wouldn't mind. The truth was, even though they had only been apart a short time, Anna was missing him. Now they had spent time together uninterrupted, Anna didn't want that time to end.

Walking to the door before her courage left her, she tied the cord on her dressing gown before stepping outside into the corridor. The first sound she heard was that of George in the living area downstairs. Despite the fact her intentions were innocent enough, George might not see it that way. Although George was comfortable with the situation, he might not appreciate John and Anna sharing a room under his roof. For a split second, Anna thought about turning back before a realisation came over her. She and John had waited years to be together. All Anna wanted was to be held by the man she loved for the entire night, nothing else. Not yet.

Deciding to continue on with her plan, the next thing Anna knew her hand was forming a fist, ready to knock on John's door. Anna listened as the room remained silent. He must have been asleep. Anna thought to herself, for someone who complained about not sleeping well, judging by his snoring last night and not answering the door now, he certainly fell asleep quickly.

Not wishing to be denied, her mind certainly made up now, Anna opened the door slowly. Looking to the bed, she saw John sitting upright, glasses on, the lamp beside him illuminating a book he had dropped to his lap in his slumbering state. She smiled to herself before stepping inside the room and closing the door carefully behind her. He didn't stir. Tiptoeing closer to the bed, she sat beside him and simply stared. He looked so gorgeous, her heart skipped a beat.

Obviously feeling a presence beside him, John opened his eyes slightly. Anna's breath hitched at his actions, bringing her out of her daydreaming. She wasn't expecting him to wake up.

'Anna,' John said sleepily, sitting up in bed and removing his glasses. 'Is everything alright?'

'I couldn't light the fire,' Anna replied.

'Do you want me to come and do it?'

'No,' Anna answered, taking John's book and placing it on the nightstand beside them before discarding her dressing gown and throwing it on the chair in the corner of the room. 'Just budge up.'

'I'm sorry?' It was too late for John to protest, Anna was already pulling back the covers. John moved over slightly as Anna sat on the edge of the bed before manoeuvring her legs next to John's.

'Now that I've had you all to myself with no disruptions, I miss you.' Anna admitted, looking down at John's confused expression. 'This won't make your leg uncomfortable, will it?'

'No I hardly notice it when I'm with you,' John replied honestly, still confused. 'But I thought you wanted to wait, until we...'

'All I want is a cuddle, Mr Bates.' Anna said as John turned on his side. Realising it was the only way they were going to fit comfortably in the single bed, Anna did the same. John placed his arm underneath the pillow, his other arm firmly around Anna's waist, his hand finding the small of Anna's back.

'You're just a troublemaker,' John smiled as Anna made herself uncomfortable. 'What would George say if he found us like this?'

'What he doesn't know won't kill him,' Anna replied, resting her hand on John's cheek before her fingers found the softness of his brown hair. 'I've waited so long for this. To lie next to you.'

John hummed his agreement as he fingers made trails on Anna's back. 'I could easily kiss you, you know.'

'I'm not stopping you.'

Moving his lips closer to Anna's, John kissed her lightly at first. Anna responded by tugging on his hair with a little more force until the kiss became more passionate. John's hand moved Anna a little closer to him as he deepened the kiss. Anna's groan at his movements brought John back to his senses. He certainly wouldn't give in to his desires here. Anna deserved more than a cramped bed above a pub. George deserved more than to be deceived in this way.

Pulling away, albeit reluctantly, John looked deeply into Anna's eyes. 'You are so beautiful, I love you so much.'

'I love you too.'

'Turn over,' John whispered, leaning back as he gave Anna room to follow his instructions. 'It will be more comfortable if I hold you with your back to me.'

As soon as Anna had followed this through, John's arm was around her waist, strong and firm. Anna wrapped her own arm around his.

'I could get used to this,' Anna cooed, arching her back into John.

'Me too,' John agreed. 'And soon we will do. This is it how it will be each and every night. Then waking up next to each other in the morning. I'm looking forward to that.'

'Me too, but let's sleep first, eh?' Anna replied, her voice suddenly sounding very tired.

'Sounds like a plan,' John said with a yawn. 'Night my love.'

Anna didn't answer, already asleep, content in John's arms.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N- Rating moves up to M with a bump. I have re written this _5 times_. I'm still not happy with it but realise I haven't updated for a while. Thanks for your reviews and follows :**)

**Disclaimer:** Downton belongs to Julian Fellowes.

* * *

Two weeks passed relatively quietly, Anna and John taking the time to get to know each other in their new circumstances. Picnics, long walks and anything where they could revel in each other's company were high on the agenda. John was so much more laid back in their new surroundings, free to be himself. Even though she thought she had known most things about John and his behaviour, Anna had learnt about some idiosyncrasies she hadn't noticed before. For instance, the way his hands would flail when he was trying to justify an argument, as if on their own merry dance. Anna had thought John was attractive from the moment she laid eyes on him, however, not having to bow to proprietary and duty meant John would wear his hair unkempt, pomade free. Every so often a strand of hair would become loose above his right eye. She would watch transfixed as John brushed it back into place. This simplest of actions did something to Anna that she couldn't explain. Emotions stirred within her that she had never felt before.

John just couldn't believe his luck, his good fortune. Anna had chosen to be with him and the reality far surpassed his dreams. She was stunning, eloquent, beautiful. Often he'd find himself simply staring at her, never fully understanding why someone like her would willingly want to be with him. John had promised himself that he would spend each day making sure Anna knew how much she meant to him. In the evenings before they went their separate ways into their separate bedrooms, he told Anna how much he loved her, and how he eagerly he was anticipating their new life together. John saw her as his angel, sent down to light up his life, to make everything worthwhile.

Anna had written to Mrs Hughes, explaining she and John were very happy and looking forward to their future together. Although not the conventional way to live their lives, Anna said that she hoped Mrs Hughes understood why they made the break to be together. The thought of letting John go that night chilled Anna to the bone. That she would never see him again left her feeling desolate and empty. This was right. Her honour was a small sacrifice for Anna to live this way with the man she truly loved.

Taking Agnes up on her offer of a trial at the tea room, Anna found the work agreeable and the ladies she would be working with were friendly and grateful of her assistance. Anna was offered a job there and then, she gladly accepted. John had insisted that Anna needn't work, his wage along with using the money his mother had left him wisely would more than suffice. However, he respected Anna's wishes. She had been a working woman for over half her life and she would grow tiresome of staying at home in their cottage day after day. Until she was in a position where she wasn't able to work, she would like an occupation of some kind.

The day Anna and John had been waiting for had arrived. George came bounding into the living quarters of the public house, disturbing the peace that had fallen as Anna and John sat in front of the fire in the sitting room. Jangling keys to make his point, he threw them in John's direction, he having to think fast to skilfully pluck them from the air.

'Keys. To your home.' George moved to stand beside the mantelpiece, in front of the fire. 'The McArthurs left this afternoon. It's all ready for you.'

'Really?' Anna sat forward, excitement building within her. 'We can move in right away?'

'Indeed, young Anna,' George replied.

John stood up and bounded towards his cousin, his hand outstretched to offer his cousin a handshake. 'I really don't know how to thank you.'

'There's no need. Really.' George began to take off his blazer and walking to the table, hung it on the back of one of the chairs. 'John, I was thinking I'd give you the weekend to get settled. Then you could start on Monday?'

John nodded, fiddling with the keys in his hands whilst sharing a smile with Anna.

'Right, well I better go through and help Harold.' George announced. 'I just wanted to share with you the good news.'

'Thank you, George,' Anna called after him as walked towards the door. 'Not just for the cottage, but for being supportive. We wouldn't be in this position if it wasn't for you.'

George smiled before leaving the room. Anna's eyes met John's once more. Without a word Anna stood, closing the gap between herself and John and wrapping her arms around his shoulders. Their foreheads rested against the others as John's arms snaked their way around Anna's waist.

'Our home,' John breathed. 'I just can't believe it. I prayed this day would come, and now it has it...'

Not able to continue with his words, emotions overwhelmed John as he pulled Anna closer into his embrace. Anna was crying too, the enormity of the situation rendering both of them speechless.

'Hmm, Mr Bates. I'm afraid it looks like you have missed a bit.'

* * *

The next morning, Anna and John set about moving into their cottage. They were lucky, the cottage was fully furnished and everything was fairly new. George had renovated the cottage a few years previously meaning the furniture was still in good, working condition. All Anna and John would need was soft furnishings, which they purchased from a nearby town that morning.

To make it truly theirs, Anna insisted they give the sitting room a lick of paint. It didn't really require a new coat, but John didn't have the heart to quash her enthusiasm. Fortunately, George had a vast array of colours to choose from in his shed, Anna choosing a simple magnolia, not wanting anything too fancy. Once painting supplies had been purchased from the hardware store a few doors down from the pub, Saturday afternoon was being spent painting the walls of the sitting room.

'Well, I do apologise, my love.' John replied, squinting to try and see where on the wall Anna could possibly mean. Reaching over his shoulder, Anna painted the area she believed needed some attention before moving away. John shook his head, smiling gently as he watched Anna continue her side of the room.

'I've finished,' John stood back and admired his handy work. Turning around, he walked towards Anna as she closely scrutinised her endeavours. 'Is it beginning to feel a bit more like home?'

'Yes,' Anna nodded, putting her hands on her hips, John then finding it too tempting not to wrap his arms around her waist. She sighed, arching her back into John's touch. 'Mainly because you are here with me, though.'

'Would you like to check my painting is up to your impeccable standards?' John asked, stepping aside to allow Anna to move across the room to run her critical eye over his wall.

'I'm sorry Mr Bates, this just won't do,' Anna announced, stepping away and reaching for the brush John had left in his tin of paint. 'You missed another bit.'

As Anna set about going over the parts of the wall she believed John had missed, an idea played over in his mind. Looking behind him, he eyed Anna's paint brush sitting precariously on a sheet covered side table. Gently moving towards it, he took it in his grasp before dipping the bristles in Anna's paint. As she was still busy focussing on the wall, John tiptoed behind Anna, resting his head on her shoulder, his hands behind his back.

'I didn't miss too much, did I?' John asked, mock annoyance in his tone.

'No, I'm just a perfectionist when it comes to these sort of things.' Anna began pointing at the wall. 'But you did miss here. And here. And there actually...'

'And here,' John interrupted Anna by painting a stripe down the side of her face, Anna gasping as the cold liquid began to trickle down her cheek and onto her neck. John was laughing as Anna turned to face him, her mouth wide open in shock.

'I can't believe you just did that.'

'Did you think I was going to just let you stand there criticising my hard work?' John replied, smiling wickedly and finding Anna's response to his actions highly amusing.

'I wasn't criticising, I was simply making sure the wall was covered,' Anna took a rag which was resting on the ladder beside her, wiping her face before her lips turned upwards into a smile. John noticed her look down at the paint brush in her hand. 'Two can play this game.'

'Come on, Anna. Don't do anything silly.' John took a few steps back as Anna moved towards him, her fully loaded paint brush outstretched in his direction.

'Not scared, are you Mr Bates?'

Both stood, squaring up to each other. For this not to turn into a full blown fight, John realised he was going to have to take matters into his own hands. Making a dash, he grabbed Anna by the wrists, his strength completely overwhelming her. Both were laughing as John pushed Anna towards a wall which had been painted much earlier.

'That's not fair,' Anna squealed in-between her laughter. 'You're so much stronger than me.'

'Alls fair in love and war,' John growled, closing the distance between them by brushing his lips softly against Anna's.

Taking her paintbrush, John made to move away before Anna grabbed him by the arm and pulled John back towards her.

'Where do you think your going?' She breathed, her eyes half lidded as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. 'Kiss me again.'

John obliged, covering Anna's mouth with his own. Without much reluctance, Anna allowed John to deepen the kiss, both paintbrushes dropping to the floor as John's hands took possession of Anna's waist. Feeling his desire heightening, John broke away from Anna, both their breathing haggard as he sought out her gaze.

'Anna, we have to stop...'

'Why?'

He had no reply. The obvious explanation was something they couldn't do anything about. Something they had both agreed to disregard in order to be together as a man and wife should. Nothing was stopping them. John smiled softly, his heart beating wildly as Anna reciprocated.

'Are you sure?' John asked, pressing his lips softly to Anna's.

Suddenly, a knock at the door brought them out of their trance like states, John stepping backwards erratically. Looking to the door, Anna followed his line of sight. The door knocked again.

'I'll answer it.' John said, walking out of the sitting room and disappearing into the hallway. Anna listened as George's jovial tone filled the air.

Still trying to regulate her breathing, she bent down and picked up the paintbrushes as John returned, followed by his cousin.

'Blimey Anna, what happened to your face?' George asked, Anna's face still slightly smeared in the paint John had put there.

'I...I...' Anna stumbled.

'It's alright, you don't have to explain yourself. I just came to say that I had a surprise this morning. It was lucky the cottage became available when it did because Jack has turned up this morning.'

'Our cousin, Jack?'

'Yes, I wrote to him to say you were coming up to live here, he didn't think twice in coming over to see you. Especially when I told him you were newly married, having finally gotten rid of that Vera. He's going to be staying for a couple of weeks.' George explained before turning his attentions to Anna. 'Look, I know it's your first night in your new home but I thought you might like to come over and say hello. This evening.'

'Oh, I don't know...'

'It's fine,' Anna interrupted John, smiling broadly. 'We'd love to.'

'Are you sure?' John asked.

'Yes, he's come all this way to see you and meet your new wife. We can't let him down, can we?'

'I suppose not,' John smiled. 'We'll be over about seven.'

'Grand,' George replied as he walked towards the door. 'I'll warn you now, Anna. He's a whizz on the old piano. Bring your singing voice.'

John showed George out before walking back into the sitting room. 'I'm sorry about that.'

'It's perfectly alright,' Anna insisted before stroking John's cheek with her index finger. 'We've got plenty of time for such matters.'

'I've got all the time in the world for you, my love.'

* * *

'So, whereabouts is your vineyard, Jack?' Anna enquired as Jack brought everyone present another round of drinks.

'California,' Jack replied, handing George some money. 'The weather is beautiful almost every day. Much different climate to Scotland, obviously.'

'I can imagine,' Anna smiled, her eyes closely studying Jack.

He was so different to his cousins. Whereas George and John were dark in their features, Jack was very much blonde hair and blue eyes, his appearance reminded her of a somewhat older Mr Matthew back at Downton. His suit was beige, his tie light blue and he had a slight tan, no doubt due to his time spent in the Californian sun. Jack owned a vineyard, his brand of wine was one of the biggest sellers in America. A self made man, he had the respect of both of his cousins and rightly so. Not only was he a successful businessman, he was charming to go with it. Generous to a fault, he happily dished out drinks to those around him, happy to share his fortune with those who had been there for him when he grew up around these parts.

'Anna, are you having a nice evening?' John asked, appearing by her side, his hand on the small of her back. Whilst Anna was busy getting acquainted with Jack, John had been surrounded by the ladies from the bakery. He had managed to escape briefly to enquire about his wife's well being.

'John, you seem to be quite the ladies man,' Jack chuckled, looking over at Marion chiding Elizabeth over her flirting with John.

'Really, I'm not,' John replied, looking back over his shoulder, smiling weakly as Elizabeth waved at him before turning back to Anna and Jack.

'You'd think the novelty would have worn off by now,' Anna commented, taking a sip of her drink before continuing. 'What, with you no longer being the new man in town'

'The others are alright, it's Elizabeth who is a little too friendly. If its bothering you, I can make my excuses and be at your side. I just didn't want to seem rude.'

'It's perfectly fine,' Anna replied before moving a little closer to John so only he could hear. 'Just remember who you are taking home tonight.'

'As if I could forget.'

'John, why don't you join me for a sing song at the piano?' Jack suggested, lighting up a cigarette.

'God no,' John laughed.

'Come on. It will be just like the old days. We used to have many a good night that lasted well until the wee hours. Besides, it must be better than rejoining that rabble over there. '

John looked over his shoulder before thinking his cousin could quite possibly be right.

'Go on then. But nothing too strenuous.'

With a wink to Anna, John followed Jack to the piano.

* * *

After leaving those at the pub still in high spirits, John and Anna finally managed to excuse themselves as the clock chimed ten o clock. He noticed she was a little tentative in her movements, taking in a deep breath as she locked her arm with John's. Reaching their cottage, anticipation filled the air as John opened the door. Nothing was said as he allowed Anna to enter first, stepping aside and breathing in her scent as she crossed the threshold. Slowly following her inside, he mentally reassured himself that if anything happened tonight, it would all be on Anna's terms, at her pace. She took off her coat, hanging it on the rack beside the door as John did the same. Their gaze met, John smiled but this time Anna didn't respond in kind.

'I'll meet you in the bedroom, if that's alright,' Anna asked, her voice shaking slightly. 'I fancy a bath.'

'Whatever you want,' John nodded. 'I'll lock up down here and see you in a little while then.'

'Yes,' Anna forced a smile although the look in her eyes gave her nervous state away. With a nod of the head, John watched Anna disappear upstairs.

She was pensive, and had every right to be although John's mind was going into overdrive. Anna had seemed so keen to pursue things this afternoon before George had interrupted. Thinking on as he secured the cottage downstairs, John made his way slowly in the direction Anna had just gone. Once in the bedroom, he lit the lamps on either side of the bed before making his way to retrieve his bedclothes. After getting changed into his pyjama bottoms and leaving his undershirt on, he made his way under the covers, a coldness filled the air that he couldn't wait to be out of. Now properly in bed, he looked beside him, to where Anna would soon be joining him. Looking beyond the bed, he saw her clothes piled neatly on the chair.

Suddenly, his attention was drawn to footsteps coming from the corridor, getting louder until the door opened slowly. Anna appeared, her dressing gown hanging over her arm, her hair up as she closed the door behind her. She smiled weakly at John, hanging her dressing gown on the back of the door before moving towards the bed.

'Room for a little one?' She asked, a nervous laugh following her words.

'Of course.' John folded back the covers, allowing Anna to slip underneath them. Although the temptation was there, he waited for a moment before reaching out to touch her.

'It's freezing.'

'It certainly is.' John agreed as Anna made herself comfortable. Turning her head to look at him, she shifted her entire body so she was lying on her side. Her voice still held an insecure tone. 'Aren't you going to hold me?'

'I was waiting for you to get settled,' John replied truthfully, mirroring Anna's position and shifting onto his side. He entwined his hand with Anna's, his index finger gently rubbing the gold band on her ring finger. John was conscious of the fact he was the limit to her experience. 'Anna, just because we are sharing a bed doesn't mean anything has to happen tonight. I meant what I said earlier. I have all the time in the world for you.'

'No, I want this to happen. Really I do.' John wasn't convinced but before he could argue, Anna was talking again. 'I just don't want to be a disappointment.'

John furrowed his brow in response. How could Anna possibly think she could be a disappointment to John was beyond him. He let go of Anna's hand and moved it to rest on her hip. 'My darling, you are all I have ever wanted. Don't ever think you could disappoint me.'

'It's just, you are experienced when it comes to this sort of thing. And well, you know I have never...'

'Believe me, Anna. This will be something new for both of us. I haven't been with a woman for a very long time. Especially not someone as beautiful as you.' John laughed as a thought entered his mind. 'I hope I am not a let down for you.'

The relief was overwhelming as the sound of Anna's own laughter filled his ears. However, the atmosphere turned decidedly more serious in an instant as Anna shifted closer to John, her hand finding the side of his face, her fingers gently stroking his hair.

'I know we aren't man and wife in the eyes of society, or God even.' Anna whispered, John's gaze focussed intently on her face. 'But I'm ready to become your wife in every other sense.'

'I just hope one day to be worthy of you,' John replied, brushing his lips against Anna's. She responded eagerly, putting her hand on the back of John's head and pulling him more closer to her.

They stayed this way for a moment, holding each other close and enjoying the closeness, the freedom to touch each other unbidden as they shared gentle kisses. John shivered as he realised there were not many barriers to hold him back, just Anna's nightdress and her underwear. His touches were no bolder then his hand resting on the small of his back, but the anticipation was almost too much to bear. Anna's fingertips had been exploring John's forearm, running them along the skin gently, making the hairs there stand on end with each individual touch. He was so strong, the muscles contorting in his arm as he softly rubbed Anna's back. John's touch, even through the material of her nightdress, was setting Anna on fire. She was beginning to realise she needed to feel more. Pulling away, slightly breathless, John looked deep into Anna's eyes, his face lit up by a gentle smile. Anna stroked his cheek, herself breathless as she tried to find the words to request John take things further.

'John, I...' She began with a shaky voice, before losing her nerve completely.

'Anna, are you alright?' John replied, moving his hand to rub her shoulder. 'Would you like to stop?'

'No,' Anna didn't miss a beat with her response. 'I am just well and truly out of my depth.'

'Please Anna, I don't want you to ever feel like that with me.' John whispered, shifting ever so closer to Anna, his hand possessive at her waist.

'I need you to show me how,' Anna responded, her cheeks glowing a light shade of pink, a sight which John found so endearing.

Beginning to nod, he took a deep breath before speaking. 'Alright. If you are sure. Our situation is...'

'John, our situation is that you love me, and I love you. So we aren't officially married. We have promised our lives to each other, how can this be wrong?' Anna had suddenly found some confidence, the conviction to her tone convincing John she wanted to continue.

'I love you,' John breathed before gently pressing his lips to Anna's neck, she gasping out loud in response to the contact, an unfamiliar sensation in the pit of her stomach surprising her. 'The pace we go is entirely down to you. If you want me to stop, just let me know. I want you to be comfortable, Anna.'

'Alright.'

John met her lips with his once more, his hand once again moving to rest on the small of Anna's back. Anna allowed John to deepen the kiss, her own fingertips tangling themselves in John's hair. Tentatively, John began to move his hand downwards, bunching up her nightdress before reaching the hem. His knuckles brushed against the skin at the back of Anna's knees, causing her to start a little. John stilled his moments at once. Finding her gaze, John implored Anna with his eyes, attempts to speak fruitless as his heart thundered in his chest.

'No, please,' Anna pleaded, placing her hand over the one John had positioned by her knee. 'Carry on.'

John needed no more encouragement as his hand found it's way under Anna's nightdress, moving the material to gather at her waist, Anna squeezing her eyes shut as John softly caressed the skin on her outer thigh.

'How does this feel?' John asked, kissing Anna's jaw line as his hands continued to explore the skin at the top of Anna's leg.

'Wonderful,' Anna answered truthfully, instinct telling her to wrap her leg around John's hip.

John tugged on her nightdress. 'Would it be incredibly forward of me to request permission to remove this?'

Anna sat up in response, John moving with her. He took the gathered material in his grasp before pulling the nightdress over her head, Anna's body being revealed with every inch. It was if time had stopped as John drank in the view before him. He had never seen anything so beautiful, so breathtaking. Anna's body was flawless, more incredible than he had ever envisaged. Her skin was almost white, completely unblemished. Her breasts were perfectly formed, the rosy buds of her nipples changing form as the cool air around them reached her body. Throwing her nightdress in the direction of the chair on which Anna had rested her robe, John noticed Anna's eyes staring at the ceiling, that slight glow reaching her cheeks once again.

John encouraged Anna to lay back down before removing his undershirt. Feeling the need to move the situation along, for Anna's comfort as well as his own conscious, he decided to move so he was over Anna, his knees either side of hers, his hands flat on the mattress beside her shoulders keeping him upright.

'You are beautiful,' he whispered, leaning in to find Anna's neck with his lips. 'Every single inch of you.'

His breath hitched as Anna's fingers reached out to stroke the hair on John's chest, this new expanse of skin being revealed to her exciting her somewhat. He may have been observing her body closely, but she was responding in kind. Having been tortured for what seemed like an eternity by the strands of chest hair that were occasionally on show when he removed his collar, Anna was enjoying running her hands over John's chest. His shoulders were so broad and the top of his arms seemed just as strong as the forearms she had been exploring moments earlier. Allowing herself a glance downward, the first thing Anna noticed was the bulge at the front of John's pyjama bottoms. Anna understood how a man's body worked, to think she was having this effect on John thrilled her.

'I know,' John 's voice was accompanied by a small laugh. 'An old man's body.'

'Not at all. A real man's body is all I see before me.' Anna replied indignantly. 'You're perfect to me.'

'You flatter me.'

John placed his lips on Anna's chest, just above her breasts as he ghosted the knuckles on one of his hands down Anna's side, ever so slightly brushing the curve of her breast. Meeting her gaze, his touch became bolder as his palm came to rest over the top of her breast. Anna had never been touched so intimately, her reaction was magical to John as she pushed her head back against the pillow, her eyes half lidded. John took this as his invitation to increase his touch, squeezing ever so slightly before taking her nipple between his thumb and forefinger. His touch was making Anna feel so hot, so alive.

'Is this alright?' John's eyes focussed intently on Anna's face as he awaited her answer.

'Oh yes,' Anna groaned, taking herself by surprise. 'More. Please.'

Anna could feel a gentle throbbing down below, completely overwhelmed as John touched her in this way. She had never imagined their first time would have this affect on her. Wanting her to feel as much pleasure as possible, his own building desire was irrelevant to John. Running his fingers gently over Anna's stomach, he stopped as they reached the top of her underwear. As if they could read each other's thoughts, Anna rose her hips from the bed. In the next instance, John was pulling them down, over her legs before removing them completely. Dropping them on the floor, John began a trail of kisses from Anna's ankles and upward, her lower legs, past her knees before leaning his whole body over her once again. Anna's hands were now at the waistband of John's pyjama bottoms, willing them downward. John smiled as she succeeded before kicking the offending item off the rest of the way. As she turned her attentions to his own underwear, John gently took hold of her wrist.

'Not so fast,' he said softly. 'I want to make sure you are comfortable first.'

'I don't understand...'

Words escaped her then as John's fingers reached below her stomach, resting on the soft curls he found there. The throbbing sensation that had been building suddenly escalated, soft moans escaping from Anna as John edged his fingers ever closer to her core.

'Tell me to...'

'Don't stop,' Anna interrupted a cautious John.

John gently parted Anna's folds, his eyes focussed on her hers as he gently pushed his index finger inside her. Anna let out a hissing sound, John groaning at how wet she felt beneath his fingertips. Anna's eyes were tightly closed as John found the place she so desperately wanted him to be.

'Oh God, John,' Anna gasped as John applied gentle pressure to the sensitive bundle of nerves he had found. John felt his breath catch in his throat as Anna's hips began to lift off the bed, moving her hips in rhythm to his fingers.

Before too long, her hands was grabbing desperately at the bed sheets beneath her as John quickened his movements, burning the image of Anna in her current state to his memory. He had never seen a more erotic sight than that of Anna responding to his touch in this manner. Gentle waves of pleasure began to spread throughout Anna's body, becoming more intense with every stroke of John's fingers. She couldn't stop the noises escaping her as John drove her ever closer to her end. In the next moment, she was undone, it felt almost like an explosion at her core, the most intense pleasure she had ever felt.

Allowing Anna to regain her senses, John quickly removed his own underwear before resuming his position above Anna, gently kissing her neck as her breathing calmed. It took a few moments for her to realise John was now naked, his own arousal settled between her legs.

'I love you,' Anna whispered, kissing John on the cheek.

'God I love you,' John replied, resting his forehead against Anna's. 'So very much my darling. I hope that was alright for you. I wanted you to feel some pleasure before we continue.'

'Then you succeeded, Mr Bates,' Anna raised her eyebrows, a delicious smirk on her lips as John leant up to look in her eyes. 'You can go on now.'

'Only if you are ready Anna, I am still entirely at your mercy.'

Anna placed a hand on the back of John's neck and pulled John closer to her. 'I may not be your lawful wife, but I am ready, in fact I want you to make me your wife in this sense. Please.'

In the next moment John was positioning himself so he could join them, Anna gasping as she adjusted to the weight of John between her legs, to the feel of him against her. Locking eyes with Anna, he pushed gently so he was partially inside Anna before feeling a little resistance. Anna winced, causing John's heart to break a little. He knew it was going to hurt her, Anna knew herself.

John took it upon himself to entwine Anna's hand with his own, hoping this act would reassure her. Never moving his gaze from Anna's, he moved his hips slightly, breaking through Anna's barrier until he was enveloped in her. John stilled completely, giving Anna time to adjust to the feeling of him inside her. Suppressing the desire to move his hips, he gently kissed Anna's neck, moving up to her cheek before pressing his lips gently against Anna's.

'Are you alright, my love?'

Anna nodded, the initial pain now subsiding to a gentle thud. Anna's overwhelming feeling was that of happiness, exhilaration that she and John were finally together in this way.

'I'm alright,' Anna moved her legs to wrap around John's hips, the movement causing him to move even closer to her.

'Christ, Anna,' John groaned. 'You feel so wonderful.'

'Please continue,' Anna stroked John's cheek.

John's hips began to move, Anna finding the sensation almost overwhelming. It wasn't just because it was her first time, it was because of the person she was sharing this experience with. In the past few moments, she had fallen even more in love with John, this side of him being revealed to her. It made her truly realise this was what it was like to share a proper relationship, to belong to someone. She was now his and there was no sweeter feeling in existence.

As he continued to move against her, Anna felt tremors of her own pleasure resonating within her. The noises escaping John were some she had never heard before, she closed her eyes to fully take them in. She had driven him to this, she allowed herself a look at his face. His brow was sweaty, his hair dishevelled, his eyes half closed. John had never looked more handsome to her as he did in this moment. To know him in this manner was all she had ever wanted.

'Oh Anna,' John gasped, continuing to say her name over and over as his movements became more erratic. His movements stilled almost completely, Anna watching his face intently.

'Anna, I can't hold on much longer. Maybe I should pull away.'

'Why on earth would you do that?'

'You know where this could lead, what could happen...'

'John,' Anna whispered harshly. 'I am not going to say it again. We are together, people around here think we are married. This is what is expected of us. Please don't feel you have to stop. I don't want you to stop.'

'Alright, alright. I'm sorry.'

'Don't be sorry, just please accept this is what I want. You are what I want. Please finish, John. Let it come.'

Her words drove him over the edge as John hips thrust towards her for a final time. In the next moment, he let out a long, guttural moan, Anna realising he had reached his finish. John immediately realised in all his experience that his pleasure had never been this intense. Collapsing against Anna, his body completely covering her, John tried to move beside her before Anna wrapped her arms around his shoulders.

'No,' she breathed. 'Don't move. I don't want to let you go yet.'

John nodded, knowing he needed to be exactly what Anna needed him to be in this moment. He rested his head beside hers on the pillow, softly kissing her ear.

'How do you feel?' John asked before adding, 'I mean with everything that's just...'

'Ssssh,' Anna silenced him. She let a few moments pass before answering his question. 'I feel complete. For the first time in my life. How about you?'

'There are no words,' John whispered. 'I don't deserve you, to be able to touch you in the ways I just have. You are perfect.'

After a few moments, Anna released her hold on John, allowing him to move from her. The loss of contact was agony until John reached for her, pulling Anna into his embrace. At first, they just stared at each other, the scent of their lovemaking lingering in the air, the covers down to their waists. Soon, the heat of their exertion waned, John reaching for the covers and pulling them up to cover them both. Anna turned so her back was to John, wrapping his arms around her waist as Anna pressed her back into John's front.

'Anna, how are you feeling?' John asked, breaking the peaceful silence between them. He longed to ensure she wasn't in any discomfort, any pain.

'I'm fine, I feel a little strange but more than anything but I am so happy we did what we just did.'

'Me too,' John replied, tightening his grip around Anna. 'I love you.'

'I love you too.'

'My wife. In every sense of the word, now.'

Anna hummed her agreement, tiredness threatening to overwhelm her. 'I am now who I was meant to be.'


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N- Slightly shorter chapter, mostly John and Anna getting up to mischief. They are living in sin to be fair. **

**Disclaimer:** All characters belong to Julian Fellowes, ITV, Carnival

* * *

Walking into the cottage, closing the door quietly behind him, John shook off his jacket before hanging it on the hook. Another evening shift over with, a smile instantly took over his lips as he saw light coming from the living room, the door slightly ajar. Anna had insisted she stay up and wait for John to come home. John had tried to convince her to go to bed. His argument was that they had had their fair share of late nights at Downton and should make the most of the new situation they found themselves in. His argument was dismissed.

'Good evening,' John whispered, looking around the door to see Anna curled up in the armchair, engrossed in a book. Anna hadn't heard him, her brow furrowed in concentration as she read. She looked breathtaking. Her blonde hair cascading down her shoulders. John smiled as he noticed her lips twitch slightly as she turned the page. These were the moments he had longed for. Him and Anna like this. As John hung his cane on the back of a wooden chair by the door, it made more of a noise than he would have liked. Suddenly she looked up, John starting a little as he realised Anna had noticed him.

'God John,' Anna breathed, raising a hand to her chest. 'You made me jump. How long have you been stood there?'

'Not long,' John trod towards Anna before coming to a stop next to her armchair. 'Good book?'

'Not bad, I was just passing the time really,' Anna closed the book and placed it on the table beside her. 'Busy at the pub?'

John shook his head, wincing as he moved to kneel beside Anna. 'Jack was in, he's leaving tomorrow. Said he'd call into the tea room to say goodbye to you.'

'Lovely. He's such a nice man, it must run in the Bates family.' She raised a hand to stroke John's cheek. 'I missed you.'

John leaned into her touch, closing his eyes before exhaling deeply. 'I missed you too.'

'Would you like me to make you something to eat?' Anna asked, rising to her feet before looking down at him. 'Some of the pie we had this afternoon is left.'

'No, that's fine. I had a sandwich earlier, Elizabeth brought it over for me.'

'Did she now?' Anna raised a suspicious eyebrow before walking out to the kitchen. John slowly got to his feet, overcoming the slight twinge in his knee before following Anna. 'She's still keen on you, I see.'

'No, she bought George one too,' John protested, leaning on the doorframe as Anna went about preparing a tray of tea. 'Besides, they were leftovers.'

'We expect more of those who are trying to woo us,' Anna said mockingly, shaking her head. 'Leftovers indeed.'

'She is not trying to woo me.'

Anna looked over her shoulder at John, her eyes wide, a mischievous smirk on her lips. 'Please. Give me some credit.'

'If I wasn't mistaken, I'd say someone was jealous.'

Laughing out loud at the suggestion, Anna turned her attentions back to making the tea as John moved towards her. Standing behind Anna, he rested his head on her shoulder, watching intently as her hands went about arranging the tray in front of her.

'You don't need reassuring of my love for you, Anna,' John whispered, his breath hot against her ear causing Anna's breathing to hitch. 'But please understand that since the first moment I ever saw you that was it. No other woman has occupied my thoughts or my heart quite the way that you do.'

'Thank you,' Anna gently touched her temple against John's. 'But I'm dying to know. Who makes the better sandwiches?'

'Oh, it's no contest. Elizabeth's are exquisite.'

Stepping back slightly, his face beaming, John waited to see how Anna would react to his teasing. Reaching for a glass she had left atop the kitchen counter, Anna filled it with cold water before turning to John. His faced turned from a smile to one of mock horror as Anna flicked the contents of the glass in his direction. Attempts to avoid the attack were futile as the front of his waistcoat was drenched in water.

Clearly, Anna hadn't thought her plan through. John turned to see a jug of water, left from the meal they shared before John went to work, still sitting on the table. Anna's eyes turned to his hand now moving for the handle of the jug.

'John Bates, don't even think about it.'

Holding her hands up to protect herself, John thought better of emptying the contents of the jug over the woman who had made him such a delicious pie the previous afternoon. Placing the jug back on the table, he turned to leave the kitchen.

'Shall we have tea in the living room?'

In the next moment, his breath was taken away as cold water cascaded over his head, dripping down his back all the way to the floor. If he didn't turn to see Anna, grin on her face, empty jug in hand he wouldn't have believed she had just poured the contents over his head.

'Anna, I cannot ...'

Before he could finish his sentence, she had darted passed him and was thundering up the stairs. Laughing gently, John made to move after her, running a hand through his soaking wet hair. Turning the lights off downstairs, John embarked on the stairs. Reaching the top, he moved along the landing to the bedroom. Opening the door, he found Anna standing in the corner, giggling incessantly as John appeared.

'What was that all about?' John asked, water still dripping down his body.

'You aren't half handsome with wet hair, do you know that?'

'Don't try and change the subject,' John walked to the chair that sat by Anna's dresser and draped his drenched waistcoat over the back of it.

'Well, let this be a lesson to you, Mr Bates.' John turned his attentions to Anna as he took off his tie and collar. 'Never say another woman's cooking is better than your own wife's.'

'That's all very well and good,' John agreed, 'But wasn't drowning me a little over the top?'

'I don't think so,' Anna was now standing in front of John, taking his braces in each of her fists. 'As I said earlier, you don't half look handsome with your hair slightly damp. Some of my happiest memories of our life together so far have been watching you after you have had a bath.'

'Still, I have to get out of these wet clothes now.' John gently pressed his lips to Anna's, lingering close to her as she pushed his braces over his shoulders.

'Let me help you.'

With his braces now hanging down by his side, John took Anna's face in his hands, deepening the kiss they were sharing as she moved to start unfastening his buttons. Although having lived in this manner for a few weeks, it was still important to John that they move at a pace which Anna dictated. Their times together had been wonderful, getting to know each other in this whole new light. For the first time in his life, John felt complete. The situation took on a whole new meaning now it was Anna he was making love to. The fact they weren't married was immaterial, this felt right and that was all that mattered to them.

John's chest now revealed to her, his shirt on the floor, Anna took off her robe before making her way to lay on her side of the bed. John undressed himself to his shorts then joined Anna. As soon as he was settled, he closed his eyes as Anna rested a hand on his chest.

'I am sorry about the water,' Anna confessed softly, shifting closer to John and wrapping her leg around his hip. 'It was a moment of madness.'

'I was joking about the sandwiches,' John replied, bringing his hand to rest under the knee of Anna's leg. 'But if emptying a jug of water over me brought us to this situation sooner, then I don't regret a thing.'

'I love times like these,' Anna breathed, gently running her fingers through the hairs on John's chest. 'Lying with you. Like this.'

'Yes, I'm rather fond of them too.' Kissing her lips briefly, John felt Anna's hands tugging at the waistband to his shorts. 'Someone is keen this evening.'

'I've been waiting for this moment since the last time,' Anna confessed, her cheeks reddening slightly. 'At the moment, I'm living from night to night. I can't wait to lay beside you each and every evening.'

'Again, I concur. But I think it's rather unfair that I am nearly completely undressed and you still have this blasted nightdress on. Pretty though it is.'

Anna leant back from John, lifting herself from the bed slightly. Removing the nightdress in the same movement, John looked on amazed as Anna's flawless body was revealed to him.

'Is that better?'

'Much,' John gasped, kissing Anna's bare shoulder.

Moving his hand from Anna's knee, he placed his palm against one of her breasts, Anna letting out a sigh at his touch. John resumed the kiss, deepening it instantly as he teased Anna's nipple between his thumb and forefinger. In their weeks of lovemaking, John had learnt Anna particularly enjoyed being touched in this way. Tonight was no different as he leant back, looking at the look of utter bliss on her face as his hands explored her body. His attentions were drawn to Anna tugging on his shorts once again, this time he obliged, allowing her to remove them.

'Are you alright?' John asked, Anna now knowing this was his way of asking if he could move the situation further along.

'Yes.'

John moved his hand slowly down Anna's body, gently grazing the side of her breast with his knuckles before resting his hand on her hip bone. Anticipation flowed through Anna as his hand moved to her stomach, before coming to rest just above her centre. She felt like a coiled spring, desperately needing to feel relief as John's actions remained tentative and gentle. Moving his hand further down, he gasped as he came into contact with the moisture already accumulating between Anna's thighs. Before he could push a finger inside Anna, she took him by surprise and lay on her back, pulling John with her.

'Anna, are you alright?'

'I'm ready for you now,' Anna replied. 'Make love to me.'

Not wanting to deny her for a moment longer, John manoeuvred himself so he was above Anna, his knees either side of hers. He was smiling, looking deeply into her eyes as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. 'What's brought this on?'

'I told you what your wet hair does to me,' Anna whispered, close to his ear. 'I didn't know what I was missing until a few weeks ago. Now it seems I can't go too long without feeling you close to me. Do these feelings fade in time?'

'I couldn't tell you,' he replied, adjusting himself so his arousal was resting against Anna. ' I've never felt like this before. I can assure you, my desire for shows no sign of waning.'

'I'm glad.'

In the next moment, John was pushing himself inside Anna. She pushed her head back against her pillow as John completed his movements, now completely enveloped in her. She felt so warm against him, John's breath had quickened in pace with this simple action.

'I love you,' John rested his forehead against Anna's.

'I love you too.'

Anna held John close to her as he began to move his hips, slowly at first before settling into a steady rhythm. He groaned aloud as Anna began to move her hips to meet his before crushing his lips against Anna's in a kiss.

She couldn't explain the effect John had on her, so soon after instigating their time together tonight, he was already driving her close to her end. He had invaded all her senses in what seemed like no time at all, a gentle throbbing at her core ensued as she revelled in the sensation of John moving inside her.

'Oh God, John...' she called out, soft waves of pleasure already beginning to flow throughout her body.

'Anna,' John breathed in response, the feeling of her all around him meaning it wouldn't be too long until his desires were fulfilled as well. 'Christ, you feel so good.'

Suddenly, the soft waves that had been washing over Anna turned into an explosion, pleasure filling her every sense as her hands grabbed hold of the bed sheet beneath her. In the next second, John's movements stilled, before with one final thrust of his hips he joined her in complete and utter bliss.

'Bloody hell,' John murmured, resting his forehead on Anna's pillow. 'A jug of water lead to this.'

'Don't forget your damp hair.'

John allowed himself a small chuckle before brushing his lips against Anna's. Gently moving to his side of the bed, John pulled Anna into his embrace. She sighed contentedly, tucking her head next to John's neck and resting her hand on his chest.

'Sleep now, my angel,' John whispered. 'You have a puddle of water in the kitchen to contend with tomorrow morning.'

* * *

Shy glances were exchanged over breakfast the next morning, a mop sat used in the corner of the room. Anna was ready for a day of work at the tea room, settling into her new job with relative ease. Although they had to leave Downton to live the life they wanted together, both missed having the knowledge that they were in the same building, no doubt bound to see each other in the servants hall at some point. To combat this, Anna would head over to the pub on her break to see John and George. In turn, John would stop off at the tea rooms to see Anna before heading off to help George set up for afternoon trading. Neither enjoyed being away from the other, but as John had told Anna the moments they shared together more than made up for the times they were apart.

'Could you pass me the butter, darling?' John asked, taking a piece of toast from the rack in front of him.

'Shall we go for a walk when I finish tonight?' Anna suggested, passing John the dish of butter. 'Before you and George open up for the evening. It's been the first sunny day we've had in ages. Maybe a walk by the brook?'

'Alright,' John nodded, buttering his toast. 'It will be nice to get some exercise.'

Anna raised an eyebrow. 'And what do you call what we did last night?'

'Fair point,' John nodded as memories of their encounter invaded his mind. He watched Anna as a smile played upon her lips. She really was the most beautiful creature he had ever laid his eyes upon. 'Are you happy we did all this? Moved up here, made the decisions that we made?'

'Mr Bates, if you are asking me if I regret giving up everything for you, a repeat of last nights drowning might be on the cards. Every day you do something or say something that convinces me more this was the right thing to do.'

'So you are happy?' John asked again, Anna lifting her head to meet his gaze. 'Really?'

'Yes. I am happy.'

* * *

Walking hand in hand beside the river, conversation and laughter were flowing as John and Anna came to stop at a small bridge. Leaning against it, Anna pointed out two children playing on the riverbank below.

'They are Annette's children,' Anna explained. 'She comes into the tea room quite a lot. Her husband is missing in action.'

'I'm sorry to hear that,' John replied, placing a hand on Anna's back.

'Yes, well it's to be expected nowadays, isn't it?'

'I suppose,' John sighed before looking behind him and noticing a small bench. 'Can we sit?'

'Of course.'

As they sat, a thought played over in Anna's mind. Looking up at John as he watched Annette's children, she smiled. 'Adorable, aren't they?'

'Who are?' John asked.

'The children.'

'Oh, I don't know,' John shrugged. 'I'm just wondering if they realise they'd have more luck trying to get that kite in the air if they moved to a more open space.'

'Ever the teacher,' Anna giggled. 'You might have children of your own to pass your knowledge onto one day.'

John suddenly turned to look at Anna, panic-stricken. 'You're not...'

'No, I'm not,' Anna replied, nudging into him gently. 'But thanks for that reassuring reaction.'

'Don't get me wrong, it's just it would be a bit soon. And what with our situation...'

'Stop right there,' Anna interrupted. 'It wouldn't make a difference if I was pregnant now, in a month or in a year. It would still be the same situation. And it would still feel right because you would be the father.'

John took Anna's hand in his, lifting it to his lips before placing a kiss upon the back.

'Oh,' he said suddenly, reaching into the inside pocket of his jacket. 'I almost forgot. This letter came for you after you left this morning.'

Tearing into the letter, Anna smiled as she recognised the handwriting. 'It's from Mrs Hughes.'

'Lovely. What does she say?'

'Mr Carson is moaning more than usual after losing two of his best staff.'

'That sounds like Mr Carson,' John chuckled.

'She hopes we have settled well and that our secret is still safe. No one has heard from Vera, thank God and no one expects to. His Lordships new Valet is a nice chap, albeit slightly withdrawn. He's been discharged from the army recently having been in the trenches. And my replacement is being shown the ropes by Ethel, God help her.' Anna continued to read in her head for a moment, John alarmed by her sudden silence before looking at her face. Her features had darkened, her earlier excitement at receiving the letter quashed.

'Anna, what is it?'

'It's Mrs Patmore,' Anna said, looking up at John from the letter. 'She's ill.'


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N- So, before we were so rudely interrupted, back to Living In Sin we go. Lots of living in sin in this chapter. As a very kind reviewer said, if they are living in sin may aswell make the most of it. As I have said before, not the best at writing this type of stuff but as always give it my best shot. Hope you enjoy.**

**Disclaimer- **Downton Abbey belongs to Julian Fellowes, ITV and Carnival.

* * *

Entering the tea room, John scanned the room for any sign of his wife. It wasn't particularly busy today, with it being market day in a nearby town. George had decided to visit, leaving John in sole charge of The Swan. With lunchtime trading over, and Harold insisting he could manage with the rest of the clearing up, John decided on paying Anna a visit. His trip to her place of work was also tinged with an ulterior motive, John also half looking out for Agnes, the owner of the tea room. Agnes had a daughter who also worked with her and Anna, Emily, who was the same age as Anna and had become a good friend. It relieved John that Anna had been able to make friends of the female persuasion in their new home. He had always noticed how close Anna had been to Gwen, and it pleased him she was able to find a similar relationship in unfamiliar surroundings.

Six months had passed since they had made the decision to leave Downton together. In those months they had become well-liked members of the local community, what with working in two of the most popular businesses in the area. It seemed everybody knew them, and every person they had encountered had been friendly and welcoming. Anna was in regular contact with Mrs Hughes at Downton, particularly since news of Mrs Patmore's illness had been revealed to her and John. When you work and live in close proximity with people and are away from home like Anna was at Downton, it is easy for colleagues to become like family and that was certainly the case for Anna when it concerned Mrs Patmore. In the six months since the first correspondence from Mrs Hughes, her condition had deteriorated very quickly, Daisy's training to head cook accelerated with the help of Mrs Byrd. In the last letter, it seemed it was only a matter of time before Mrs Patmore let go. On the insistence of Her Ladyship, the cook had been spending her final days in one of the rooms at Downton, the family feeling it was the least they could for one of their most loyal servants. John and Anna decided as soon as they knew they would find someway to attend the funeral, when the time arrived. It would take some planning, but both were in agreement they needed to be there.

Despite the bad news emanating from Downton, Anna could whole heartedly say she had never been as happy in her life as she had been in her time at Scotland. It was easy to forget sometimes they were not actually married. Living as man and wife came so naturally, Anna wishing they had made the break much earlier. The cottage was now how they wanted it, their own perfect home. For John however, it was his perfect home because he shared it with Anna. The sacrifice Anna had made for him was never far from his mind, he taking it upon himself to ensure every day Anna felt loved and that she never regretted the decision she had made.

Little visits such as the one John was making now had become commonplace. Anna would visit John at the pub before she started her afternoon shifts, he would come and see her between lunchtime and evening trading. Anna only worked three afternoons a week and one Saturday a month, meaning the majority of the time she spent working on the cottage or preparing dinner for John on his arrival home in the evening. It was these simple domesticated activities that Anna had longed for, to just be able to cook a meal for the man she loved.

'Hello John.'

John turned to see Agnes busy wiping down a table beside the window of the tea room. He smiled, glad to see her before Anna had noticed him.

'Agnes, I was wondering if I could have a word.'

'Go ahead, you don't mind if I carry on whilst you speak? I'm not being rude but we're expecting a rush on at tea time.'

'Not at all,' John replied, removing his hat and placing it on the stand beside the door. 'Anna about?'

'It's her turn for washing up. She'll be out in a little bit. Did you want to speak to her?'

'In a minute, it's just you know her birthday is coming up.'

'I do.'

'Well, I was wondering if you might grant Anna the day off? It falls on one of her shift days you see and I wanted to treat her.'

'I don't think that should be a problem. I can rope in Emily's sister to help if needs be.' Agnes stood upright, a smile on her face. 'What did you have in mind?'

'Just a picnic, nothing too strenuous.' John said with a shrug. 'I unfortunately have to work in the evening.'

'Well, I'm sure she'll enjoy whatever you have planned. Absolutely besotted with you, so she is.'

'Really?' John blushed, averting his gaze from Agnes to catch a glimpse through the door to the kitchen of Anna carrying newly cleaned plates.

'She's always talking about you,' Agnes followed his line of sight as Anna looked out into the tea room and saw John at the entrance. 'If we didn't know better we would all think you were a pair of love struck teenagers.'

'Hello darling,' Anna moved down the room towards John, a huge smile on her face.

'Hello there,' John replied, meeting Anna's gaze and grinning slightly. 'Good afternoon?'

'Yes actually, what were you two whispering about?'

'Nothing,' Agnes shook her head. 'Just passing the time of day, that's all. I'll leave the two of you to it.'

'Hmm, I'm not so sure,' Anna raised a sceptical eyebrow before turning her full attention to John. 'How was lunchtime?'

'Quiet, that market seems to have stolen all our trade. They have a beer tasting stall apparently, George has gone to see if any ales are worth bringing in.'

'All very exciting, I'm sure,' Anna said with a glint in her eye. 'This morning was very enjoyable by the way, Mr Bates.'

Furrowing his brow a little, he soon realised what Anna was insinuating, his lips upturning into a smile that reached his eyes, the crinkles that Anna loved quickly surfacing.

'What can I say, Mrs Bates?' he whispered huskily, moving a little closer so only Anna could hear. 'It would seem I am a morning person.'

'John, come quick.'

Their moment was interrupted by Harold appearing at the tea room door, completely soaked in water with a spanner in his hand.

'What the...'

'A burst pipe in the kitchen,' Harold exclaimed, interrupting John.

'I best go,' John said to Anna, gently rubbing her arm. 'I'll see you later, God willing.'

* * *

Turning over in bed, Anna was surprised to not feel a familiar presence beside her. Her arm was met with nothingness and it confused her somewhat. She wasn't due in work today and John didn't need to be at The Swan until the evening. The clock revealing it had just turned eight only added to the ambiguity. Where was John? Suddenly, the sound of footsteps treading the stairs filled her ears. Feeling relieved, she settled back down in bed, stretching out her limbs as she stared at the door, a lazy grin on her face as she waited for it to open. Then she remembered what day it was. Stopping to listen as John stood outside the door, she couldn't help but laugh as he struggled to open it. He was fumbling with the doorknob, Anna couldn't fathom why. In the next moment, the door flicked open slightly, John opening it the rest of the way with a soft kick. What was revealed to her took Anna's breath away.

John had prepared her a tray, complete with a small vase of flowers that he had obviously picked from the garden. A rack of toast sat upon the tray, a pot of tea and a couple of boiled eggs. John was wearing a sheepish smile as his eyes met Anna's, stepping into the room and closing the door with another kick.

'I don't know what to say,' Anna breathed as John approached her with the tray. Anna was slightly disappointed to see he was dressed, albeit partially. He was wearing a white shirt, undone at the collar and cuffs, and his brown suit trousers. He also had bare feet, the sight Anna's undoing on a number of occasions in the past six months. She couldn't put her finger in it, maybe it was the simple fact in all the four years they had been at Downton together, she had never actually seen his feet.

'Happy birthday,' John said as he handed the tray over to Anna. She sat up, taking the tray from him and resting it upon her knees. John moved around to his side of the bed, promptly sitting beside Anna and taking a slice of toast.

'Oh I see,' Anna laughed as John took a bite from the toast. 'You make me breakfast then begin eating it before I've even had a chance to start myself.'

'Come on, there's enough there for two.'

'Hmm,' Anna replied before reaching across to place a soft kiss on John's cheek. 'Thank you.'

Silence fell then as thoughts of the last time John brought Anna a tray filled her mind. No one had ever done anything as romantic for her in her whole life. Anna had found John endearing from the moment he arrived at Downton. She loved to talk to him, to share discussions long into night about subjects that interested them both, and she used to talk his ear off about her family and her upbringing. He always listened intently, John had a way of making Anna feel like she was the only woman in existence. She was smitten with him, however it wasn't until that evening of the fair when she believed he could feel the same way. The grin he gave her as he handed over the tray made her knees weaken, they way they stared at each other setting each of her senses alight.

'What are you thinking about?' John asked, reaching for another piece of toast.

'You.'

'Oh dear, that sounds ominous,' John took a bite of the toast. 'May I ask what these thoughts entail.'

'The night of the fair, do you remember?'

John stopped chewing, manoeuvring his head so he could look into Anna's eyes. Did he remember that evening? It was a moment that he often revisited, particularly in the long lonely nights at Downton when he longed for Anna to be by his side.

'I do,' he said with a nod, quickly followed by a smile. 'Why are you thinking about that?'

'I often think about it,' Anna replied honestly before following John's example and taking a piece of toast for herself, before he ate it all. 'You bringing me the tray just now reminded me of it. No one had ever done a thing like that for me.'

'Well, I couldn't leave you hungry could I?'

'I wanted you to kiss me then, do you know that?'

John stopped chewing once again. 'Really?'

'Yes, it was the smile you gave me. It nearly knocked me off my feet.'

'You looked so beautiful, standing there on the other side of the door,' John mused, staring straight ahead. 'The sight of you cemented the fact I was in love with you.'

'You already knew before that moment?' Anna realised they had never actually spoken about such matters. Curiosity had gotten the better of her and she decided to press for more answers. 'When did you know?'

'I can't remember exactly...'

'I can,' Anna interrupted before beginning to pour herself a cup of tea.

'You can?'

'Oh yes,' Anna nodded with a smirk upon her lips. 'You probably don't even remember.'

'Try me.'

'The rest of the servants had gone into the village, the travelling salesman had set up there.'

'I remember,' A knowing smile spread over John's lips.

'Well, you walked into the servants hall and I was sitting at the table alone. You asked me where everyone else was. I told you and you gave me the most delicious reply. No man had ever made me feel the way you did with those three words.'

'Alone at last.'

'Yes.' Anna breathed, turning to look at John. Their eyes met once again, John raising his eyebrows for a split second, that grin that Anna loved spread across his face. 'So, what about you? Can you really not remember?'

He tilted his head to the side a little, looking beyond Anna at the door as he thought carefully. Suddenly he began to nod. 'I think I can. My feelings for you began from the first moment. You offering your hand when I first arrived, standing up for me in the kitchen as everyone questioned my capabilities. I think I loved you from then, it just took your opening up to me in Lady Edith's room, when I helped you make her bed to make me realise. I am, of course, but a man.'

Anna placed the tray carefully on the bedside table before turning to face John. He watched her movements, looking over her shoulder at the tray balanced precariously on the table.

'Not hungry?' John asked, looking down as Anna entwined her fingers with his.

'I've just thought of something I'd much rather be doing than eating.'

'Oh, and what's that?' John raised an eyebrow as Anna's hand stroked his cheek. He looked at the clock on the wall. 'I need to pick something up in an hour or so, before you get any ideas.'

'Oh come on, Mr Bates. You aren't going to leave me disappointed are you?' Anna whined, moving her body closer to John's. 'It is my birthday after all. And what do you have to pick up?'

'You'll find out later, it's a surprise,' John moved his hand to rest on the small of Anna's back, she seemingly satisfied with his explanation. 'But you have convinced me, how could I leave you disappointed on your birthday?'

Their lips met in a languid kiss then, thoughts of the surprise he had planned pushed to the back of his mind as Anna invaded all his senses.

'You really are a morning person, aren't you Mr Bates?'

'Hmmm..' he growled, moving his lips to her neck. 'Let me show you how much of one I am.'

* * *

A picnic was Anna's birthday surprise, arranged by John after Anna had enjoyed the last one so much. Laughter flowed and kisses were shared as they revelled in each other's company, the babbling brook an atmospheric backdrop to their afternoon. Half way through, John presented Anna with a small gold locket engraved with a simple pattern. It took her breath away when John handed Anna with the gift, she begged him to help her put it on immediately. As with all the time they spent together, the moment when they would need to part always arrived too quickly.

'How do you know a picnic with you is one of my favourite activities?' Anna asked as they began to walk back from the brook.

'Well, you enjoyed the last one so much, as did I.' John replied 'Although, if I hadn't been working this evening we would have been going into town for dinner in a proper restaurant.'

Anna squeezed John's forearm. 'I don't need anything fancy like that, you already treat me enough as it is. This locket you bought me, it's beautiful. I shall treasure it.'

'Nothing I do will ever be enough, or amount to what you deserve.'

'Rubbish,' Anna laughed softly as they reached the final field before they would arrive back in the village.

The barn came into sight, where they had promised themselves to the other the night they arrived in Scotland. An idea played over in Anna's mind as they approached the barn, this new side to herself she had no idea existed until she knew John in the way that she did now. The barn was disused, she knew that much. One of the girls she worked with at the tea room, Rosie, had spoken about it. At the end of a very long shift, she had replied to Anna's question about her plans for the evening by saying that she and Harry, the man she stepped out with, were planning to meet by the barn. When Anna asked why, she was met with a mischievous grin. Rosie whispered that the barn was no longer needed, the farmer using a new and larger one in a different field. She and Harry planned to spend some time there together. It didn't take a detective to work out what Rosie meant by spending time together. This was the first time she and John had walked by the barn since Anna had found out, and suddenly it was all she could think about.

'You're very quiet, Anna,' John said suddenly as they reached the bottom of the field. 'Is everything alright?'

Anna stopped walking and looked up at John, fiddling with her locket between her thumb and forefinger. 'Would you be willing to try something a little daring, Mr Bates?'

John's response was a puzzled expression, Anna leading him closer to the entrance to the barn. 'Whatever do you mean?'

Taking the picnic basket from John's grasp, Anna gently placed it on the floor before wrapping her arms around John's neck. In the next moment, Anna was pressing her lips to John's. He was reluctant at first, until Anna gently parting her lips was too tempting to turn down. John deepened the kiss, moving his arms around Anna's waist.

'What's got into you?' John breathed, looking around them to make sure no one was watching. 'We can't do this, not here.'

'The barn is no longer in use, Rosie told me,' Anna whispered. 'And I am going to miss you terribly when you work your shift this evening. As my last birthday wish, would you mind giving me something to last until you return home tonight?'

'What? Here?' John growled under his breath, turning his attentions to the barn behind Anna.

'Here,' Anna's voice was seductive and persuasive as she stepped back from John a little, taking hold of the lapels on his suit jacket and pulling him in the direction of the barn. He couldn't refuse her anything when she had this glint in her eye as they moved even closer to the barn. 'Have you ever been with someone outside, John?'

He almost groaned at the question, hearing her speak this candidly did nothing to help the side of his conscious that was screaming at him that this was dangerous.

'I can't remember,' John replied, unable to avert his eyes from Anna's. 'Are you sure about this Anna? What if someone comes by...'

Anna silenced him by covering his mouth with her own, instantly seeking to intensify the kiss. John relented, desire overtaking him. His cane clattered to the floor, the sound it made echoing around the old barn as Anna began to shrug his jacket from his shoulders. The garment now lay abandoned on the floor as John caught Anna completely by surprise, lifting her up from the ground. Instinct called Anna to wrap her legs around his hips, deepening the contact between them. John's hands now rested on Anna's backside, keeping her steady as he stood holding her off floor. If Anna wanted John here then he would happily oblige her, but he wouldn't make love to her on the floor. She deserved more than that. Breaking the kiss, Anna brushed her hands through his hair as John hurriedly thought what to do next. Then he had an idea.

John walked towards the side of the barn, where a number of stacks of hay lay piled. Anna couldn't help but be mesmerised by how strong he was, despite his war wound. Resting her hands on his upper arms, she thrilled in the way she felt the muscles contract as he held her. It seemed effortless as he carried her towards the hay, situated in the middle of the barn. Taller stacks around them meant they were well hidden as John placed Anna atop one of the shorter piles.

As soon as she was comfortable, John resumed the kiss they had been sharing when they had entered the barn. He stood as she kept her legs firmly wrapped around his hips. Anna felt familiar stirrings in the pit of her stomach as John moved his lips to her neck, his hands working their way skilfully around her body, grazing the sides of her breasts, touching her in all the ways John had memorised that she liked. Even fully clothed, he still managed to make her feel as if her body were on fire.

'My darling,' John breathed, resting his forehead against Anna's. 'I don't think its wise to remove all our clothing but if we are to continue we need...'

Her skirt was already bunched to her middle, however Anna understood what John meant as she lifted herself from the hay. He expertly pulled her undergarments down to her knees, the sight of her creamy white thighs threatening to push him over the edge. In the time he had taken to drink in the sight of her, Anna had already manoeuvred herself to undo the fastening on his trousers. He let out a low, guttural sound as Anna cupped him, the need to be inside her now escalating.

John moved closer so he could whisper in Anna's ear. 'I want you, now.'

He pulled down his underwear and immediately, Anna's legs were around John's hips once more. His hardness pressed against her sent the first waves of pleasure flowing through Anna's body. He sought out her eyes with his own, begging her for permission to continue. She answered with a kiss, pressing her lips against his as she braced herself, wrapping her arms around John's shoulders. Keeping his gaze firmly on Anna's, John joined them. It felt like the first time all over again as they stilled their movements, accustoming to being together in this new position.

'Are you alright, Anna?' John managed to formulate his words, despite the situation rendering him completely and utterly hopeless.

'This feels so good,' Anna pressed her forehead against John's, her eyes tightly closed.

Smiling at her words, John met Anna's lips with a kiss which became more languid as he began to move his hips. Anna could do nothing but moan with pleasure as they settled into a steady rhythm, their hips rocking together. Any fears of proprietary were long forgotten as both became totally lost within the other. It didn't take long for Anna to feel her whole body shuddering, waves of ecstasy flowing through her as John's thrusts became deeper and faster. Coherent thoughts were impossible as John drove her closer. And she could feel John too, having got to know him in this manner over the past six months, she knew by the sound of his breathing and his demeanour that he too was close to the edge.

'Christ, Anna.'

John's breath was hot in her ear, the tone in his voice was enough for Anna to let herself go, her walls seemingly erupting, an explosion at her core. And it was unlike any she had experienced previously, not even in her earlier exertions with John. Lost in her own pleasure, she was only just realising John too had reached his end. They stood in silence for a moment, both trying to regulate their breathing, to come back down to earth. Anna loved these moments, in the immediate aftermath. Although spent and their desires fulfilled, they were both still connected. Only Anna knew John in this way and it thrilled her more than she could ever describe. When talking about these acts with the other maids back at Downton, it had always been made out to be a sordid thing, that thing that men needed to keep them content. On trips home to visit her family, late night conversations had resulted in Anna's mother insisting it needn't be like that, if you shared yourself with the right man. Even though they couldn't be married, Anna knew she could never find a better man than the one whose arms were wrapped around her right now, holding her tight.

'That was certainly interesting,' John murmured before kissing Anna's cheek.

'I've always enjoyed you making love to me, but it's never felt like that before.' Anna remarked before immediately following it with a giggle. 'Sorry.'

'For what?' John asked, reciprocating her laughter. 'Never be sorry for speaking in that way with me, Anna. It makes me happy to know you enjoy this as much as I do.'

'Things got a little out of hand,' Anna continued. 'I just saw the barn and couldn't get what Rosie had said out of my mind.'

'Well, it seems I have a lot to thank Rosie for.'

Now back in the village, Anna and John were lost in conversation as Peter from the post office approached them, looking rather flustered, waving a piece of paper in the air.

'Where have you been, I've been looking all over for you.'

'Sorry Peter,' Anna replied, looking up at John who was wearing a grin. 'We were otherwise indisposed. Whatever is the matter?'

'A telegram came for you. We felt it was a bit odd, telegrams never get sent to these parts. Any road, it's from a Mrs Hughes from a Downton Abbey?'

'Let me see,' Anna said weakly, letting go of John's arm as she took the paper from Peter. John looked at her face, in a matter of seconds Anna's complexion had turned pale as she studied the piece of paper in front of her.

'What is it?' John asked.

'It's Mrs Patmore,' Anna met John's gaze. 'She's passed away.'

* * *

Mr Carson walked into the servants hall, the room deadly quiet as everyone tried to come to terms with the loss of one of their most valued colleagues. Mrs Hughes was consoling Daisy, the Butler feeling it a wrench to call the housekeeper away.

'Mrs Hughes, may I see you in my sitting room?'

She nodded, looking behind her to Ethel who stood up and took Daisy into her embrace. Following Mr Carson to his sitting room in silence, she chanced a look at the kitchen. A small part of her hoping to see the cook hard at work. Looking away, closing her eyes in an attempt to stem the tears that threatened to fall, she entered the room.

'Yes, Mr Carson?' Mrs Hughes said, leaving the door slightly ajar.

'I have received a telegram, from Mr Bates and Anna.'

Miss O Brien was coming down the stairs at this moment, and heard the Butler's words. Intrigue got the better of her as she quietly moved closer to the sitting room door.

'They are returning for the funeral. Anna first, then Mr Bates will arrive a couple of days later, as to not arise suspicion.'

'That's wise of them, given the situation. They seem happy enough though, and the people they have met have accepted them as a married couple.' Mrs Hughes replied, remembering the correspondence she had received from Anna. 'I have so missed Anna, it will be lovely to see her although I wish it were in happier circumstances.'

'Indeed,' Mr Carson agreed. 'They have gone on to request that Anna stay here the night before the funeral, Mr Bates will put up in the village. We don't want anyone asking any awkward questions.'

'Quite. I shall send them a telegram with the details of the funeral when we know them.'

'Thank you, Mrs Hughes.'

Miss O Brien smiled weakly at the information she had just heard. She had her suspicions that Anna's departure had something to do with Mr Bates, but to hear that they were living together unmarried was beyond anything even she believed was possible. Walking into the servants hall, she tapped on a newly returned Thomas's shoulder. He had been sent home from the front, a wound rendering him unfit for action. His new role of managing the house as a convalescent home had gone to his head. Thomas truly believed he know had the right to give orders to the people he used to be forced to respect.

'Fancy a smoke?' Miss O Brien asked, the look in her eye convincing Thomas she had some gossip to share.

Once outside, they both lit up before Thomas sat on a stack of crates. He looked up at the ladies maid. 'So, what is it?'

'Anna is coming back for the funeral.'

'So?' Thomas shrugged. 'She worked here for years. She was close to Mrs Patmore...'

'She's bringing Mr Bates with her.'

Silence fell as Thomas processed this information in his mind. 'What do you mean? They've been living together?'

O Brien nodded as a smile spread across her lips. 'Co habiting, it seems like.'

'But he's married.'

'I know that and you know that.' O Brien took a long drag on her cigarette before continuing. 'They have moved somewhere together. And the people they have met there believe the two of them are married.'

'Well, well, well. I'll give his dues, that's for sure.' Thomas said with a chuckle, bringing his cigarette to his lips. 'Sneaky bastard.'

'It's disgusting if you ask me.' O Brien hissed, blowing a puff of smoke into the air. 'Behaving as a married couple out of wedlock. Engaging in those sorts of activities that should be reserved for people joined together in marriage. I don't think we should let him get away with it.'

'Oh no, I'm not getting involved. I've finally got a decent position within this house, I'm not letting one of your schemes mess that up.'

'Fine, but he will get his comeuppance. Mark my words.'

'What will you do?'

'His wife wrote to me a little while ago, asking if I knew of his whereabouts.'

'Well you don't,' Thomas pointed out, dropping his cigarette on the floor and stamping on it.

'Think about it,' O Brien said impatiently. 'They are coming back for the funeral. If I discreetly let Vera Bates know the details of her husband's return, who knows what will happen?'

'You are a nasty piece of work,' Thomas said with a smirk. 'That's why I'm glad you're on my side.'

* * *

_**A/N 2- There may be trouble ahead...**_


	9. Chapter 9

***EDIT* Thanks to batesfan2 who pointed out my mistake. All is rectified now, been watching Series 1 recently...**

**A/N- The calm before the storm...**

**Thanks for reviewing to those who have. It seems my heart lies with Modern AU, as I have already planned three chapters of a new modern fiction. Ooops. Determined to finish this one before I start the next. **

**Disclaimer-** _Downton Abbey belongs to Julian Fellowes/ITV/Carnival_

* * *

The sun was rising, the fact cemented by the room being bathed in a misty sunlight, streaming in through a small gap in the curtains. John had been awake for an hour or so. This was nothing unusual, insomnia had plagued his life ever since he had come back from fighting the Boers. However, there was now a difference. Before, his insomnia would render him lonely, like he was the only person in the world. But not anymore. Looking beside him, he saw Anna, his arm around her shoulders, she holding tightly to his hand. John had spent the past hour or so watching her intermittently, this was the first time she had opened her eyes. John smiled as she rolled her eyes to meet his. She moved further into his touch, nuzzling into his neck and placing a soft kiss on the skin she found there.

'You're going to have to get up soon,' John whispered gruffly. 'If you are going to catch your train.'

She responded with a moan, resulting in a chuckle from John as she draped her arm across his waist. 'Five more minutes.'

Mrs Patmore's funeral was to be held in a few days time. Anna and John had decided to leave a day apart, so as not to arise suspicion, John arriving the day before the funeral. Anna would go down first, and Mrs Hughes agreed to Anna's request for her to stay at Downton. They had both decided to stay down in Yorkshire for a couple of nights, Anna one night longer so their cover wouldn't be blown. John had already booked a couple of nights at The Grantham Arms, although Mrs Hughes had insisted he would be welcome to share dinner with the other servants if he so wished.

'How are you feeling today?' John asked, pressing a kiss upon Anna's temple.

'Still not right,' Anna replied, clutching her stomach. 'It's really odd. It's come on so suddenly. I haven't been sick since yesterday. That's one thing I suppose.'

Anna had not been feeling herself since she had received the news about Mrs Patmore, and had put her illness down to the shock of losing one of her dearest friends.

'Let's just get the funeral out of the way, you'll probably feel better once that's over with.'

'Perhaps, although I can't help but thinking being away from you for a few days is a reason behind it as well. We haven't been apart for the best part of six months.'

'It's going to be strange, certainly,' John agreed, pulling her closer to him. 'But last night will give us something to hold onto until we are together again.'

'I don't want to leave you,' Anna draped a leg over John's. 'I'm going to miss you so much.'

'It's not like we are going to be completely apart, my darling. You never know, I may even take Mrs Hughes up on her invitation of dinner with the others.'

'Part of me just wishes that...' She stopped talking, choosing to end her sentence with a sigh instead. John looked down on her, his expression concerned as he willed her to finish what she was trying to say. Never once had he got an inkling Anna regretted what had happened. Until now.

'What is it?' John squeezed the hand that was resting on Anna's shoulder, trying to encourage her to speak.

It's just...'

She stopped again. 'Anna, please tell me.'

Sitting up in bed, resting her elbows on her knees, Anna looked back at John over her shoulder. He was leaning on his arm, looking up at her with a furrowed brow. She smiled, alleviating his fears slightly. It seemed like an age had passed until she continued speaking.

'I know this is the way things must be but I love you so much. And sometimes, it just breaks my heart that we have to hide like this.'

'You're happy though, aren't you Anna? With me. Here.'

'Oh yes,' Anna nodded, the smile returning to her face. 'And we'll go back to Downton, then come back up here and carry on as we have done. It's just now I've had you completely, being without you for even one day already feels like torture. It will be like we are apart all over again, remembering that officially you belong to someone else and I don't want to feel like that. It was bad enough the first time.'

John sat up then, not breathing a word as he met Anna's lips with his own, gently pushing her back down onto her side of the bed. She responded eagerly, running her fingers through his hair, groaning into his mouth as his hand ghosted down the side of her body. Pulling away, John rested his head beside Anna's on her pillow.

'You know that I'm yours. unequivocally.' he whispered, Anna closing her eyes at the simply divine sensation of his breath hitting the shell of her ear. 'I am married, we can't change that. But please understand, although I am another woman's husband, my heart is yours. And only yours.'

* * *

Mrs Hughes stood outside the bathroom in the servants quarters, grimacing as she heard Anna being ill for the second time since she had arrived back at Downton. Stepping back as she heard Anna approach, the former housemaid opened the door.

'Anna dear, you look terrible,' Mrs Hughes said in her Scottish burr. 'Maybe I should call Doctor Clarkson?'

'No, I'll just go and have a lie down. I'm sure it was just the train journey.' Anna dismissed Mrs Hughes, closing the bathroom door behind her.

'Very well, shall I come back and call you when dinner is ready?'

'Please,' Anna replied with a smile. 'I am so grateful for you putting me up like this. Thank you.'

'It's a pleasure, Anna. It's lovely to have you home for a couple of days. But...' Mrs Hughes reached for Anna's left hand, lifting it from her side and indicating towards Anna's ring. 'You may want to lose this, if your situation is to remain private.'

* * *

Not able to eat anything at dinner time, her nausea and weakness overcoming her, Anna was sent back to bed by Mrs Hughes, with the promise Dr Clarkson would be around to check on her condition within the hour. She couldn't explain it, Anna would just have these unexplained bouts of sickness, then feel much better for a few hours until it would strike her once again. A knock on the door caused Anna to start a little.

'Come in,' she called, sitting up as Doctor Clarkson appeared, followed by Mrs Hughes.

'Hello Anna,' the doctor said with a smile. 'How have you been? How are your family?'

'Oh, erm,' Anna looked beyond the doctor at Mrs Hughes. This was the first time she had had to lie about her current situation, not making it much more than a couple of minutes into dinner with the others before she was forced to return to bed. 'They're fine, thank you Doctor.'

'Would you like me to stay, Anna?' Mrs Hughes asked.

'No, I'll be fine Mrs Hughes. I insist.'

The housekeeper left with a nod of the head, leaving the doctor and Anna alone. He preceded into the room, reaching for the chair in the corner of the room and carrying it so he could sit beside Anna.

'So, what appears to be the problem, Anna?'

'I feel a bit silly, really,' Anna began. 'I just have these periods where I am so sick I don't know what to do with myself. I also become so tired I have to lay down until it passes. It's the strangest thing, it's been happening since I got the news about Mrs Patmore, so I was wondering if that had something to do with it?'

'Grief does affect people in different ways,' Dr Clarkson agreed. 'Would you mind if I examined you? Just to see if there isn't anything more to it?'

'No, that's fine,' Anna said tentatively, lying down.

She couldn't be ill, could she? Not now. Not now she and John were together, with all their life ahead of them. She continued to ponder as the Doctor moved his hands around her stomach, pressing down slightly here and there. Chancing a look at the doctor's face, her heart was thundering as his expression was troubled. What had he found? What was he thinking? Anna wasn't sure she could bear it, what if she really was poorly? Finally, he spoke.

'Excuse me for being blunt, Anna. But when was your last cycle?'

Her cycle? Why would the man be asking her that? Searching for an answer to his question, suddenly everything fell into place.

'Over six weeks, but they have never run like clockwork.' Anna confessed, searching for Doctor Clarkson's gaze. She already knew the answer to her question. 'Why do you ask?'

The doctor sat down again, leaning forward before continuing. 'Anna, have you had relations with any man in the past few weeks?'

God yes. But how could Anna explain that to the man beside her without him changing his opinion of her? As far as he was concerned, she had just gone home to her family. Dr Clarkson had no idea about her actual whereabouts. She couldn't lie to him, but she couldn't tell him the truth either.

'Yes,' she whispered, almost too quietly to hear. 'I have.'

He nodded before making eye contact with Anna. 'You know what I'm going to say next.'

'I do.'

'I won't insult you by asking if you are in contact with the father. When you get home, get in touch with your family doctor. They will run some tests to confirm the pregnancy and advise you with what to do next.'

He rose to his feet then, leaving Anna completely flabbergasted by the news. However, she couldn't even consider beginning to come to terms with it without ensuring her reputation was kept in tact.

'Doctor Clarkson,' she called after him, the man turning to look at her as he reached the door. 'The father. I just want you to know that we are deeply in love with each other. This hasn't just happened after an ill advised moment together.'

'Oh Anna, I am certainly not one to judge,' he replied, grinning much to Anna's relief. 'The times are changing, war makes us do things we wouldn't usually consider doing. Just be careful.'

'Thank you. And I trust I can ask you not to tell anyone?'

'Confidentiality is part of my job description. Take care, Anna.'

With those words he left Anna alone with her thoughts. Pregnant. True, she and John had never done anything to prevent it, but to be told you are carrying a child is still a shock to the system. Anna had always wanted to be a mother, she knew that this felt right. Asking herself how she felt about it, she would be lying if she said she wasn't happy. Her overriding feeling was that she wanted to tell John, for him to hold her and tell her that everything was going to be alright. He wouldn't be arriving in Downton until the next day. How she longed to feel his touch, to be enveloped in his arms. She was right in her prediction, this was torture. However with the news she had just received, it only added to the pain.

* * *

'I received a telegram from Mr Bates saying he would be joining us,' Mr Carson announced as he came into the servants hall. 'He shall arrive any moment. So can we lay a place for him, please?'

'I'll do it,' Daisy announced, placing a dish of potatoes in the middle of the table.

'It's not your duty anymore, Daisy.' Mrs Hughes said gently.

'I want to do it. It reminds me of the old times. When Mrs Patmore were here.'

'I don't see why we should accommodate him,' Miss O Brien scowled, her eyes directed solely at Anna. 'He left us all in the lurch when he disappeared like that.'

'He wishes to pay his respects to Mrs Patmore,' Daisy argued, laying a place for John at the table, annoyingly for Anna a few spaces along from her and on the opposite side of the table.

'I'd wager it's going to be a bit awkward for you though, Anna.' Ethel remarked, looking at Anna over her magazine.

'We're both adults,' Anna breathed. 'I'm sure it will be fine.'

'He's got a lot of apologising to do if you ask me...'

'Well no one did ask you, Sergeant Barrow,' Mr Carson interrupted Thomas, before turning his attentions to Ethel. 'And how many times do I have to tell you about reading at the table at dinner, Ethel?'

'Hello.'

All eyes turned to the servants hall entrance to see John standing there, removing his hat and coat and hanging them up before entering the hall.

'Good evening, Mr Bates,' Mr Carson stood and shook the former valet's hand. 'I hope your journey was pleasant enough.'

'It was fine. Thank you.'

John immediately sought out Anna, finding her and discovering the temptation to smile too great as a flicker of a grin played upon his lips. She looked down, fearing what she might do if she maintained eye contact.

'There's a place for you,' Mrs Hughes continued. 'On the end I'm afraid. Mr Lang now occupies your old place.'

'Of course. I wouldn't expect to sit there anyway.'

John moved to the end of the table, sitting down before looking in Anna's direction. Her head was bowed, her face unreadable as dinner was served in silence.

'So, how is life with you, Mr Bates?' Thomas asked as they all began to eat. 'What have you been up to?'

'Oh, this and that,' John answered as he stabbed a carrot on his plate with his fork. 'I see you've been busy though, Thomas.'

'Sergeant Barrow, thank you very much,' O 'Brien corrected John in a stern voice. 'He works for Doctor Clarkson.'

'Oh, right,' John said dismissively, willing Anna to look up at him although she kept her gaze firmly on her dinner. 'What's it like? With all the soldiers convalescing here?'

'Oh, it's wonderful,' Ethel cooed. 'They're all so friendly.'

'With you maybe,' O Brien replied. 'We all know why they're friendly with you.'

'How have the house coped?' Anna said suddenly, lifting her head to look in the direction of Mr Carson. 'With Mrs Patmore's passing and all that?'

'They don't really notice,' Miss O Brien took it upon herself to answer the question. 'It was us who spent out time with her, not them. She just cooked their meals.'

'That's a little unfair,' Mrs Hughes argued. 'The family did provide a room so she could spend her last days in comfort.'

'Are you not hungry, Anna?'

Silence fell as they all heard John ask after Anna's welfare, only Mr Carson and Mrs Hughes knowing the truth, as well as O' Brien and Thomas. All the other servants knew was that John had left Anna, breaking her heart after having proposed to her. Anna lifted her head to look in John's direction.

'Not really, Mr Bates.' Anna replied, pushing a potato to the other side of her plate with her fork. He look concerned, and it broke Anna's heart. She offered him some reassurance, her lips upturned into a smile as she added. 'but it's nothing I can't handle.'

* * *

Once dinner had been eaten, the servants went about their tasks before they could retire for the evening. After saying his goodbye's to the housekeeper and the butler and making sure they had disappeared into Mr Carson's sitting room, John turned to Anna who was still sitting at the table, chatting to Daisy about how she was coping with the loss of Mrs Patmore. Anna was aware of him looking at her and for the first time that evening, looked beyond Daisy and flashed him a wide smile. John held up his hand, his fingers wide, Anna realising he was trying to tell her something. He was mouthing the words, 'meet me in five minutes,' and pointing in the direction of the back door. Anna nodded faintly, still listening to Daisy as she spoke about how hard it had been to cope without the cook. John left then, moving down the corridor and out into the courtyard.

'She was a wonderful woman,' Anna said, placing a hand on Daisy's upper arm. 'So kind.'

'She was,' Daisy agreed. 'I am going to miss her so much.'

She felt sorry for Daisy, Mrs Patmore was like a mother to her. However, the thought that superseded all others was the fact that Anna now had the opportunity to be with John alone, for the first time in over twenty four hours. And that meant she could share the news that she had longed to tell him ever since she had seen Doctor Clarkson. She was nervous, and unsure as to how he would react. But she trusted him, and knew he would be as happy about it as she was.

'I best be getting to bed,' Daisy murmured with a yawn, looking at the clock. She stood up and walked to the hall entrance. 'It's lovely having you here Anna. I wish you hadn't left.'

Anna responded with a grin and a nod of her head, before Daisy disappeared up the stairs. In the next moment Anna was in the hallway and hurtling towards the back door as fast as her legs would carry her. Opening the door, she searched the darkness for John. Suddenly, she made out his outline a few feet to her left. He had turned after the noise of the door opening startled him a little. No words were spoken as Anna made her way towards John. As soon as she reached him she threw her arms around his shoulders, emotions overtaking her as she began to sob openly on his shoulder. Through relief, more than anything.

'My darling, why are you crying?' John whispered, pulling Anna tight to him.

'I've just missed you so much,' Anna replied in-between sobs, clutching the material of his coat in her fists. 'Can we take a walk? There is something I would like to tell you. That I need to tell you.'

'What?' John pulled away so he could look into Anna's face. 'Is this about your illness? What's going on?'

She took hold of his hand. 'Walk with me.'

* * *

'Pregnant?'

He couldn't believe it. Anna had lead him to the grounds outside the house, far enough from prying eyes but close enough so they weren't in complete darkness.

'Yes.' Anna reiterated. 'I am pregnant.'

'But how?'

'Oh John,' Anna sighed. 'Do I have to draw you a picture?'

John rolled his eyes, tilting his head to the side a little before rephrasing his question. 'I mean, how do you know?'

'I was poorly when I arrived and Mrs Hughes insisted I see Doctor Clarkson.' Anna revealed. 'He examined me.'

'Wait a minute,' John stopped them walking and turned to face Anna. 'So he knows...'

'He knows nothing, John,' Anna interrupted. 'I did make a point of telling him this wasn't just a one off, that I was in love with the father. He doesn't know that it's you.'

'Right. That's good.'

They continued to walk in silence as John processed the news. Anna linked her arm through John's, chancing a look up at his face as he remained quiet. He was so difficult to read at times. A deeper thinker Anna had never known. The relief she felt was overwhelming as his features brightened, stopping them and turning to face Anna.

'I'm going to be a father.'

'You are.'

'And you're happy about it? All things considered.'

'John, I'm ecstatic.' Anna exclaimed, her enthusiasm causing John to let out a little chuckle. 'I have always wanted to be a mother, and the fact that a wonderful man, the man I love with my heart and soul is the father just makes it even more special. Are you pleased about it?'

'I just can't believe it,' John lead Anna to the bench they had stopped beside, encouraging her to sit down. He took hold of her hand, raising it to his lips and placing a small kiss across her knuckles. 'But I am thrilled.'

'I wish you could hold me tonight, that I could come back with you.'

'Darling, you know I want that too. But surely now, with this new development, it's even more important our secret remains just that? A secret.'

'I know, you're right.'

Placing his arm around Anna's shoulder, he pulled her closer to him, kissing her temple. John felt her shiver beneath his touch, standing up immediately. Taking off his coat, he helped Anna to her feet and placed his recently removed jacket around her shoulders.

'Come on, let's get you back. It's freezing out here.'

* * *

Walking back down the corridor towards the servants hall, Anna looked back over her shoulder at the door. She had just said goodbye to John, reluctantly handing him back his coat. She could still smell his scent all around her, closing her eyes and inhaling deeply for a moment it was like he was still standing beside her.

'Anna, are you alright?'

Opening her eyes, Anna saw Mrs Hughes standing at the top of the corridor, keys in hand. 'Thomas said he saw you walking outside and I've been waiting for you so I can lock up.'

'Oh, sorry.' Anna hurried down the remainder of the corridor as Mrs Hughes passed her, keys jangling in hand. Locking the door, Mrs Hughes turned back to see Anna deep in thought once more.

' I have just brewed some tea in my sitting room before I go up to bed. Would you like to join me?'

'That would be lovely.'

'It's wonderful Anna, if not the most perfect of circumstances.'

Deciding she needed to confide in someone about her news, Anna had revealed everything to Mrs Hughes. The housekeeper was happy for them both, if not totally enthusiastic about their situation. She knew that the two of them were committed to each other, and who was she to judge, really? Just because she was old fashioned in her views, didn't mean that it was her place to say what was happening between Anna and John was wrong. Their love for each other had always been plain to see.

'I wish things could be different, Mrs Hughes.' Anna took a sip of her tea as she considered what to say next. 'We are happy. And he treats me so well. I have been more of a wife to him than Vera ever was, he told me as much before I left to come down here. He told me that his heart belonged to me. And at the end of the day, that is all that matters really.'

'Indeed,' Mrs Hughes smiled warmly before glancing at the clock. 'I best be going up, it's going to be a difficult day tomorrow.'

'It certainly is,' Anna agreed, rising to her feet, Mrs Hughes followed her to the door. She opened the door then turned to face her former employer. 'I know I needn't ask this, but I can trust you to keep this to yourself? About my expecting a baby. John just wants this trip to pass without incident and if this got out, who knows what might happen.'

'Of course, my dear.'

Continuing out of the room, Anna nearly jumped out of her skin as she saw Thomas standing across from her and Mrs Hughes, dressed ready for bed, arms folded with a smirk on his face.

'Sergeant Barrow, what can I do for you at this late hour?' Mrs Hughes asked.

'Just making sure that the new linen for the soldiers beds had arrived.' Thomas replied, the smirk still etched across his face. 'I forgot the delivery was due this afternoon.'

'Yes, it arrived safely, Sergeant Barrow. Anything else?'

'No.'

Anna looked at him suspiciously before a feeling of dread spread throughout her entire body. Had Thomas just heard what she had said to Mrs Hughes?

'Good, I'm going up now,' Mrs Hughes carried on towards the stairs. 'Goodnight Anna.'

'Night,' Anna replied weakly, her gaze still on Thomas as he made to move towards the servant hall. 'Thomas.'

'Yes?'

Anna didn't know how to respond without revealing all about her and John. Thomas shifted impatiently on the soles of his feet, sighing deeply.

'Nothing, goodnight.'

'Goodnight Anna.' The sergeant watched as she walked up the stairs, and out of sight.

He had heard every single word.

* * *

'She's pregnant?'

'Yep. And it's his.'

'Blimey.' O Brien took a long drag on her cigarette before exhaling, the smoke drifting into the air on the early morning breeze. 'Didn't think the old man had it in him.'

Thomas chuckled at her statement. 'It's always the quiet ones.'

'Mrs Bates, the real one, isn't going to react kindly to this news.'

'You're going to tell her?'

'Of course I am,' O Brien replied without missing a beat. 'She deserves to know. I am meeting her in the village this morning to tell her what I know. I wrote to her letting her know Mr Bates was coming to the funeral. She intends to have it out with him.'

Thomas shook his head, smiling as he threw the remains of his smoked cigarette to the floor. 'You really have it in for that bloke, don't you?'

'I just don't think it's right. Running off to god knows where with another woman, making her his mistress. Living in sin. His wife deserves to know the truth. And I intend to tell her.'

**A/N 2- Next chapter- the proverbial might be hitting the fan. **


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N- Shes back...**

**Disclaimer: **Same as chapters 1-8

* * *

'Flaming woman,' O Brien stormed into the servants hall, Thomas was sitting alone, cup of tea in hand. He looked up at her, slightly annoyed to have his moment of peace disturbed. 'I take my only time off in the week to help someone, and she doesn't even bother to show.'

'Not a good morning, I take it?'

'No,' O Brien scowled, sitting down opposite Thomas. 'It wasn't.'

'Miss O Brien, you're back,' Mr Carson appeared in the servants hall. 'Her Ladyship was asking after you. She still needs to get ready for the funeral.'

'Yes Mr Carson,' her tone was short as she stood up. 'I'll go and get changed then see to her straight away.'

'Very well,' Mr Carson seemed satisfied with her response before turning on his heel and disappearing up the stairs.

'Perhaps you might leave Mr Bates to be, now,' Thomas remarked.

'What do you mean? It was you who had the problem with him in the first place.'

'When he took my job, yes. But I'm a sergeant in the army now. And Lang won't last much longer if his crazy act continues...'

'Don't talk about him like that.' O Brien interrupted, rubbing her brow.

'You're a funny one, you are,' Thomas took another sip from his cup. 'As I was saying, when the war is over, after Lang has been packed off, His Lordship will be begging for someone who has his head screwed on to tend to him morning, noon and night.'

'Still, Vera Bates deserves to know the truth. About her husband getting his mistress pregnant. I will make sure she gets to hear it. Somehow.'

* * *

Leaning against the church wall, she scanned the crowd. Everyone was wearing black, obviously. It was hard to distinguish one man from another unless you knew them well.

The she saw him. Unmistakable. His stance had never changed, despite the war wound he had received which made him less than half the man he was when she had met him. Even though anger pooled in her veins, she had more respect than to interrupt a funeral. Her 'sources,' as it were, told her he was staying at the pub in the village, leaving tomorrow. She would go and see him later that evening.

Vera smirked. John wouldn't know what had hit him.

* * *

Standing by the graveside, a chilly wind blowing around those gathered, staff and family stood united to pay their respects to Mrs Patmore. The Dowager Countess had insisted all the family be present, Lord Grantham agreeing wholeheartedly. Mrs Patmore had worked at Downton since His Lordship was a young man, she had been the cook before Mary had been born. It was only right they pay their respects.

John stood back, looking on as Anna supported Daisy. Despite the reason they were there, John couldn't help but think about what Anna had told him the previous evening. He felt his heart miss a beat as Anna looked up and found him in the crowd. She looked so upset. Anna had been at Downton long before John arrived, often referring to Mrs Patmore as being like a second mother. He wanted nothing more than to walk over to her, take Anna in his embrace and simply comfort her. Proprietary ruled his head, even though every other part of his body was screaming at him to move towards her.

As the vicar ended the ceremony, His Lordship encouraged his family to move away first. And that was when they came face to face. John held His Lordship's gaze, bowing his head slightly in acknowledgement of his former employer. His former comrade. Doffing his cap, Lord Grantham allowed his wife, mother and daughters to walk on ahead whilst he stopped to talk to John.

'Bates, how very good to see you.'

'Thank you, My Lord,' John replied, smiling slightly. 'If only it were in more happier circumstances.'

'Quite,' Lord Grantham agreed, looking over his shoulder at Daisy, now completely broken down as Anna and Mrs Hughes comforted her. 'Walk on with me, Bates.'

'Certainly, My Lord.'

'So, how are things? With, well... you know.'

'Fine, thank you,' John looked at His Lordship. 'We're very happy.'

'I'm glad. You know that Mrs Bates, the actual, err.. Mrs...'

'I understand, My Lord.' John had become accustomed to Lord Grantham's bumbling over the years.

'Yes. Well, we haven't seen nor heard from her since Sir Richard became involved.'

John chanced a look at the man who was now openly Lady Mary's fiancé. He had a look of power about him, and air of superiority. A perfect match for Lady Mary, he pondered to himself.

'No one knows of her whereabouts my Lord, as far as I am aware. And I am satisfied for it to remain that way.'

'Even given your situation? I am willing to aid you in attaining a divorce from her. God knows I owe you my life. It would be the least I could do.'

John shook his head. 'I wouldn't ask that of you, My Lord. If Vera turned up now, who knows what she would do. She has nothing left. As I said earlier, myself and Anna are very happy. What we are doing may be seen as wrong in the eyes of many, but we just don't see it that way. I don't want anything to jeopardise what we have built up together in Scotland.'

'You know best,' Lord Grantham remarked with a wistful sigh.

'And what about you, My Lord. How is life at Downton?'

'The war has brought many changes, as you may have heard when you came for dinner last night. But, we're still fighting. As the Crawley's always have.'

'Indeed, My Lord.'

'Come back to the house, Bates. there will be morning tea served, staff and family will be present. I insist.'

'Thank you, m'lord. That's very kind.'

With one last doff of his cap, Lord Grantham walked on to catch up with his family. John turned to see Anna walking with Daisy and Mrs Hughes. He stopped as they moved towards him, Anna lifting her head to acknowledge his presence ahead of them. Mrs Hughes recognised the silent link between the them both and led Daisy on ahead, leaving the two of them to walk alone behind them.

'Are you alright?' John whispered, his gaze travelling down to Anna's stomach.

'Perfectly, given the circumstances,' Anna replied, placing a hand where John's attention lay. 'And you?'

'All the better for finally getting you alone. Today must be difficult for you. I knew her as well, but not as well as you did. You have no idea how much I wanted to hold you when I saw you beside that grave.'

'And I would have welcomed that, Mr Bates.'

Silence fell between them then as they walked back to the house. No one seemed to pay much attention to the fact they had walked back side by side, despite believing the story they parted on disagreeable terms. After half an hour or so at the house, John decided he would make his way back to the Grantham Arms. He had never felt comfortable at these sorts of functions, particularly in a grand house such as this where he believed he had no right to be. After saying farewell to His Lordship, and Mr Carson and Mrs Hughes, John left with Miss O Brien's heady stare focussed solely on him as he whispered something to Anna. He disappeared then, Anna following shortly afterwards.

* * *

John stood in the courtyard, trying to keep as far hidden as he could as he waited for Anna to join him. He had felt awkward upstairs to say the least, it had always been the same even when he worked for the family. The cold air of the courtyard was a blessed relief, as would be when he was back on the train to Peterhead.

In the next moment, the door opened. John turned to see Anna stepping outside. He made his presence known, ushering her towards him before disappearing behind the stack of crates that had acted as his hideout. The sound of Anna chuckling at his act of espionage was music to his ears, the only thought in his mind was to swallow up her laughter in a kiss. She appeared to him, John stepping forward without a word and crushing his lips against hers. Anna placed her arms around John's shoulders to steady herself, the kiss nearly knocking her off her feet.

'God, I've missed you.' John's voice was raspy as he rested his forehead against Anna's. 'I didn't think it was going to be this hard.'

'I so wanted you beside me today, to support me. It's been such a terrible day.'

'Know that I wanted that too. But are you alright? Have you been ill today?'

'I was sick this morning,' Anna replied, but since then I've been fine. Tired but fine. I know I'll be feeling much better when we are back home, away from anything that might trouble us.'

John knew exactly what she meant. 'Why don't you come back with me tomorrow, instead of staying a day later?'

'As much as I want that, I promised Daisy I would stay. She's vulnerable at the moment. I couldn't bear to upset her.'

'Alright then, I'll stay an extra night. I just don't want to be at home without you. That night you came down before me was terrible. And this way, I know you will be getting home safely. Shall I buy us tickets for the half past three train?'

'That would be lovely, the train we took when we first went up there together was the half past three.'

'Trust you to remember that,' John murmured with a smile before brushing his lips against Anna's. 'Can I see you this evening, down the lane perhaps? Before it gets dark? See you both, even.'

As he placed a hand on Anna's stomach, her gasp was clearly audible as she placed her hand on top of John's. She couldn't believe that this man before her could get any more perfect, until his act of love towards their unborn child completely took her breath away.

'What's wrong?' he asked, his expression filled with concern as he stepped back to meet Anna's eyes with his own.

'Nothing,' Anna responded without missing a beat. 'It's just, I've imagined becoming a mother, but when you just said you'd see us both later, it made it seem more real to me. You're the father of my child, and I am certain no sweeter words have ever been spoken.'

'I love you.' It was all John could think of to say, but it perfectly summed up his thoughts in that moment.

'I love you too.'

As they shared another kiss, the door swinging open made them both jump, breaking away from each other abruptly. Anna peered around the stack of crates to see Ethel appear. Relieved it wasn't O Brien or Thomas, she looked back at John who was standing perfectly still. She leant up to kiss him on the cheek, resting her temple against his gently for the briefest of moments before whispering in his ear.

'I'll see you at the top of the lane tonight. Half past five. Don't be late.'

* * *

A surge of tiredness suddenly overcoming him, having not slept more than a couple of hours since he arrived in Yorkshire, John decided on laying down to rest before it would be time to meet Anna. After removing his waistcoat, tie, collar and shoes he lay down on the bed, closing his eyes and allowing his thoughts to drift to the subject that seemed to always bring him peace, his Anna.

As he was slowly drifting off, his half sombre like state was unexpectedly interrupted by a knock on his hotel door. Furrowing his brow, Anna couldn't have followed him here, surely, he got up and walked to the door. Upon opening it, John couldn't believe his eyes as he took in the presence standing before him.

'Well, well, well, what have you been up to, Mr Bates?'

'Vera,' he uttered under his breath, feeling his whole world crashing down around him. 'What, I mean how...'

'How did I find out you were here? Let's just say I made some friends at Downton when I came to find you the first time.'

John knew exactly the kind of 'friend,' Vera was meaning.

'What did Miss O Brien tell you?'

'Let me in, and I'll tell you all about it.'

Stepping aside, Vera moved into the room. John watched her every move as she looked around the room, taking in the sight of Anna's picture on the bedside cabinet.

'Shouldn't that be a picture of me, John? I am your _lawful _wife after all.'

'Lawful wife, yes. But not in any other sense.' John's words were harsh, Vera's demeanour instantly turning more angry. He exhaled deeply, before sitting down on the bed opposite the chair Vera had claimed as her own. 'What do you want from me, Vera?'

'I have you exactly where I want you, John.'

'I knew blackmail would be a part of it.' He rolled his eyes before meeting her gaze.

'Money. That's what I want. You have your mother's house, you must be rolling in it.'

'How much?'

'A couple of hundred, three maybe...'

'Three hundred pounds?' John exclaimed, standing up immediately and limping over to the window, Vera looking on in disgust at his disability. He put his hands in his pockets and stood staring out of the window. 'And what do I get in return?'

' A divorce, never having to see each other again and believe me, that is fine by me. I have family in Australia, I want to move out there. The money will give me the opportunity to rebuild a life that you destroyed...'

'You'll give me a divorce?' John's voice was barely a whisper as he turned to look at Vera.

'Yes. So you'll be glad you won't have to live in sin with your little whore anymore.'

'Don't.' John's eyes were screwed tight as he tried to stop his anger escalating. 'Don't call her that. And what if I refuse to give you this money?'

'I'll blow your cover. I'll tell the world the sham you've been living and I'll drag Miss Smith's name through the mud. And the gagging order won't stop me either. Prison would mean nothing to me, I have nothing as it is.'

'Can you meet me in the village tomorrow? I should be able to sort out the money by then.'

'Very well.' Vera stood up then, and moved to the door. 'I'll be in the tea rooms tomorrow afternoon.'

* * *

A few hours had passed, Vera walking through the village to get her bus to Ripon after spending the afternoon in the Grantham Arms. She was surprised to see Miss O Brien leaving the post office. Feeling guilty for missing their arranged meeting, she decided to approach the ladies maid. As soon as their eyes made contact, Vera knew there was something she was hiding.

'Good day, Miss O Brien. I am so sorry to have missed our meeting yesterday, my train was late.'

'It's no bother,' Miss O Brien replied, a small smile on her lips as she remembered the small bit of information she had learnt in the past couple of days. 'Have you seen Mr Bates?'

'I have,' Vera replied, looking back towards the Grantham Arms.

'Did he tell you about the baby?'

Miss O Brien knew exactly what she was doing as she watched Vera turn her attentions back to her in disbelief.

'What baby?'

'Oh yes,' Miss O Brien continued, a satisfied smile her expression. 'They've been very busy.'

'I can't believe it,' she breathed, Miss O Brien surprised to see a line of tears glisten in Vera's eyes. 'He never once mentioned starting a family with me, and I was married to the man.'

'That's just him all over. Selfish to a fault.'

'Well, I won't let this happen. Money or no money. He won't humiliate me in this way. If he didn't start a family with me, he sure as hell isn't starting one with her.'

* * *

Anna's face was the picture of happiness as John filled her in on Vera's visit. She agreed the money was easily attainable and so worth it if it meant they could get rid of Vera for good, she had been casting a shadow on their union for far too long. They sat out of view down the lane. The pleasant weather deeming the ground to not be too damp meant John sat with his back against a tree, Anna settled between his legs, both dreaming of the future and what lay ahead. Their wedding, when the time eventually came, would have to be a quiet affair seeing as everyone they knew already believed them to be married. John promised Anna a white dress, she deserved that much although Anna insisted she would marry John wearing anything, so long as she could call him her husband at the end of it.

Now back in his hotel room, the means to get the funds Vera had requested complete, John settled down to read a book Anna had taken from His Lordship's library to read. As he opened the front cover, a little note fell out. Picking it up from the bed beside him, he began to read it.

_My dearest John, how I wish I could be beside you, with you reading this book to me. It hurts that I can't be with you, but know that I, and the little one, are missing you like mad. _

_Your Anna x_

John held the note in his hand for a moment, lost in his thoughts before a loud knocking at his door disrupted him from his moment of contemplation. Standing up with a groan, he walked over to the door. Before he had opened it, someone was barging to get inside.

Vera.

'You dirty bastard,' she spat as John closed the door. 'You vicious swine.'

'Excuse me?'

'Going to be a father are we? Playing happy families with your little tart? Did you really think I'd let you get away with this?'

'What? How did you find out...'

'Sarah O Brien has a lot to say for herself,' Vera interrupted. 'Another woman you must have scorned in some way in the past.'

'Vera, I have made your funds available. Tomorrow you will get your money so you can move to Australia.'

She let out an awful laugh, one which sent shivers down John's spine. 'I'll be damned if I let you get away with this now. Do you know how humiliating it is to hear your husband has got his bit on the side pregnant, when he wouldn't have even contemplated starting a family with me?'

'What does it matter to you? You want rid of me as much as I want rid of you.'

'No,' she replied, shaking her head. 'I want to make you as miserable as you have made me. And if that means making you stay with me, then so be it. If one of us is unhappy, we shall both be unhappy.'

'Vera, that will never...'

'Here's the deal, John.' Vera moved to the door, not willing to listen to her husband any longer. 'You come back to London with me tomorrow, or I will tell everything. About your little sordid affair with that bitch, about Lady Mary and the Turk, and about that bastard baby.'

He turned away at her final words, the pure hatred as she said them causing his temper to become shorter. He knew what he was capable of, it was taking all the strength he could muster not to act out on his anger. He could cope with her threat of revealing all about Lady Mary, but hearing her chastise the love of his life and their unborn child was too much. However, the story of Mary and the Turkish gentleman was the only thing that would damage Vera, and this was reverberating around his head as he formulated his response.

'You'll go to prison, or worse. Sir Richard will see to that.'

'Perhaps, but I'll be ruining your new perfect little life in the process, and that will make it worth it.'

With these words she left. John knew he had to do something, and fast. Going with Vera simply wasn't an option. He knew one thing. He would have to leave Downton as soon as possible. And in secret. For all he knew, Vera would follow them. She would tell all about Lady Mary, the news threatening to ruin a family. That didn't sit well with John but circumstances had changed since he and Anna had left for Scotland.

John had his own family to think about now.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N- This has taken me from ten this morning to write, it's now 9.20pm. I love a day spent writing fan fiction. Thanks for your reviews. **

**In this chapter, Lord Grantham steps up to the plate. And Mr Branson makes an appearance. What a charming fellow he is. **

**Disclaimer:**_ Downton belongs to Julian Fellowes/ITV/Carnival_

* * *

Mrs Hughes stepped out of her sitting room before moving to the top of the corridor. Her ears hadn't been deceiving her. There was an incessant banging on the back door which had first caught her attention, but now it was coupled with a voice, that of a man shouting. Making haste towards the back door, she soon recognised the voice to be that of Mr Bates.

'Why, Mr Bates...'

'Mrs Hughes, you have to give this to Anna.'

He was panic striken, handing over a bundle of notes that must have added up to around fifty pounds. It had been raining, John was dripping wet and he had stepped out without properly dressing himself, missing his tie, collar and hat. And his cane. He was clutching his bag.

'Mr Bates, compose yourself. What is going on?'

'I have to go back to Scotland. Now. I am getting the overnight train, it leaves Downton in an hour to connect with the early morning service from Newcastle to Aberdeen. Give the money to Anna and ask her to follow me tomorrow. She's booked on the ten o clock train. Vera's back and she is throwing around all kinds of threats.'

'Threats? About Lady Mary?'

'Look, there isn't time...'

'John?' He looked beyond Mrs Hughes to see Anna come down the stairs, ready for bed with a shawl wrapped around her shoulders. 'What is it?'

'Ahh good, the door is open. I left something here at dinner and...' Tom Branson appeared then behind John, and noticing the atmosphere immediately stopped talking. 'Is everything alright?'

'Anna and Mr Bates, use my sitting room.' Mrs Hughes turned her attentions back to John. 'Talk to her.'

Looking at his pocket watch, John nodded before walking inside, closing the door behind him. Mrs Hughes stepped aside as John strode down the corridor, leaving drips of water behind as he neared Anna. Her face was full of confusion and fear, it broke John's heart. She led the way, turning towards Mrs Hughes sitting room, pulling her shawl more tightly around her shoulders.

'What was all that about?' Tom asked.

'Just don't go anywhere.' Mrs Hughes replied, looking on as the couple disappeared into her room before placing a hand on Mr Tom's shoulder. 'You might be needed.'

In the sitting room, John removed his sopping wet coat and hung it over the back of one of the chairs before placing his bag on the floor. Turning to face Anna, he met her gaze and stared at her. She was looking so vulnerable, so scared. All of a sudden, the only thing he felt was guilt. Guilt that this beautiful, perfect woman had given up everything for him, her self respect to live in a manner with him that they had no right to. And now, his wife was threatening to drag her name through the mud, all because of him.

'What's going on, John?' Anna's voice was barely a whisper. 'What's happened?'

'Vera's happened. She's found out about the baby.'

'What? How?'

'Miss O Brien knows everything. Our secret. That's why Vera is here in the first place.'

Anna raised a trembling hand to her mouth, a realisation suddenly spreading throughout her body. 'If she knows everything and has told Vera, that's it. Cover blown.'

John nodded weakly. 'And the money means nothing now. If I didn't want a family with her, she isn't going to let me start one with you. I either go to London with her tomorrow, or she tells all. About Lady Mary. About us.'

'So it's coming out in the open no matter what.' Anna looked over at John. 'You're not considering going back to her...'

'God no,' John interrupted Anna, stepping closer to her.

'But it will ruin the family...'

'I don't care about that, Anna. The only two people I care about are you and the baby. You are the centre of my universe, nothing else matters. That's why I am going back now, So she won't know where I am and she can't follow me.' John placed a hand on Anna's cheek, closing his eyes tightly as he choked out his next words. 'Unless you want me to go with her, to save Lady Mary's plight. Because I would do that. For you.'

Anna felt her chest tighten at the thought of John going back to Vera. It just couldn't happen, no matter what would materialise for the Crawley family. The fact that John would be willing to make that sacrifice for her made her heart swell and made her feel angry all at once. How he could even think for a second Anna could live without him was beyond her. Especially now she was expecting their first child. He was her life now, they had built that life together far away from here. She wasn't willing to give that up for anybody, not even Lady Mary.

'Does Vera know where we are living?'

'No.'

'Well then, we leave together. Now if needs be. What's to stop her from following me? We must go together. Leave a note with Mrs Hughes to pass on to his Lordship.'

'Anna, this is all my doing...'

'So you forced Mary to sleep with Mr Pamuk, did you?' Anna's voice was strong, full of conviction as John looked her squarely in the eye. He shook his head. 'No, you didn't. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but it's a mistake Lady Mary made in the past. I don't see why you should have to pay for it just because your wife is a wicked creature only out for what she can get. And I'm sure His Lordship would like to hear all about O Brien's part in it aswell.'

'Anna, I don't deserve you.' He placed a strong hand on her stomach. 'Or any of this.'

'Stop it,' Anna breathed. 'Don't say that. You, John Bates, are a wonderful, selfless man who came into my life little more than five years ago and all of a sudden gave it meaning. It took us long enough to reach this point. It may not be perfect, or proper in the eyes of some, but it's what I have always wanted. To love someone like this. You are what I have always dreamt of. So don't ever say you don't deserve me.'

'We're in this together, then,' John said with a chuckle, taking Anna's hand in his own.

'How you could even think otherwise angers me. I made a promise to you. Under the stars on our first night in Scotland. I meant every single word.'

'Me too.'

'So I suggest you write a letter to His Lordship explaining that Vera might be visiting him in the near future. And to alert Mr Murray and Sir Richard. I'll go and pack my bag and meet you in the servants hall in ten minutes.'

Reaching the servants hall, John was surprised to see Mrs Hughes and Mr Branson sitting at the table, deep in conversation. Mrs Hughes turned to acknowledge his presence, Mr Branson smiling weakly in his direction.

'Mr Bates, I hope you don't mind but I had an idea.'

'All packed, let's go,' Anna took hold of John's arm before realising Branson was present.

'Before you do, Anna.' Mrs Hughes stood up and moved towards them both, Mr Branson standing. 'I took the liberty of explaining the situation to Mr Branson.'

'Don't worry, I won't tell anyone.' Tom said with a smile. 'I want to help.'

'Help how?' John crumpled his brow before looking down at Anna.

'Well, I thought if Mr Branson drove you as far as he could, it would get you further away from here sooner.'

'I couldn't ask that of you,' John began before Tom interrupted.

'Please, let me do this for you. The subject matter is a lot closer to home than I would care to admit.' Mrs Hughes made a noise at his remark, Anna and John sharing confused glances.

'But won't you have to clear it with Mr Carson?' John questioned. 'And His Lordship.'

'Leave them both to me,' Mrs Hughes replied indignantly.

'Alright then, thank you. If Mr Branson doesn't mind.'

'I'll go and fire up the car. '

Leaving the three of them alone, Branson almost ran down the corridor.

'Won't anyone hear us leaving?'

'Don't worry about that, Mr Bates,' Mrs Hughes replied. 'Leave it all to me.'

'This is goodbye then. I hope you don't mind I borrowed some of your stationery. Please give this letter to His Lordship.' John asked, handing Mrs Hughes an envelope before leaning down to kiss her on the cheek. 'We'll never forget this, Elsie.'

Taken aback at him using her given name, Mrs Hughes blushed a little before Anna took the housekeeper in her embrace. 'Tell Daisy everything. Please. I'm sorry to let her down but please let her know why I have to go back early. So she'll understand.'

'As you wish. Do take care of yourselves. I'll write to let you know how the dust settles. Now go.'

* * *

Seven o clock in the morning passed as Branson pulled up outside Edinburgh train station. Having only stopped once, they had made the journey in a little over eight hours, Branson pushing the car to it's limits as they travelled through the night. They had revealed all about the past few months, safe in the knowledge Tom would keep their secret. He mentioned something to them about forbidden love which intrigued them both but they chose not to press the issue with him. Stepping out of the car, such as was his nature, he moved around to Anna's side and opened the door.

'Good luck,' he said with a smile, helping Anna out of the car.

'We really can't thank you enough, Mr Branson.' John said, taking hold of his bag and Anna's.

'Is it easy to get home from here?' Tom asked, shutting the car door.

'Yes, we take the train to Aberdeen.' John answered before looking behind him at the station. 'Which reminds me, I'll go and find the station master and ask him if I can phone George, to come and collect us.'

'Alright, I'll be with you in a minute.' Anna replied, watching as John walked away. 'Thanks for this, Tom.'

'Honestly, it's fine. Mrs Hughes assured me she would explain to Mr Carson and His Lordship. They'll both understand when they hear the reasons behind it.'

'This forbidden love, I hope it works out for you.' Anna rubbed the top of his arm. 'It's worked for me.'

'You both look really happy together,' Tom commented with a grin, dismissing Anna's remark. 'I saw you holding hands in the back of the car.'

'It's not ideal, but we are happy, yes.'

'And you're going to be parents. That's wonderful news. Really, it is. Anyone who sees you both together knows that you were meant to be. Marriage is only a piece of paper after all.' Tom pointed to his chest before continuing. 'At the end of the day, what really matters is what's going on in here.'

'Anna, the train leaves in five minutes.' Tom and Anna turned to see John calling at her from the station entrance.

'You best go. Take care, Anna.'

'And you, Mr Branson.'

* * *

'Come in,' Lord Grantham announced, sighing slightly as Mr Lang fumbled about with his task. Mr Carson stepped into the dressing room, raising his eyebrows as Lang dropped a set of cufflinks on the floor.

'My Lord, would you mind if I had a word?'

'Not at all. I think I can manage here now Lang. Thank you.' Mr Lang nodded, leaving the room in double quick time as Mr Carson bent to retrieve the cufflinks. Lord Grantham noticed he was carrying an envelope. 'What's that, Carson?'

'A letter, My Lord. There have been some developments over night.'

'What on earth do you mean?'

'Mr Bates and Anna have had to leave unexpectedly.' Carson explained. 'Mr Branson has driven them as far as he can, to hasten their exit. He will be back by afternoon tea.'

Mr Carson handed the letter to Lord Grantham. His look troubled, he took the envelope and ripped it open. Reading the contents, he could scarcely believe what he was reading.

'Mrs Bates is reigniting her threats, despite the gag Sir Richard enforced. He apologises for leaving like this, but he simply has to put Anna and...' He stopped reading, bringing a hand to his mouth as he struggled to process what he was reading.

'My Lord?' Mr Carson implored, confused by his employers sudden silence.

'He has to put Anna and the baby first.'

'Baby?'

Lord Grantham offered the letter to Carson before moving to the window. 'What is this infernal secret Mrs Bates thinks will ruin my family?'

'Sorry to interrupt My Lord, the door was open so I assumed you were dressed.' Both men turned to see Mrs Hughes appear at the door.

'Yes, Mrs Hughes.' Mr Carson addressed the housekeeper and her panicked state.

'Mrs Bates. She's here and she would like to speak with you, My Lord. She says it is urgent.'

'Very well, take her to my library. If I am to find out what Lady Mary is hiding, it might as well be now.'

* * *

Walking into his library, this was the first time Lord Grantham had come face to face with the woman who claimed she held the key to destroying his family. He couldn't fathom why Bates had married her in the first place.

'Mrs Bates, I take it.'

'Lord Grantham,' Vera smirked. 'How very nice...'

'Let's skip the pleasantries, shall we?' Lord Grantham hissed, walking further into the room. 'What do you want?'

'Do you know why I am here?'

'Mr Bates has left, so no. I have no idea.'

'Mr Bates is exactly the reason why I am here. He didn't do as I requested, so now I am going to wreak some misery of my own.'

'Really. How so?'

'Sir Richard has tried to stop me from revealing your eldest daughters disgusting secret. But now I have nothing left to live for, a prison sentence doesn't phase me.'

'Why are you doing this?' Lord Grantham asked, moving to sit on the chair beside his desk. 'Bates has left, he's not coming back. You have no idea where he is. Why cause my family any pain? What is that going to achieve?'

'Nothing, in the grand scheme of things.' Vera answered with a small laugh. 'But it will make me feel a whole lot better. I don't like being humiliated, it might have something to do with that. So someone else can see how it feels.'

'How much?'

'I'm sorry?'

Lord Grantham pulled his cheque book from one of the drawers on his desk before throwing it on the top. 'Name your price. I don't like to use my wealth in this way, but if I have to so be it. How much for you to leave me, and one of my oldest friends, in peace.'

'This isn't fair. He is my husband. He should be with me.'

'Five hundred pounds. Here.' Lord Grantham ripped the written cheque from the book and offered it in Vera's direction. 'You could start a new life with that money.'

Vera looked down at the cheque. She saw her name. The amount that was written. She could do a lot with that amount of money. Begrudgingly, she took the piece of paper and placed it in her handbag.

'This isn't over. I'll keep your daughter's sordid little secret for now, but I won't stop the search for John. He deserves to pay.'

Robert stood up and walked towards Vera, his eyes never losing their contact with hers. 'Just leave my house.'

* * *

'The doctor thinks I'm over six weeks gone,' Anna explained as she and John took a walk beside the river, hand in hand. 'Everything appears normal. I just need to take things easy and not encounter any undue stress. So it's lucky we came back up here when we did.'

'Indeed,' John agreed, looking down at Anna with a smirk on his lips.

They had been back in Scotland for a few days, Anna finding it difficult to find a doctor's appointment in the remote area they lived in. It took a trip to Aberdeen with George in the van, John staying back to cover his cousin's shift at the pub to find a doctor who would be willing to travel to Peterhead when the time came for Anna to give birth. A telegram was received the day after they had arrived back in Scotland from Lord Grantham. He had explained he had bought Vera's silence, but she had promised to not give up the search for her husband. John still firmly believed she had no way of finding them, and that life could go on as normal. The only people who knew where they were wouldn't give them away.

'So, it's official. We are going to have a baby.' Anna couldn't keep the smile from her face, John bending down to place a kiss on her upturned lips. 'Isn't it wonderful?'

'I have no idea what I did to get so lucky,' John said in return. 'But I am certainly not going to question it.'

'Do you have any preferences? A boy or a girl? Names? Lord, I'm so excited.'

John laughed at Anna's enthusiasm, gathering her up in his arms, allowing his cane to clatter to the ground. He span her around a couple of times, bathing in her laughter as it invaded his senses. He had never felt as happy in all his life as he did in this moment. Placing her back on the ground, he kept his arms around her waist, pulling her tighter to him.

'I really don't mind. So long as you and our baby are healthy at the end of it all, that is all that matters. What would you like?'

'I don't mind either, like you say, so long as all is well,' Anna watched as John picked up his cane before taking his hand once again. 'I'd always had visions of a daughter. Sharing that bond that could only exist between a mother and her daughter. And I think you would be the most adorable father to a little girl.'

'Really?' John raised his eyebrows as they continued walking again, a small grin his expression. 'I can honestly say I had never really thought about children. Until I met you. Everything changed, my outlook on life, what I believed in. It seems like the most natural thing in the world to be starting a family with you.'

'Mama and Papa,' Anna said out loud, a small laugh following her words.

'God no,' John dismissed her suggestion with a chuckle. 'What do you call your parents?'

'Mum and Dad. What did you call yours?'

'Mother and Father, but bear in mind I have nearly twenty years on you. Being called Dad would suit me just fine.'

'Yes, I do often forget how much older than me you are,' Anna said, hoping John would spot the joviality in his tone. Her hopes were realised when she felt his hands tickling her at her ribs, his cane once again abandoned on the floor. 'Stop, please.'

Their bodies were much closer now, John instantly recognising this fact as his arms tightened themselves around Anna's waist, his breath hitching.

'You've never been one to complain about my experience before.' John remarked through raised eyebrows, his voice almost like a growl. 'In fact, you've been quite willing for me to teach you what life has taught me.'

'Oh yes, Mr Bates. There is nothing I like more than a good lesson from you. Your ever willing pupil.'

Brushing his lips against Anna's, John looked left and right before moving to whisper in Anna's ear. 'Can I take you home? So long as you're sure it won't harm the baby, I've suddenly thought what the subject for today could be.'

'Well, safe in the knowledge any ministrations will cause the baby no harm at all, how can I very well refuse, Mr Bates? We are living in sin, after all. We might as well make the most of it.'

* * *

**A/N 2- I spent some time doing research (when I say research I mean Google) and it seems most motor cars had a top speed of 40mph or so in the 1910's. So that is how I have timed their journey.**

**And as for Mum and Dad, Anna referred to her Mother as Mum, and Daisy referred to William's father as his Dad. I personally just can't see Anna and John wanting to be called mama and papa, or ma and pa. But that might just be me. **


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N - Apologies if this is similar to writings in '_A Forbidden Attraction_.' Truth is I made this chapter harder than it needed to be. Google wasn't forthcoming in helping with my research (surprise surprise), so if there are any historical inaccuracies can we overlook them, and not lynch me. Ta :)**

**Disclaimer:** _Downton belongs to Julian Fellowes/ITV/Carnival_

* * *

It was clear from early on that there was something different about Anna's pregnancy. She began showing very quickly, much sooner than normal. And then, on a routine appointment the doctor confirmed it. Travelling back in the van with George, she couldn't keep the grin from her face. She wouldn't reveal anything, wanting John to be the first to know. The journey seemed to last longer than usual, Anna willing it to end so she could share her news with the man she loved. Bounding into The Swan, she sought out John immediately, locating him cleaning glasses behind the bar. Looking up, his expression was puzzled as she almost ran to him, a smile as wide as he had ever seen illuminating Anna's face.

'Afternoon,' John bowed his head, a smirk upon his lips. 'I trust the appointment went well?'

'Can I talk to you? Maybe we could go for a walk?'

John looked over Anna's shoulder at George, who was already walking behind the bar before taking the glass and cloth from John. 'Go on. Myself and Harold can cope here. Take the rest of the day.'

'George, I...'

'John,' he replied sternly, almost pushing his cousin out of the way. 'Go.'

Once outside, Anna was still revealing nothing as she lead John in the direction of the brook nearby. They walked in near silence, John's mind going into overdrive. She seemed happy, he was pretty certain nothing was wrong. Reaching the bench that sat on the middle of the bridge, Anna encouraged John to sit down with her.

'Are you going to tell me now?' John asked, waiting for Anna to get comfortable before sitting beside her. He rested his cane against the bench. 'The suspense is killing me.'

She turned to him, her face beaming before taking his hand in hers. John looked down at their entwined fingers, Anna's thumb gently making patterns on the back of his hand. 'It's twins, John.'

'I'm sorry?' He looked up in disbelief, his eyes meeting Anna's. 'Twins?'

'The doctor said I am larger than a woman should be this far gone in the pregnancy. He examined me and is certain.'

Standing up, John limped forward a couple of paces. Anna's heart was beating so hard she could almost hear it thunder in her ears, nervous to John's reaction. She needn't have been. He turned around, his face the picture of happiness as Anna stood up.

'Looks like I'll need to take on some extra shifts at the pub, doesn't it?' John said with a chuckle, moving closer to Anna. He rested his forehead against hers, her hands in his and his voice barely a whisper. 'Twins, Anna. How are we ever going to manage with twins?'

'I don't know,' Anna answered with a shrug before chuckling. 'One each, I would imagine.'

* * *

Weeks had turned into months since that conversation had taken place. Two of everything had been bought. Anna was positively blooming as her pregnancy progressed, seemingly without major incident. Her doctor would be bringing a colleague to assist in the delivery, the birth to take place at their cottage. Anna was now due to give birth at any moment, having been advised that twins are more often than not premature. George had been very generous in granting John time off to spend with Anna, particularly as the due date came nearer.

'We're a right pair,' John joked as Anna joined him in the back garden. She lowered herself onto the bench he was sitting on, John instinctively moving over to allow her more room. 'You hobbling about ready to give birth any moment, me with my knee.'

'You think this is bad, wait until they're older when we have two little ones to chase around.'

John placed his arm around Anna's shoulder's before replying. 'Well, by that time you would have lost the tummy, my love. It will be much easier for you to keep up with them.' He noticed she was holding a letter. 'News from Downton?'

'Just that Daisy is proving herself an excellent head cook, but William is missing in action. And Captain Crawley.'

'I'm very sorry to hear that,' John replied sincerely.

'But they are remaining positive. No news is good news.'

'Indeed. Anything else in the letter?'

'There is no news of Vera, seems Lord Grantham's bribe may have done the trick. Mrs Hughes likens her to Harry Houdini.'

'Now that's an insult,' John began, edging closer to Anna. 'To Houdini.'

Anna remained silent, staring ahead at the evening sun as it bathed the garden. John had noticed her becoming lost in her thoughts more and more, especially as her pregnancy came to term. He gently squeezed her knee.

'Are you alright, Anna?'

She turned to look at him, a weak smile on her face. 'Of course. Why?'

He wasn't convinced. 'What's troubling you?'

'If I told you I was scared would you deem me terribly ridiculous?'

'Scared of what, exactly? Becoming a mother?'

'No, not that.' Anna shook her head before looking up at John. 'The part before that. Giving birth. The thought of it is bad enough with one baby, but two.'

'That's not ridiculous, that's natural my darling. But you're not going to be alone. The doctors will be with you, Agnes, Emily...'

'But not you.'

'No. Not me.'

'You see, ever since we ran away together you've been my strength. I've looked to you in times of trouble and the one time I need you the most you're not going to be there.'

'Believe me, Anna. It's not my choice...'

'I know that, I know it's not the done thing to have the father present. I just wanted to tell you what was on my mind.'

'And I appreciate that.' John took Anna's hand in his. 'But I hope you know even though I can't be beside you, I'll be with you. Nothing is going to change that.' As Anna rested her head on John's shoulder, he gently kissed the top of her head. 'I'll be downstairs. No doubt pacing the floor, or limping the floor...' Anna began to chuckle then and it was music to John's ears. 'I won't be far away, I promise.'

* * *

And then the day arrived, two weeks from Anna's due date.

John's mind was clearly elsewhere as he dropped what was his third glass of the lunchtime shift. George rolled his eyes as he bent down to clear up the mess, John fumbling and extremely apologetic. Anna hadn't been herself that morning, and it was all John could think about. Nothing else mattered, not beer glasses or changing barrels. Just Anna.

Although the area they had moved to meant they could live their life as they chose to, he wished there was a hospital closer by. Giving birth was dangerous as it was with one baby, but Anna was strong and he knew that she would be absolutely fine. Her doctor, Doctor Harris, had reassured Anna he would do everything within his power to ensure a safe delivery for both the babies and mother. John had to admit he felt slightly better in the knowledge that Doctor Harris's colleague, Doctor May had delivered twins in the past. Anna would be in good hands.

'Look John, why don't you clean some tables?' George suggested, pointing out into the seating area. 'I'll clear this mess up.'

'Alright. I am sorry George, I'm all over the place today.'

Suddenly the door swung open, Emily was out of breath as she approached the bar. 'John, it's started.'

'What?' John could barely process the meaning of Emily's words.

'Quick, the birth. Her waters have broken. Ma is over there with her now, Anna's calling for you. She wants you.'

'I'll call Doctor Harris,' George announced, disappearing into the back room.

'Is she alright?' John began to untie his apron before throwing it on the bar.

'She's fine, it's early stages so far. But the babies are definitely on their way.'

George reappeared. 'Dr Harris and his colleague are leaving now. You go, I'll be with you later.'

'George, you really don't have to...'

'No John.' George was insistent as he ushered John and Emily towards the door. 'I promised you I'd keep you company, we just won't open this evening. People will understand why. Anna might be doing all the hard work, but it's not going to be easy for you either. You need someone with you.'

'Only if you are...'

'For heaven's sake, John. Go to Anna. She needs you. I'll be over as soon as I can.'

John followed Emily across the street then, realising after a few steps he had forgotten his cane at the pub but the thought of returning for it never entered his mind. He was almost running by the time they reached his garden gate, Emily pushing it open before allowing John to walk past her. He stopped to look at her as a cry from inside caught his attention. Anna. Emily offered him a warm smile, placing a reassuring hand on the top of his arm.

'It's all going to be alright.'

Closing his eyes, John bowed his head as another of Anna's cries filled the air. 'I'm scared, of what I'm going to see when I get in there.'

'You can't think like that, John. She needs you to be strong for her. Now, come on. She was asking for you.'

Keeping a tight grip on John's arm, Emily lead him to his front door. Opening it gently, she stepped inside, John following gingerly before shutting the door behind him. Taking a deep breath, he allowed Emily to walk on ahead to the living room. She opened the living room door and that was the first glimpse John saw of Anna. She was sitting on a dining room chair, leaning over the table. Agnes was beside her, rubbing her back. John could feel his heart breaking with every step closer he took.

Anna was in pain and there was absolutely nothing he could do about it.

'Ah, look who is here, Anna.'

Agnes stepped aside so Anna could look up. She met John's gaze, her eyes swollen with crying from the pain, her brow glistening with the residue of her exertion, but she was still able to afford him a weak smile.

'Hello,' she gasped.

'Hello.'

Then silence fell as John and Anna's eyes remained locked on each other.

Agnes indicated to Emily it might be an idea to give John and Anna some space. The two women left, leaving John and Anna alone. He closed the distance between them, ignoring the complaints of his knee to bend down beside her.

'Doctor Harris is on his way,' John informed Anna, she wincing as another contraction began to over take her. John was in despair, he had no idea what to do as Anna gripped tightly onto his hand. Closing his eyes, he pressed a gentle kiss to her temple as she squeezed his hand tightly.

'It hurts so much. I don't think I can do it, John.'

How could he respond? What could he do to reassure Anna that everything would be fine when he was just as frightened as she was? John knew one thing and that was that he couldn't voice his fears to Anna. She needed to know that John believed in her. She had fought for him enough times in the past, now it was his duty to return the favour. She had always been his strength, his support, always there with an encouraging word of how life could be. Now Anna needed him to be the same.

John moved closer so he could whisper in Anna's ear. 'You know I'd do anything to make this easier for you. It's out of my control, and you have no idea how much I hate that, Anna. But know this. You are the strongest, most courageous woman I know. And you can do this. I know you can.'

'Thank you,' Anna brushed her forehead against John's, her eyes tightly closed. 'It's just I don't know what I'd do if things went wrong. With one of the babies. Or both...'

If John was honest with himself, he hadn't even considered the welfare of the babies up until this point, his main focal point had been Anna. He allowed his mind to wander to a dark place for the briefest of moments. What if at the end of all this, he had to make a choice? What if he had to make decisions no man should ever have to make? He shook the thought from his mind instantly. It wouldn't come down to that. It simply couldn't.

'Anna, you can't think like that. We must remain positive.' John's voice was much louder now, his voice persuasive as if he was trying to convince himself as well. 'Once all this is over, we'll be together, cradling our two newborns in our arms. Let no other scenario play in your mind but this one.'

* * *

John sat in the armchair, darkness filling the living room. It was two in the morning, John had insisted George go home and get some sleep. His cousin had refused, and now the gentle ticking of the clock was accompanied by a soft snoring coming from the other armchair. Occasionally, the sounds nearby would be joined by the odd muffled cry, coming from upstairs. They had become much more frequent since George had dropped off, John becoming more anxious as the sound sent shivers down his spine. Emily had been in contact a few times, assuring John Anna was fine and that proceedings were going to plan. Doctor Harris and May had arrived carrying two big bags each, telling John as they lead Anna upstairs that they were prepared for every eventuality.

Emily's last update had been an hour or so ago, informing John that the doctors believed the first baby would be born within the next couple of hours. Anna's cries were all of a sudden all John could hear. It was the uncertainty of it all he hated. He stood, looking up to the ceiling above him as one long groan escaped Anna. John squeezed his eyes shut as silence fell abruptly. The ticking of the clock was almost deafening as he prayed for some noise to emanate from above his head. He wasn't at all prepared for what he was to hear next.

A cry, but this time not Anna's. A noise he had never heard before, but was suddenly sure he would soon become very familiar with. A babies cry. He allowed a smile to play on his lips, then footsteps on the stairs made him turn his attention to the living room door. The click of it opening brought George out of his slumber as Emily appeared at the door.

'Baby number one has been born,' she announced breathily, a huge smile on her face. 'It's a girl.'

'A girl,' John breathed, raising a shaky hand to his mouth. 'We have a daughter.'

'That's fantastic,' George's voice was gruff with sleep, but still filled with enthusiasm as he placed a hand on John's shoulder.

'And Anna?' John asked, moving slightly closer to Emily. 'Is she...'

'She's tired, but holding up. I think the first baby being born is enough to spur her on. She's doing so well.'

'Tell her I love her, and how proud I am of her.'

'I will.' Their attentions were drawn to upstairs as with the living room door opened, Anna's cries were much more audible. 'I best be getting back up there. It won't be long now until you can see them.'

John nodded as Emily disappeared up the stairs, every inch of his body wanting to follow but knowing that he couldn't. George's arm reached across John then to close the door, then he lead John from the door to sit down once again.

'So, you're a father. How does that feel?' George lit the candle sitting on the mantelpiece, before studying the clock for the time.

'I can't even begin to process how it feels, until I know Anna is well.' John's eyes found the ceiling once more as another of Anna's groans filled the air.

'She is, you heard what young Emily said. She's doing so well.'

'But there is still one more baby...'

John was stopped dead as silence fell once more, like it had five or so minutes previously. His eyes met with George's as the wait for the next sound from upstairs seemed to take an eternity to arrive. Silence. And it was deafening as seconds must have turned into a minute. Then two.

'I have to get up there.' John moved as quickly as he could to the door, George manoeuvring himself to block the path before John's hand reached the door knob. Eyes met and a breathy sigh filled the air as George pushed John back into the living room. George placed a hand on John's shoulder as he noticed his cousin's eyes glistening, tears threatening to spill from them. 'This is killing me.'

As the words exited his mouth, finally a noise. John closed his eyes and released a breath as a babies cry, different from the one he heard before reached his ears.

'Thank God,' John bowed his head, realising for the first time there was something else in this world he could love as much as he loved Anna.

Thundering down the stairs as fast she could, Emily swung the door open. John looked over George's shoulder at the young girl, her face tear stained but full of joy.

'It's another girl, you have twin daughters, John.'

'I do?' John allowed himself a little chortle, in relief more than anything. 'And Anna?'

'Is demanding she be allowed to hold them,' Emily replied with a laugh of her own. 'The doctors are examining them and taking too long in her opinion. They are very small but both well and good. Anna's absolutely fine, she did amazingly.'

'But what about the second one, why did she take so long to cry?' George enquired.

'She needed oxygen, but she's alright.'

Agnes appeared behind Emily then, a pile of towels over her arm. 'You should be very proud of your wife, John. She's certainly the strongest woman I've ever come across.'

'I know that.' John nodded in agreement before resting his hand on Emily's. 'Thank you, to both of you. For being here.'

'It's the least we could do. The doctors will be down in a few moments so you can go and meet your daughters.'

Agnes placed a freshly brewed pot of tea on the table as Doctor Harris and Doctor May made their way into the living room. John was immediately on his feet, bounding towards the two men with an outstretched hand.

'I don't know how to thank you both,' John said, a broad smile across his face as each man shook his hand in turn.

'All is well at the moment, but I insist on staying nearby.' Doctor Harris replied.

'You can stay at my public house.' George offered. 'Over the road.'

'Thank you. That way I am near just in case and I can examine the three of them tomorrow. Only when I am sure everything is alright will I leave for Aberdeen.'

'I appreciate that, Doctor Harris. Really, I do.' John looked beyond the two doctors to the open living room door. 'Can I go up now?'

'Certainly, Mr Bates.' Doctor May replied with a grin. 'Congratulations, you have two beautiful, healthy baby girls. And a wife you should be proud of for all of your days.'

'Believe me, she is far more than I deserve.' John turned to the three exhausted people sitting at the table behind him. 'I don't meant to be a terrible host, but do you mind if I...' John looked to the ceiling, to indicate where his intentions lay.

'Of course not,' Agnes replied in her strong Scottish brogue. 'Go to them. We'll just have a cup of tea then be on our way.'

With a nod of his head, John left the living room and made his way towards the stairs. His body was filled with anticipation, a feeling he had only begun to experience since he had met Anna. As he reached the landing, he composed himself before treading the floorboards towards the room he shared with Anna. John stood open mouthed at the sight before him as he opened the door. Anna's knees were bent so she could support both the babies at the same time, her arms placed securely around the top of them, one hand on each of their heads. She was talking to them, so softly that John could barely hear what she was saying. She was pale, her hair tied back unkemptly yet the smile she was wearing was more beautiful than John had ever seen. She looked the picture of joy, and it made John's heart swell with love that he could have played a part in what was making Anna so happy. Then she looked up, and John's gasp was audible, his heart beating so fast he was sure Anna must have been able to hear it.

'My little darlings, it looks like Daddy has finally managed to join us.'

'Can I come in?'

'You silly beggar, of course you can. We've been wondering when you would appear.'

As he walked closer to the bed, his gaze was fixed on the two bundles laying contentedly on Anna's knee. As she was towards the middle of the bed, John was able to perch down beside her, his back against the headboard. Anna watched him intently as took in the two babies resting on her lap. She had to catch her breath as his smile grew before he gently stroked the brow of the baby nearest to him, the size of his finger against her face reminding Anna how small they both were. They both had dark, wispy hair covering their heads, little button noses, John couldn't believe that something so small and perfect could exist. One of them was asleep, every so often twitching her little hand as Anna's finger ran over her arm. The other was awake, her sparkling blue eyes focussed on John. Meeting her gaze, John couldn't put into the words the emotions running through him as she stared back at him.

'Aren't you going to say something?' Anna broke the silence that fallen.

'Sorry, I'm just a little overwhelmed,' John replied before kissing Anna's forehead. 'Our daughters. I can't explain how I'm feeling at this moment. Only that I am so incredibly in love with you. I didn't think it was possible to love you more, but then you make this happen and...' He stopped for a moment as his voice stuttered a little, meeting his little daughters evoking emotions he had never dreamt of feeling. 'You gave up everything for me, then you give me the greatest gift of two healthy children. I don't deserve any of this. I owe you so much.'

'Ssssh,' Anna hushed him, resting her head on his shoulder as John placed his arm around her. 'Ever since the day I met you this is all I have ever wanted. To live my life with you at my side. I didn't give up anything to be with you, leaving Downton to move up here was the easiest decision I ever made.' She looked away from him to the babies she was cradling. 'Look what I would have missed out on if I hadn't come with you.'

'I thank the Lord every day you convinced me in that courtyard that this was right.'

'How can anything that feels this right be wrong?' Anna said in response, snuggling in closer to her husband. 'This was meant to be. And that's all there is to it.'

* * *

**A/N 2- Ideas for names greatly received. I'm not sure if twins would have required Anna to give birth in a hospital, but all I could find on the subject was that hospital births were not commonplace until the 1940's. **


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N It's taken me two weeks to write this chapter. I hope it was worth the wait. Thanks for everyone who has taken the time to review, I really appreciate it.**

**This chapter includes some lovely Bates family fluff. With a few old friends aswell. **

**Disclaimer- **Nothing belongs to me, Downton belongs to Julian Fellowes/ITV/ Carnival.

* * *

'Now come along, Ella Louise.' John whispered gently, holding the small grizzling baby in his arms tightly to his chest before kissing the top of her head as he walked down the stairs. 'You're just like your Daddy, ever the insomniac. Let's leave Mummy and your sister in peace shall we? '

Reaching the kitchen, John looked out of the window and noticed the sun bathing the garden. He decided in that moment he would take the younger of his twin daughters out for an early morning stroll. Reaching for a blanket that had been left on the back of one of the kitchen table chairs, John carefully set about wrapping little Ella. Although she was now a month old, John was still a little nervous when handling her, and her sister Lily May. Anna, however, had taken to motherhood like she did most tasks she undertook- with ease. John would never be able to put into words how it felt to see Anna when she held the twins in her arms. His girls.

Anxiety plagued John at first. He found himself checking on the girls every few minutes if they were sleeping, Anna would softly tease him as he hovered over them, to ensure they were both still breathing. In the week immediately after they were born, John only registered one or two hours of sleep a night as his apprehension overtook him. Although he would have never have admitted it to Anna, he just couldn't believe his luck. Things had never been better in his whole life, it would just be his luck if something went wrong. It was all too good to be true.

Lily was laid back, hardly ever making a fuss unless she was hungry or tired. She definitely took after her mother, at ease with the world. The older of the sisters was perfectly content to sit with Anna as she read. This was usually whilst John was dealing with Ella, who was Lily's polar opposite in terms of temperament and much more like her father. From the beginning, Ella had proved herself to be very much a Daddy's girl. She did respond well to Anna during the day, she had no choice when he had to return to the pub after a short period of leave. However at night, whereas Lily settled with little trouble at all and would sleep for a number of hours, Ella wouldn't finally give in to sleep until she was in John's arms. Consultation with Doctor Harris returned the diagnosis that there was nothing medically wrong with Ella, she was just inquisitive and probably took after John in terms of insomnia.

Now safely wrapped up in her blanket, John took Ella back into his embrace and continued on out into the back garden. He himself was only in his undershirt and pyjama bottoms, but was confident that at half past five on this summer morning he wouldn't be noticed. Reaching the flowers that Anna had planted alongside the left side of the garden path, John stopped to admire her handiwork.

'See those Bearded Irises Mummy planted have come up beautifully,' John began, before looking to his right at the small vegetable patch he had tried to sow in the winter months. 'If only the same could be said for Daddy's carrots and potatoes. I should stick to what I'm good at. Polishing shoes and brushing riding jackets.'

Hearing a shuffling behind him, followed by a sound John had grown to adore, he looked back over his shoulder to see Anna laughing as she was standing just inside the back door.

'Morning,' she said through her giggling. 'Your potatoes weren't that bad.'

'What are you doing up?' John began to tread the garden path back towards Anna, Ella complaining slightly when his foot met a wobbly part of the path made a clunking noise. 'It's barely six.'

'I know that,' Anna replied, pulling the blanket away from Ella's face to have a look at her. 'I just wanted to make sure the two of you were alright.'

'We're fine,' John said with a smile, gently rocking Ella in his arms. 'Go back to bed. Please. Lily might wake and...'

'Lily is sound asleep after you settled her earlier.' Anna interrupted with an insistent tone, before raising her eyebrows. 'Again. I do wish you would wake me, it's not fair you deal with them every time they wake up. You need sleep too.'

John stared back at Anna with a grin on his face, gently rocking on his feet to keep the motion that was rendering Ella peaceful going. 'Anna, sleep doesn't come easily to me as it is. You should know this about me by now. And besides, my time is wrapped up with this little one, it was nice to have a cuddle with my other beautiful girl whilst Ella was quiet.'

Anna leant up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to John cheek before whispering in his ear. 'And what about a cuddle in bed with their mummy? Do you think that might be on the cards in the near future?'

'As soon as Ella is settled, you try and keep me away.'

* * *

As the summer months turned into Autumn, John and Anna set about arranging the christening for their twin daughters. George had been chosen to be Godfather to the both of them, and Anna had chosen Daisy to be their Godmother. John sent a letter to Lord Grantham, making him aware of the ceremony and that he would be honoured if he would be present. John was moved when he received correspondence from his former employer, saying he and his wife would love to attend.

John sat on the bed, both the twins lying on their backs looking up at him as he fussed over them after completing yet another lunchtime shift at the pub. Both started waking from their midday sleep almost as soon as he walked through the door. John insisted he would see to them so Anna could put her feet up for an hour or so. Time alone had become sparse since the twins arrived, just as John sat down with Anna in his arms, one of the girls began to cry, the other following suit soon after.

The christening was a few days away, John looked over to the wardrobe to see the two Christening gowns Anna had picked out hanging from the door. His mind drifted to the goings on of the day. His Lordship and Ladyship would be staying with relatives before travelling down to Peterhead on the day of the Christening. It meant so much to John to have Lord Grantham present. He was the closest thing John had to a friend. They had been through so much together.

'Well then, my little darlings,' John cooed as each of his daughters looked up at him, big grins on their faces. Each held one of his index fingers in their little hands, barely able to wrap a whole fist around them. 'I do hope you were good girls for Mummy whilst I was at work.'

'They were little angels,' Anna said as appeared at the door, holding a letter in her hand. 'Even Ella went down easily which doesn't happen often as you well know.'

'Indeed,' John replied with a smirk before looking down at his youngest daughter. 'She's getting better.'

'She is,' Anna agreed, sitting on the edge of the bed beside John. She rested her head on his shoulder. 'You never know, she might even sleep long enough for us to share a few moments alone.'

'She might.' John kissed Anna's temple. 'Stranger things have happened.'

'It's been three months,' Anna whined, John catching on to her meaning almost instantly, letting out a small chuckle.

'Really? That long?'

'I know I wasn't up to it for the few weeks after I gave birth, but now.' She stopped talking and exhaled deeply. 'I'm told it's normal.'

John almost choked at Anna's words. 'Are you telling me you have discussed our private lives with others? I'm shocked.'

'Not everything, but Agnes is a good listener and I trust her. It's nice to have someone to talk to.'

'Right,' John said, raising a sceptical eyebrow. 'And her advice was?'

'Well, she offered to have the twins for us any time we wanted so we could...'

'Anna!' John exclaimed, gently nudging her as she descended into laughter. It was then that the paper in Anna's hand took his attention. 'Who is that from?'

'Mrs Hughes. She says she hopes we don't mind but she will be accompanying Daisy up here for the Christening.'

'I don't mind but what about Mr Carson?'

'She says he'll just have to manage,' Anna replied as she read over the letter once again. 'I'm thirsty, fancy a cup of tea?'

'I'd love one,' John answered with a smile, turning his attentions back to the twins. 'We'll be down in a minute.'

'John, I do wish you'd stop carrying them both around at the same time.' Anna remarked as she rose to her feet.

'What? I haven't dropped them yet, have I?'

'It's not that. I know you wouldn't drop them. It's just with your knee and all...'

'My knee is fine,' John sighed. 'Don't worry about me. They are so light I hardly feel it when I am carrying them. And besides, taking them one by one means one would be left up here alone.' John looked back at his daughters. 'And we can't have that, can we?'

Anna stopped by the door and took in the sight before her. Her heart swelled with love for the three people on the bed. In the beginning, John had been so awkward around the girls but now he was proving to be the father Anna always believed he would be. Loving, affectionate and protective. All in that moment, Anna was perfectly content with the choice of father for her little girls.

'Anna,' John said suddenly as she turned to walk away. She looked back over her shoulder, a smile on her lips that took John's breath away. 'What we were speaking about, earlier. You know, what you confide in Agnes about.'

'Yes,' Anna was finding John's shyness around the situation wholly endearing as she turned and stepped back just inside the bedroom.

'Just because the timing has never been right, or something has got in the way, well...' John stopped for a moment, closing his eyes, trying to formulate what he was trying to say into something cohesive. 'To be utterly candid, I never stop desiring you. Or wanting you. I want you to know that.'

'I know,' Anna responded with a nod of the head. 'I do love you, John Bates.'

'I love you too.'

* * *

'Aww Anna, they are both so beautiful,' Mrs Hughes cooed as she looked over both the twins, herself holding Ella and Daisy holding Lily. 'You both must be so pleased.'

'We are, we feel so blessed,' Anna agreed with a nod, hand placed on Daisy's shoulder. 'After everything.'

'I just wish this could have all happened at Downton,' Daisy added, sitting down in the armchair, smiling down at Lily. 'It's not fair. You and Mr Bates belong together, everyone can see that.'

'Thank you, Daisy,' Anna knelt down beside her as Mrs Hughes sat on the couch. 'One day we might be able to come back. You never know. So, I take it His Lordship and Her Ladyship left a couple of days ago?'

'Oh yes,' Mrs Hughes nodded. 'They are staying at Duneagle with His Lordship's cousin then travelling down tomorrow morning.'

'It's kind of Mr Bates's cousin to allow us to stay for free.'

'Did I hear my name?'

John appeared at the door, a bottle of wine in hand as he stepped into the living room. Ella immediately began causing a commotion in Mrs Hughes arms at the sound of her father's voice.

'Someone is excited that her Daddy is home,' Mrs Hughes remarked as she stood, John stepping towards her and placing a kiss on the housekeepers cheek. 'So nice to see you, Elsie. And Daisy. How are you?'

'Fine, thank you Mr Bates.'

'Please Daisy, we aren't at Downton now,' John began as he walked to her and placed a hand on her shoulder. 'Call me John.'

'Oh, I couldn't do that,' Daisy shook her head, looking beyond John at Anna and smiling awkwardly as she spoke.

'Who is the wine for?' Anna asked, pointing in the direction of the bottle under John's arms.

'Us. To accompany lunch.' John walked back towards Ella who was now crying, obviously finding it incredulous her father hadn't picked her up yet. Mrs Hughes seemed relieved to offer John his little daughter, John easily scooping her up in his arms. She settled immediately, Mrs Hughes offering Anna an impressed glance. 'Anyone for tea?'

'I'll help,' Anna announced as John left the room. Reaching the door, she looked back over her shoulder as Elsie moved to the armchair in which Lily and Daisy were sitting. 'Are you alright with Lily?'

'We'll be fine,' Mrs Hughes replied without a glance at Anna as she gently stroked Lily's cheek.

Satisfied everything was under control in the living room, Anna walked through to the kitchen where John was busy preparing a tea tray one handed. She leant against the doorframe, tongue in cheek with a smirk on her face as John struggled through cupboards balancing his young daughter precariously with one arm.

'Excuse me,' Anna began, clearing her throat. 'You're not going to get away with that, you know.'

John turned to look at Anna, narrowly missing hitting his head on the cupboard door he had just opened. 'Get away with what?'

'Greeting everyone else and not giving your wife a second glance.'

Anna moved towards John, her arms folded. Stopping in front of him, she leant up on her tiptoes and planted a gentle kiss on John's cheek. She then preceded to take Ella from John's arms, with little complaint from the baby.

'You know it wasn't intentional, my darling,' John smiled, turning back to the task in hand. 'It is nice to see the two of them, though.'

'It is. And guess what?'

'What's that, my angel?'

'Agnes has offered to watch the twins tonight.' Anna replied. 'Meaning we can maybe come over to the pub and have a meal together. I'm sure George won't mind you taking an hour or so to eat with us.'

'We are of one mind,' John said as he stepped towards Anna, gently tapping her on the end of the nose with the back of a teaspoon. 'George's last words to me as I left were that I could have the evening off, and he would love to see the four of us for our supper. If we could make it.'

'Seems it's settled then.'

John closed the kitchen door fully before walking back to Anna. He spoke barely in a whisper. 'Does Daisy know everything? About our situation?'

'Yes, she does.' As Anna replied John winced a little, she suddenly feeling the need to reassure him. She placed a hand on his forearm, squeezing there gently. 'And she's fine with it. She told me herself it's not fair because we belong together.'

A wonderful smile spread across John's lips at Anna's words as he reached for the hand that wasn't cradling Ella. He brought it to his lips, and placed a kiss on the back of Anna's hand.

'We certainly do,' John winked, Anna was sure her heat skipped a beat. 'I best get on with this tea, they'll think we've got lost.'

* * *

Once shown to their rooms, Daisy and Mrs Hughes joined Anna and John for something to eat. Anna found it hard to leave the girls, this was the first time in their short lives she had done so with someone other than John. They were in good hands with Agnes, and Emily was there to help her mother. John ushered her away from the house, reassuring her all the way to the pub that their daughters would be perfectly fine.

An evening was shared talking about the old times, working together at Downton. News was shared about William, and Captain Crawley. They arrived at Downton during a concert for the troops at the war hospital the Abbey had now become. Now they were back in action, and hadn't been heard from for a while. Both women were certain they were well, however. Daisy spoke with such pride when talking about William. It warmed Anna's heart that the man she had come to regard almost like a brother had someone so fond of him waiting at home.

Daisy had long since retired to bed, John, Anna and Mrs Hughes remaining at their table as George rang the bell behind the bar for last call. The conversation had moved on to the subject of Vera, and her whereabouts. No one had heard from her since her meeting with His Lordship.

'And what about Miss O Brien?' John asked. 'Has she been in contact?'

Mrs Hughes sighed before meeting John's eye. 'I couldn't tell you. All I know is Miss O Brien has no way of knowing where you are. All our correspondence is kept in a locked drawer in my sitting room. Only I have the key.'

'That's one thing I suppose,' Anna said in response before looking up at John. 'Seems we got away just in time.'

'It must be a hardship though,' Mrs Hughes remarked before taking a sip of her drink. 'Having to live life like this.'

'You might think so but...'

'It was much harder being apart,' John said, interrupting Anna. 'I can say wholeheartedly I wouldn't change one thing about our life together. My life only began when we moved up here, when myself and Anna were able to live like this.'

Anna met his gaze then, her eyes glistening with a tear at John's words. 'I couldn't have put it better myself.'

* * *

After a photo outside the church, John was finally able to speak to his old employer. Lord and Lady Grantham had arrived with only a few minutes to spare, the chauffeur finding it difficult to locate the church in such a remote area. The ceremony passed without a hitch, Daisy and George taking their roles as Godparents very seriously, and with great pride. A few of the locals were present, most confused as to why the well to do couple at the back were there and who they were, but no one questioned it.

John approached Lord Grantham, a wriggling yet content Ella in his arms. a smile from ear to ear as he met his former comrades gaze.

'My Lord, so glad you could make it.'

'Nonsense Bates, it's my pleasure.' Lord Grantham replied, doffing his hat before moving to look at the baby in John's arms. 'And who is this?'

'This, is Ella.' John raised her a little in his arms so she was more easily seen.

'She's beautiful,' Lord Grantham stroked her cheek gently with his index finger. 'She's the image of her mother.'

'Thank God,' John replied with a laugh, His Lordship following suit. 'I never thought the day I'd become a father would arrive. Yet, here I am on my twin daughters christening day.'

'Becoming a father is the best thing I ever did and this is a wonderful age.' Lord Grantham mused, smiling down at Ella. 'Before you know it they are arguing back and telling you how life is. Savour these moments, John.'

Looking up, John was taken aback at Lord Grantham using his given name. He took a moment to compose himself. 'I most certainly will. Thank you. '

'Myself and Lady Cora want you to have this,' Lord Grantham held out an envelope in John's direction. 'I know from experience you are a stubborn fellow but please accept it. I owe you so much more.'

'You boys look deep in conversation.' Both men looked to their right to see Lady Cora, Mrs Hughes, Daisy and Anna, Lily in her arms approaching them. 'Robert, Anna has invited us back to the local inn for something to eat.'

'It's just a light buffet, nothing to grand but...'

'We'd love to,' Lord Grantham replied with a smile, cutting Anna off mid sentence. He placed a solid hand on John's shoulder. 'Myself and my old comrade have some catching up to do.'

* * *

Night time fell, everyone safely on a train travelling back down south to Yorkshire. John and Anna lay beside each other, Ella and Lily softly cooing, perfectly content in their cribs at the bottom of the bed. John's arm was firmly around Anna's shoulder, she resting her head on his chest. John loved evenings like this, when the twins were settled and he could hold Anna in his arms.

'Can I ask you something, John?'

'Anything,' he whispered back. 'But nothing too taxing, it's been a long day.'

'Do you feel a bit of a fraud? Our daughters christened and we aren't even married.'

The next sound she heard was that of a deep sigh from the man lying beside her. 'I thought I said nothing too taxing.'

Anna laughed softly before cuddling into John a little more. 'Sorry.'

'As far as everyone knows we are married, Anna. I don't need a piece of paper to tell me what I know in my heart.'

'And what does your heart tell you, Mr Bates?'

'Only that my life without you doesn't even bear thinking about. I was made for you, Anna. I truly believe we were meant to be together, no matter what. We were meant to bring Ella and Lily into the world. Their parents might not be married but they are truly in love and committed to the other, how many children can say that about their mother and father?'

'You are so perfect, did I ever tell you that?'

John kissed Anna on the top of her head before pulling her closer to him. 'I'll never understand what you see in me. Why you love me the way you do.'

'Then don't try to. Just accept that I do, with all my heart and nothing is ever going to change that.'


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N This chapter comes with a smut warning, nothing too graphic but thought I'd warn you all just the same. Things take a turn as we near the end of this story. Thanks for all of your reviews, they mean a lot :)**

**Disclaimer:** All things Downton belong to Julian Fellowes/Carnival/ ITV.

* * *

John lay in bed, propped up against the headboard with a smirk on his face. Having just laid Ella down to sleep in record time, he was now warm and snug in bed, whilst Anna paced the other end of the room. Lily, albeit content, was still looking up at her mother, cooing in Anna's arms. Looking over her shoulder, Anna glared at John as he fidgeted, fighting to warm himself up as the cold winter air filled the room around him. The twins, now nine months old, were sleeping through the night, when they both eventually fell asleep. It seemed it would always take longer for one to fall asleep than the other. Usually, it would be Lily who gave into slumber quicker than her sister. Yet, tonight it was Ella, and in turn John was the victor.

'I don't know why you're looking so happy with yourself, Mr Bates.' Anna whispered, still rocking Lily in her arms. 'There's no point in getting yourself warm. As soon as I am over there I'll be clinging my cold body to yours for the warmth.'

'Is that a promise?' John said with a raised eyebrow and a smile that made Anna's breath catch in her throat. Turning her attentions back to her daughter, it was all Anna could do to not jump and down as Lily's eyes began to flutter shut. Despite not working, she still found it tiring looking after two nine month old babies the day long.

Anna gently placed Lily in the crib before stroking her cheek, then Ella's. Both now sleeping soundly, Anna turned her attentions to the still grinning man whose undivided attention she held. With a nod of the head, John pulled back the covers. Gently tiptoeing across the room, Anna got into the bed. It took barely a second for John's arms to find her waist, pulling Anna closer into his embrace. No words were spoken as John covered Anna's mouth with his own, past experience with the twins now telling them not to waist a moment whilst they were quiet. John's hand found it's way to the hem of Anna's nightdress, bunching it in his fist as they still shared they kissed languidly, savouring every moment.

Just as John's hand found the skin of Anna's thigh, a whimper could be heard from one of the cots in the corner of the room. Anna pulled away immediately, John burying his head on the pillow in frustration.

'It's Ella,' Anna whispered before silence fell again. As the silence stretched longer, John took this as his cue to continue with his ministrations, placing his lips on Anna's neck. Sinking back into the feeling of his hands on her, Anna began to unbutton John's pyjama top. She had just reached the last shackle keeping his bare chest from her when the whimpering began again, soon turning into a full blown cry.

'Oh, for heavens sake,' John hissed, highly irritated he had been interrupted. Anna wriggled from his grasp, wanting to settle Ella before she woke her sister. 'They should have moved into their nursery by now.'

'And as I've told you before, John,' Anna argued back in a hushed tone. 'I am not ready yet.'

'Anna, they aren't going to be babies forever. At this rate they'll be reading us bedtime stories.' She huffed out loud at his remark, treading the floor towards the door with Ella now in her arms. 'Are we ever going to get some proper time alone?'

'Is that all you can think about?' Anna hissed as she opened the bedroom door. 'Your needs, what you want, my duty to you?'

'Where are you going?' John asked as Anna stepped into the hall.

'To settle our daughter away from you.'

John lay back, rubbing a hand over his face as Anna left the room with Ella. He didn't mean to snap at her, God knows it was the one thing he promised wouldn't happen when Anna moved to Scotland with him. But they both had differing views on where the girls should be sleeping. In John's eyes, they should have been in their own room from the start. Anna wanted them close to her, and because John still felt indebted to Anna for everything, he agreed. Now, nine months on and the girls still occupied cribs in the corner of their parents bedroom.

Their times together since the twins had been born were few and far between. John had always felt rushed and uncomfortable knowing his daughters, although sleeping, were present. Anna would always have one eye on them both and it bothered John that she was always distracted. It wasn't right. John knew it. Anna deserved better than some desperate fumble, yet as long as the girls were in the same room he couldn't see how else it could be. Although Agnes would look after the twins on occasion, to give Anna a break, it didn't feel right despite her joking about it in the past to allow someone else to look after her daughters whilst she went to bed with John.

Something had to give, however. John felt terrible for how he had just spoken to Anna. As he lay in bed, listening to the soft sounds of Lily sleeping contentedly, John hatched a plan in his mind. Anna needed a night off, a night to enjoy herself without the stresses of making sure twin baby girls were looked after. She needed to be reassured that for as long as he lived, he wouldn't rest until her happiness was guaranteed.

It was the least he could do.

* * *

John stepped into the living room, the two girls babbling happily in their highchairs as Anna went about cleaning. He had been treading on egg shells all morning, Anna never returned to bed the previous evening. John came downstairs early that morning to discover Anna asleep on the sofa, Ella sleeping peacefully on her mother's chest. Now it was time for John to start the lunchtime shift, and Anna had not uttered more than two words in his direction.

'So, how are my girls?' John asked tentatively sitting on the sofa to tie up his boot laces.

'Girls, I believe your father asked you a question.'

'Come on, Anna. You know I meant you as well. How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?'

'For what? Putting your urges before your daughters?'

'Anna, it's not like that at all.' John stood up, his laces now tied and moved towards Anna who had just finished dusting the mantelpiece. 'You've even moaned about it yourself. The girls interrupting us.'

'But I'd never put us before them. Which is what you were...'

'What I am saying is maybe it's time for them to move into their own room. It's a perfectly natural progression...'

'Which I am not ready to progress to yet.' Anna folded her arms, her expression cold as she stared back at John. He let out a sigh, before turning his attentions to his two little girls sitting in their highchairs.

'Well my angels, Daddy will be back later. Help Mummy out by being good girls, won't you?'

John walked back to Anna, leaning to kiss on her on the lips before she turned her head. He would have to make do with her cheek.

'I love you,' he whispered, stepping away.

'Have a good shift,' was all Anna offered in return.

Shrugging his shoulders, John turned on his heel and walked into the hallway. Putting on his coat, then his hat, he took hold of his cane and made his way outside. Once at the bottom of his path, he saw Agnes leaving the post office. Thoughts of his plan entered his mind as he watched her stride back towards her tea rooms. Looking at his watch, John was certain George wouldn't mind if he was a little late for his shift.

Reaching the door to the tea rooms, John looked inside to see Agnes behind the counter, trying up her apron before walking into the back room. Opening the door, John moved towards the counter, Emily noticing him and offering him a warm smile.

'Hello John, usual is it?'

'No, thank you. I was wondering if I might have a word with your mother.'

'Of course,' Emily furrowed her brow in curiosity before calling through for her mother. 'Ma, Mr Bates would like a word.'

'Certainly,' came the booming response, Agnes appearing in the doorway. 'What can I do you for, John?'

'I wanted a word. In private if that was agreeable?'

Agnes nodded before gesturing towards a table in the corner of the room. John followed Agnes, allowing her to sit before doing the same.

'I was hoping you might be able to do me a favour?' John began, his voice barely a whisper.

'Only if you speak up lad, I'm not blessed with the hearing of a cocker spaniel.'

'Sorry, it's just my request is of a sensitive nature.'

'I'm intrigued,' Agnes replied, leaning forward. 'It's not about that beautiful wife of yours, is it?'

'Well, yes. It is. As you know we have our hands full with the girls, and it's very difficult to, well. You know. Myself and Anna haven't. I mean...'

John's voice began to falter, Agnes's face had now erupted into a huge grin as she acknowledged what John was failing to say in clear cut terms. He was flashing a deep shade of crimson and his voice becoming more shaky with each word he spoke. 'Well, you know when a man and a woman, who are married I might add, love each other and they want to show that love...'

'Stop.' Agnes rose a hand to halt John's babbling. 'Stop right their young John. I am a woman of the world, I know what you are getting at.'

'You do?' John said in relief more than anything else.

'Yes. You want me to watch the girls so you and Anna can spend some time alone together?'

'Well yes. But my request would be for you to have them overnight.'

'Overnight?'

'Yes. So I could cook a meal for Anna and we could spend a proper evening together. I know it was our choice to have the girls but I can't remember the last time we have been free to have a cuddle on the sofa or read together.'

'When?'

'Tonight.'

'Tonight?' Agnes exclaimed.

'Is it too short notice?'

'No, but where do you expect them to sleep?' Agnes asked, folding her arms.

John hadn't thought of that, inwardly cursing himself at forgetting the most obvious of details. The clearest answer was to move the cribs to Agnes. But how without Anna noticing? He may need the help of his cousin to ensure his plan came to fruition.

'Can you be available in time for lunchtime closing at the pub?'

'I suppose so,' Agnes replied. 'About two?'

'Perfect. I'll see you then.'

John stood and left the tea rooms at a canter, Agnes looking on, shaking her head and laughing softly to herself.

* * *

'So let me get this straight. You are going to take Anna out, then want me to move the girls cribs to Agnes's house?'

'Yes. I'll take Anna for a walk with the girls, then return your beloved Goddaughters to their Aunty Agnes's then take Anna back to our cottage to make her dinner. It's the least she deserves.'

John and George were conversing with Agnes outside the tea rooms, explaining his plan and the best way to execute it.

'And I'll have them all night?' Agnes asked, John nodding his head in response. 'Are you sure Anna will be party to that? It's a lot to ask of a first time mother. Your baby staying overnight with someone else.'

'I have to try. And I'm sure Anna will be fine with it. She trusts you more than anyone else we know. Except for you George, of course.'

'Oh alright. But I can't keep giving you time off just like that John. My other staff might see it as favouritism.'

'Just shove the wages I would have been getting into Harold's. He'll be fine with that. I just have to do this for Anna. We had words last night and I feel terrible. I need to make it up to her.'

'What's this?' They all turned to see Anna strolling towards them, double pushchair under her control.

'Hello my love,' John said, kissing Anna on the cheek. 'Just chatting with the neighbours. What brings you out and about?'

'I'm going stir crazy in that cottage, so the girls thought their Daddy might enjoy a walk around the village.' Her features softened as she looked up at John. 'And his wife thought the same.'

'That he would.' John couldn't stop himself from smiling back at her, their eyes meeting each others and their gaze holding for a few seconds. Breaking their silent link, John looked at George and Agnes in turn. George nodded at his cousin, letting him know everything was in hand.

'Lets get moving shall we?' Anna suggested, pulling the collar of her coat upwards. 'We'll catch our deaths otherwise. It's alright when you are wrapped up snugly in a pushchair.'

* * *

Anna and John began to walk up the main street in the village, it playing strongly in John's mind that now was the time to put his plan into action. Agnes house was a few yards away. As they reached it, John placed his hand on the pushchair.

'Something the matter?' Anna asked, looking up at John with a troubled look on his face.

In the next moment, the front door of her house swung open and Agnes came bounding up the garden path. She took the pushchair from Anna's grasp.

'I found the bag you left me, John. And their cribs were easily moved. Now you two have a nice evening and don't worry about a thing. Me and Emily have everything under control.'

'Right, very well then Agnes.'

'John Bates,' Anna said sternly as she watched Agnes walk the girls inside. 'What is going on?'

John shuffled on his feet, avoiding Anna's gaze until he had no choice but to meet her eyes.

'Well, I felt so bad about last night. About everything really. It's just, I adore you and I wanted some time, uninterrupted to show you how much. And it's not about us sharing a bed, or anything like that. It's about us spending some time alone together. Free of the stresses that come with looking after our daughters. Just for one night.' John stepped closer to Anna before continuing. 'I'd miss them too much if it was any longer.'

Relief swept through his body as Anna smiled.

'We best not waste a second then.'

* * *

Once dinner had been consumed, Anna's favourite of shepherds pie which Agnes has thoughtfully prepared, John and Anna moved through to the living room. Leaning his back against the arm of the sofa, John held Anna tightly in his arms, she resting her head against his chest. They sat in contented silence, simply happy to be in each other's company as the rain fell down outside.

'Thank you,' Anna murmured, breaking the silence and leaning up to look into John's eyes. 'I needed this.'

'Me too,' he agreed. 'And I really am sorry. I was completely selfish last night...'

Anna placed a finger on his lips to silence him. 'It's forgotten about. But keeping on the subject of last night, do you think we might be able to continue where we were so disappointingly interrupted?'

Sucking in a breath as the dulcet tones of her voice filled his ears, John felt a rush of anticipation flow through his body. 'Only if you are sure.'

Anna leant up so she could whisper in his ear. 'Take me upstairs.'

John obliged, leading the way with a confident stride. Once in their room, it didn't take long for garments to be discarded and for them to become reacquainted properly. John had no regard for his own pleasure as his fingers worked their way around Anna's body, instantly remembering how she liked to be touched, what brought her pleasure. Anna cursed the effects pregnancy and childbirth had on her body, even though she was only carrying marginally more weight than she had been before. John reassured her with his touch and softly spoken words, leaving her in no uncertain terms that to him she was perfect. Proceedings between them so far had gone no further than wandering hands and a few kisses but it was heaven to be able to touch each other unbidden, without the fear of interruption.

Both laying so they were facing each other, a thought played over in John's mind. Something he hadn't experienced since he was a young man. Something he hoped Anna would enjoy.

'Do you trust me?' he said suddenly.

'With my life.'

'Would you be willing to try something a little different?'

'Alright...'

He stood, moving to kneel beside the bed. She watched as he gestured for her to move towards him.

'Lay back,' he explained, 'but have you legs over the edge, so your feet touch the floor.'

Without a word she did as she was instructed, her feet touching the coldness of the floorboards sending a shiver through her entire body. John lent forward to capture her lips in a kiss before she gently fell backwards.

Moving forward, John positioned himself so he could whisper in her ear.

'If I do anything you feel uncomfortable with, please tell me to stop.'

'Why? What are you going to do?' Anna asked more in curiosity than trepidation. She meant it when she said she trusted this man with her life, he would never hurt her. She wouldn't have had children with him if she felt differently.

'I love every inch of you.' John continued, whispering in her ear. 'I want to kiss every inch of you. Every single inch...'

He placed emphasis on the last three words before placing his lips on her neck. Anna closed her eyes as she allowed John to smother her body in kisses, each individual kiss a caress upon her skin, each one unique. Lost in the moment, she suddenly became aware John's lips were moving lower down her body. He couldn't possibly be, could he?

Then he confirmed her suspicions. Anna stopped breathing for a moment before a moan escaped her. John moved his lips back to her stomach, giving her time to adjust to what his actions, time for her to tell him to stop if she wanted him to.

The first stroke of his tongue against her had come as a shock, almost like it hadn't happened. Her initial reaction was one of disbelief that John would want to kiss her there, of all places. She remembered maids telling stories in her time at Downton. How it was something disgusting, something to be frowned upon. In all their encounters, she and John had never engaged in this kind of activity. Anna admitted to herself his actions hadn't been totally unwelcome. It had felt strange, but left her feeling as if she were on fire, she wanted to feel more.

Which went for all the previous times they had made love. John always left her wanting more. He was the limit to her experience, but she was sure she could give her body to every single other man who existed in the universe, and they wouldn't come close to making her feel the way John did.

'Are you alright, my love?' John murmured looking up at her. 'I haven't gone too far?'

'You took me by surprise,' Anna breathed. 'We've never done this before.'

'Do you want me to stop?'

'God no,' Anna said, almost too eagerly, a smile playing upon john's face. 'More. Please.'

In the next instance, John's mouth began to explore the slickness of her folds, Anna moving her hips in rhythm to the motion of his tongue. She couldn't comprehend the feelings rushing through her, only able to understand that this was the most pleasure she had ever felt in her life. It didn't feel sordid or wrong, it was her and John and how could any representation of their love be wrong?

She felt her climax building, much faster, much more intense than she had become accustomed to. The noises emanating from her drove John on, he know had his hands resting on her bottom, lifting Anna's hips from the bed. She could hold on no longer as her body finally became undone, a long moan indicating to John she had reached her end.

As John made use of a handkerchief from the drawer of his bedside table, Anna kept her eyes shut, trying to catch her breath and get her head around what had just happened.

By the time she had opened her eyes, John was lying beside her, stroking her cheek gently, smiling warmly at her. Anna reciprocated his smile before closing her eyes again.

'I was just thinking that what you just did would be frowned upon in most social circles.' Anna raised her eyebrow, smiling deliciously.

'Well, it's lucky this social circle, which consists of me and you, quite enjoy it then.' John pressed a kiss to her neck. 'You're so beautiful, you deserve to be made love to in as many ways as possible.'

'Would you mind if I made a suggestion, Mr Bates?'

'Try me.'

'You lay back and allow me to take control for a moment. I can't allow you to do all the work, it's not fair. And you have been very kind to me.'

'If you insist, my love.'

* * *

Walking down the stairs, Mrs Hughes was surprised to see her sitting room door partially open. Furrowing her brow, she stepped closer to the room, the sound of papers being shuffled and a drawer being opened became audible. Pushing the door, Mrs Hughes couldn't believe what she was seeing. Miss O Brien, her back to the housekeeper with a handful of correspondences in her grasp surrounded by open drawers.

'Excuse me.' Mrs Hughes made her presence known, Miss O Brien turning sharply. 'What in God's name are you doing?'

Mrs Hughes turned her attentions to the letters in Miss O Brien's hand. They were her personal letters. She recognised some of them as coming from Anna. And then it all fell into place. Miss O Brien remained silent, a slight smirk playing upon her features.

'I'll give you one more chance to explain yourself,' Mrs Hughes hissed, stepping inside the room and shutting the door behind her. 'Why are you rifling through my personal letters?'

'It's not right, that's all,' Miss O Brien shrugged, placing the letters back in the drawer and shutting it as if she owned the contents.

'What isn't?' Mrs Hughes was growing impatient at the ladies maids disrespectful attitude. She had been caught red handed and yet she showed no hint of remorse.

'Mr Bates. And Anna. carrying on playing happy families. Poor Mrs Bates is devastated.'

Mrs Hughes's jaw hung open, she couldn't believe what she was hearing. 'Are you telling me that you are in contact with Mrs Bates?'

'Oh yes, and after reading what I did a week or so ago, she knows where they live now. Peterhead, in Scotland. '

'A week ago?' Mrs Hughes bellowed before stepping closer to Miss O Brien. 'So this isn't the first time you've had free reign of my sitting room?'

'No. You shouldn't leave it unlocked.'

'Get out,' Mrs Hughes shouted, Mr Carson appearing at the door a moment later. 'And pack your belongings. You are instantly dismissed.'

'But what about Her Ladyship, it's nearly...'

'I will see to Her Ladyship. I cannot have you working here any longer. It's one thing that you go through my personal belongings, it's another that you are trying to ruin the lives of two people I care about deeply. Just leave.'

'Mr Carson, you can't let this happen,' Miss O Brien turned to plead with the Butler. 'You need me here.'

Mr Carson inhaled deeply before stepping aside so he was no longer blocking the doorway. 'I believe you were asked to leave. I shall have whatever is owing to you ready and waiting once you are packed.'

Miss O Brien turned back to Mrs Hughes. 'I cannot believe you of all people condone their behaviour. It's not right, it's disgusting in fact that they live together in sin, that they have brought children into the world outside of wedlock...'

'Miss O Brien, I suggest you leave now if you wish to leave with a reference.' Mr Carson's voice was calm and collected, although his words angered Mrs Hughes somewhat. Miss O Brien left, snarling at the Butler as she did so.

'If it was up to me, she wouldn't be leaving with a reference at all.' Mrs Hughes sat behind her desk. 'Poor Anna. And those poor wee bairns. Their whole world is going to be torn apart by that vicious woman and her accomplice.'

'You must send them a telegram. Give them warning.' Mr Carson moved so he was standing opposite Mrs Hughes. 'I can arrange it for you.'

'I'd imagine it would be too late now.' Mrs Hughes said sadly.

'Even so, you should try. For their sakes.'

* * *

George stood in the hallway in the middle of the two cribs he had carried from Agnes's cottage. John came down the stairs to greet him and stopped on the bottom step, Anna walking towards George from the direction of kitchen.

'Are you going to help me put these upstairs then, Johnny?' George asked. 'It was difficult enough carrying them up from Agnes's. And Jack has arrived on these shores, he's due at the pub at one.'

'Yes, yes.' John replied. 'Don't worry about my war wound or anything.'

'Best put them in the nursery, eh?' Anna remarked, searching for John's eyes with her own. Their gaze easily met, John smiling the most beautiful smile in her direction. 'They'll be old enough to read us bedtime stories soon otherwise, eh?' Anna added her final remark with a wink.

'They will be,' John agreed before the sight of the postman walking the path through the open front door caught his gaze.

'Good day, Mr Bates, a telegram for Mrs Bates.'

John gestured to Anna standing just to his left from the stairs, the postman handing the envelope in her direction as John and George began to carry the first crib upstairs. As John reached the top, he heard Anna screech his name in a way he had never heard before.

'What on earth is the matter?' John called back, he and George dropping the crib on the landing before making their way downstairs.

'Vera is coming.'

'What?' John could scarcely believe what he was hearing as he took the telegram from Anna.

'Mrs Hughes has dismissed Miss O Brien because she caught her searching through her personal correspondence.' Anna began to explain. 'It seems she found what she was looking for, and Vera is on her way.'

'This can't be happening,' John raised a hand to his forehead before offering the telegram to John.

'What are we going to?' Anna's voice was breaking, a shaky hand covering her mouth. All John could do was place an arm around her shoulders.

'We will sort this,' George said defiantly. 'There is always a way.'

'But how...'

'Johnny, Jack will be here soon, he'll know what to do. Just go and get those baby daughters of yours. All four of you meet me at the pub in an hour or so.'

'But what if...'

'Vera is unlikely to turn up in the next hour,' George interrupted his cousin. 'Just get Ella and Lily and meet me over the road.'


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N- The penultimate chapter. This story has turned out to be a bit of a grind. I have made no secret modern fiction is my favourite to write, mainly because I think I'm better at it (although still not brilliant) but we've nearly reached the end of this one now. I have enjoyed writing it but am looking forward to continuing with Come Sing With Me, which I think is going to be a lot of fun. **

**Thanks for those who have taken time to review and follow this story :)**

**Disclaimer:** Same as chapters 1- 13

* * *

Anna and John waited at the back door of the pub, John clutching onto Lily, Anna rocking Ella in her arms. It didn't take long for George to appear at the door. John stepped aside to allow Anna to walk in first, before looking back over his shoulder into the village then following her. Once inside, Anna was glad of the fire. Placing Ella down on the rug, she watched as John placed Lily down. Catching her gaze, he smiled weakly at her, hoping this smallest of actions would go some way to reassuring her. He helped Anna out of her coat before taking off his own and his suit jacket. He hung them on the hook as George stood in silence by the mantelpiece.

'Hello hello.'

Both turned to see Jack arrive in the sitting room. Even though it was winter, he was still dressed in his white suit.

'Jack,' John walked towards his cousin with an outstretched hand. 'What brings you over here so suddenly?'

'I had a window, and I hadn't met the girls yet so I thought I'd take my opportunity.'

'We have a situation.' George moved to stand with his cousins.

'What sort of situation?'

John glanced over at Anna on the carpet with the girls. She looked up, nodding slightly to indicate she was allowing him to reveal all.

'Vera is on her way.' John began.

'Your ex wife?' Jack shrugged, placing his hands in pockets.

'That's just it.' John replied before taking a deep breath. 'She isn't my ex wife.'

'What?' Jack made use of one of the chairs at the dining room table, trying to process what was just said to him. He rubbed his forehead with his index finger, the silence was excruciating for John. He could always rely on the respect and support of his Scottish cousins, Jack's silence wasn't reassuring. Suddenly, Jack looked up. 'So you're a bigamist, John?'

'No. Me and Anna aren't married.'

'You aren't?'

John shook his head. 'We'd known each other the best part of three years when we decided we couldn't be apart any longer. I didn't know where Vera was, then Mother died and she turned up. I sensed my opportunity and asked Anna to marry me. Then, Vera knew I had money left to me by mother and blackmailed me to go back to London with her.'

'Blackmailed you how?'

'It's not important. Not now anyway. I was going to go with her, then Anna made me see I couldn't leave, that we belonged together. And here we are.'

'So your marriage is a lie?' Jack asked, looking over at Anna who looked away almost as soon as they made eye contact. He reached in his pocket, pulled out a tin and a small box of matches and lit up one of his expensive cigars.

'The marriage is, yes.' John said with a whisper. 'But how we feel about each other is very real. And now Vera will come here, reveal all and people we have come to value and have become our friends will turn their backs.'

'Well it's obvious isn't it?' Jack said after a puff on his cigar. 'You and the girls will come back to America with me.'

'What? Emigrate you mean?' Anna looked over at John in disbelief. 'We can't do that.'

'Unless you want your secret spread across this village and your lives most probably ruined, I don't see you have a choice.'

John was grateful that his cousin didn't judge them after his revelation, only suggesting ways to help them out of their predicament.

'I'd pay for your travelling, and the manager at my vineyard has just handed in his notice. I'd like someone I can trust to take over, and I trust you John. The position comes with accommodation, a house on the beach overlooking the Atlantic. The American's are a lot more open minded when it comes to this sort of thing. No one would bat an eyelid that you aren't married.'

John exhaled deeply before looking down at Anna, her face etched in concern. Then he glanced at his baby girls, playing happily together on the carpet in front of the fire, completely oblivious to anything going on around them. So innocent. They didn't deserve the whispers that would be uttered about them if his and Anna's private business was made public.

'George, would you watch the girls if myself and Anna had a word?'

'Of course,' George nodded.

'And I'll help, it will give me a chance to become acquainted with the little beauties.' Jack rested his cigar in the ashtray on the table before moving to sit with the girls on the carpet.

John led Anna away and up the stairs to one of the bedrooms they had occupied when they had first moved to Peterhead. Once inside one of the rooms, John closed the door before Anna began to speak.

'John, you are not seriously considering we move to California?' Anna exclaimed, walking towards him.

'Vera will ruin us, Anna.' John countered her argument, taking hold of her hands in his, his voice desperate. ' We can't stay here now. For all we know she's already found us and is plotting her next move. Who knows what they'll say about you and our daughters names will be dragged through the mud.'

'I don't want to bring up the girls abroad.' Anna replied. 'It will be unsettling for them.'

'And having their parents ridiculed every time they step out of their front door won't be?'

'I'm sorry John, I can't do it.'

John turned on his heel, let out an exasperated sigh before pacing to the window. He remained silent for a few moments, thinking what they could do next. America seemed the only option but Anna was dead against it. Then another idea came into his mind. One which broke his heart but would mean Anna's dignity would remain in tact.

'Leave without me,' he uttered, squeezing his eyes shut as the words left his mouth.

'What... what do you mean leave without you?'

'We have enough money for you and the girls to set up a new life. Move back to Yorkshire if you want to. I can deal with Vera and the havoc she will no doubt cause, but you and the girls will be long gone. Say you are a war widow.'

'Are you serious?'

John turned to face Anna. He nodded weakly. 'I'll go to America with Jack; then when all this has blown over maybe we can find a way to be together...'

'This is absurd,' Anna stepped towards John, resting a hand on his cheek. 'I need you, the girls need their Daddy.'

'Don't you understand how much it will destroy me to hear the things people will say about the three of you? I don't care what they say about me, for all I care I deserve it, but you and our daughters don't. You three are the most wonderful, perfect beings to ever walk the face of the earth. I never knew it was possible to love anything as much as I do my three beautiful girls. You are the centre of my universe, it's my job to protect you. I'll not have you tainted by your association with me.'

Anna was openly sobbing now, hearing John talking about himself in that manner breaking her heart. She clutched the lapels of his waistcoat in her fists, John also beginning to cry as Anna tried to find the words to respond.

'Now you listen to me, John Bates. Don't you understand it will destroy me to be apart from you? Ever since the first moment I laid eyes on you I knew I'd never feel complete again unless you were by my side. On so many lonely nights I'd cry myself to sleep, just longing to feel your arms around me. Being apart from you now simply isn't an option. The girls need you. I need you. And if we don't stay here together and face the consequences, then I guess we're moving to California.'

'Do you mean it?' John breathed, leaning his forehead against Anna's.

'My life without you just doesn't bear thinking about. Do you remember what you said to me? That night you gave me my ring? By each other's side, till death us do part. That iss the only thing I will ever let come between us, John. If the Lord takes one of us. And even then I'll take him on as well.'

John laughed at Anna's words before capturing her lips in a sweet kiss. Pulling away, John held her tight in his embrace.

' I don't deserve you.'

'Sssh.' Anna hushed him. 'We best start making plans with Jack.'

* * *

Walking into the tea rooms. Anna was aware she and John hadn't been seen out and about for a couple of days. Vera hadn't made an appearance yet. She was grateful for that. She and John had packed enough for them and the girls to settle in in California, the rest would have to be bought when they arrived. The house was fully furnished with four bedrooms. John's position would pay well enough for Anna not to have to pick up some work. The house came with the job and the girls would be growing up in the sunshine. There were reasons to be positive. To feel blessed.

But they had built a happy life in Peterhead, Anna felt honoured to be part of such a wonderful community. But her most important role was a mother to her daughters and John's partner. Watching the three of them together was when she was at her most happiest. She would live on the moon so long as she had the three of them with her.

Ever since they had received the telegram, Anna had been on tenterhooks. Why couldn't the blasted woman just accept John didn't want her anymore? It made her feel sick to her stomach that Vera had experienced John in the same way she had, she had known him like Anna did now. John would always tell Anna, reassure her that he had never been in love with Vera, Anna was the only woman he had ever loved. But still, a small part of Anna questioned why John married her in the first place. Still, she was a strong believer everything happened for a reason, and John wouldn't be the man he was if it wasn't for everything he had experienced, the man she had fallen in love with.

'Anna, there you are.' Emily appeared from the back room, a smile on her face. 'Is everything alright?'

'I was wondering if I might have a word? With you and your mother.'

'Of course,' Agnes answered, appearing behind her daughter. 'I'll just send the other girls home then we are all yours.' Agnes smiled warmly. 'Wait at a table for us.'

She and John had decided they would tell who they considered close friends the whole story, and now was the time to reveal all to Agnes and Emily. They would be leaving with Jack in a couple of days, and Anna felt she owed it to the two women to tell them everything. Anna made polite conversation with her former colleagues as they left whilst Agnes and Emily finished their jobs. Waiting patiently for a few minutes, Anna looked up to see Emily approach her table with a tray of tea whilst Agnes locked the front door.

'Now, where have you been?' Agnes asked in her strong Scottish brogue, joining Anna and Emily at the table.

'I have something to tell you both, and it's not going to be easy.' Anna's voice was breaking as she spoke, Agnes looking on in concern as Emily immediately put down the pot of tea. 'You see, me and John, and the girls. Well, we have to leave Scotland.'

'To go where? Back to Yorkshire?' Emily asked. 'That's not too far.'

'No,' Anna interrupted, wiping a stray tear from her eye. This was proving to be more difficult than she had anticipated. 'We are moving to California.'

'America?' Agnes exclaimed. 'Why do you have to go that far?'

Taking a deep breath, Anna made eye contact with Emily, then Agnes before closing her eyes. 'To cut a long story short, mine and John's whole life up here has been based on a lie. Our relationship isn't a lie, we love each other deeply, it's just that.' Anna faltered, her sobs making it difficult to continue for a moment. 'It's just.'

'It's alright love,' Agnes placed a wrapped her fingers around Anna's gloved hand. 'Just say what you need to.'

Opening her eyes, Anna nodded before smiling weakly. 'Myself and John aren't really married, and his wife, Vera is on her way up here to reveal our secret.'

'I... I don't understand,' Emily looked on in confusion. 'If John is already married, why did he move here with you?'

Anna realised she had to tell the story from the beginning. How she met John, everything. She was glad that Agnes hadn't relinquished her grip on her hand, it sent a rush of relief through her body, it felt comforting as did the understanding expression on her face.

'Myself and John met when we worked together at Downton Abbey. John was Lord Grantham's valet, I was a housemaid.'

'So that was who the posh couple were at the christening?' Agnes remarked.

Anna nodded. 'John was Lord Grantham's batman during the Boer War. John doesn't speak about it much but from what I can gather, John saved Lord Grantham's life. That is why John walks with a cane, he has some shrapnel remaining in his knee.'

'Blimey. You learn something new everyday,' Emily raised her eyebrows before pouring everyone a cup of tea.

'Anyway, John arrived at Downton to be His Lordships new valet, the day we learnt the Titanic had sunk. I knew I loved him from the first moment I saw him, but he was always holding something back. We both admitted in the next couple of years we loved each other, but then I discovered his secret. He was married, things had taken a turn for the worse so he left to move to Downton. He had no idea where his wife was.'

'So he lead you on?' Agnes asked before taking a sip of her tea.

'No, it's wasn't like that,' Anna shook her head. 'He was always honest with me, told me he wasn't a free man but I loved him, and if I could only know him as a friend then so be it.'

Emily began to help herself to a biscuit from the tray, the look of confusion still evident on her face. 'How did it get to the two of you moving up here?'

'John's mum died, and Vera turned up at the funeral. It changed everything. John knew where she was and thought, with a little bit of coaxing, he could get the divorce he so desperately wanted from Vera. But then she got wind of the money his mother left him and blackmailed John to go back to London with her. But not before John had proposed to me.'

'He proposed to you, whilst he was still married?' Agnes raised her eyebrows.

'Yes, but then he was going to leave. Vera had some story to tell that would ruin Lord Grantham's family and the only way she would keep quiet was if John left with her. In the courtyard, whilst John was telling me this, I begged him not to leave me. Thankfully he relented, and here we are.'

'Here you are indeed.' Agnes took another sip of her tea.

'I know we aren't really married, in the eyes of the law I am his mistress, our daughters were born out of wedlock. But even you must see we belong together, how much we love each other. Honestly, I would die without him, God knows my life wouldn't be worth living. We are moving to California to protect our children. To protect the life we have worked so hard to build together.'

Silence fell then as what had just been revealed was processed by the two women. It felt like an eternity as Anna waited for them to say something, although she felt strangely relieved to have everything out in the open.

'Good on you, I say,' Emily finally said, a smile on her face. 'It's clear this Vera is a horrible woman out for what she can get.'

'Thank you,' Anna replied before looking at Agnes.

'You need to do what's right for those bairns, and if moving away from here is right then so be it. I can't say I wholeheartedly agree with the situation, but it's clear you and John share an unbreakable love, even if it isn't one shared in marriage. But I am not going to judge you Anna. Times are changing, we need to find our happiness where we can.'

'You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear you say those words.'

'Just make sure you write,' Agnes said with a slight smile, patting Anna's hand. 'And send us a photograph of those wee girls as they grow up.'

'I think I can manage that. I owe you both so much, I can count my true friends on one hand, but the both of you are definitely included.'

* * *

John and Anna sat in front of the fire, suitcases lined up in the corner of the room, the girls sleeping soundly upstairs. Anna was wrapped in John's arms, listening to the beat of his heart as she rested her head on his chest.

'What are you thinking?' John murmured before kissing Anna's hair.

'I'm thinking how amusing it is a recovering alcoholic is going to be managing a vineyard.'

Letting out a throaty laugh, Anna joined John with her own laughter. 'Yes, I hadn't thought of that.'

'Who would have thought it, though?' Anna sat up to look John in the eye. 'When we first met all those years ago. We'd end up moving with our two little girls to California?'

'Are you sure it's what you want?' John asked, meeting her gaze. 'Because we can sort something else out.'

'What, me be a war widow you mean? I don't think so. If we're leaving, we leave together.'

Pressing his lips to Anna's, John tried to show in his kiss how much it meant to him to hear Anna say those words, to remind her how much he loved her. Pulling away, Anna settled against his chest once again.

'I sent a letter to Mrs Hughes, explaining and gave her our new address. I also asked that she destroy all correspondence from me after reading.'

'I'm just very confused. Where is Vera? You'd have thought if she'd known of our whereabouts she'd have been here by now.'

'All I know is I don't want to take the risk. Even though everyone we care about knows the truth now. I've become accustomed to the idea of us moving away.'

'Me too,' John agreed. 'I've always been looking over my shoulder if I'm honest. It's always been a train journey keeping us away from her. Now it will be the Atlantic Ocean.'

'And a week long sail across it as well.' Anna added.

'But not before a train journey to Liverpool.' John also pointed out.

'Then a ferry across to Belfast.'

'With two nine month old girls.' John winced before they both fell into laughter once again. 'Maybe they can become accustomed with their second cousin Jack for some of the trip.'

'I think that is a fine idea, Mr Bates.' Anna agreed before adding a suggestion of her own. 'How about we make use of that bedroom once more? It's been the venue for so many memorable nights, I'm sure one more won't hurt.'

'Another fine idea, lead the way my love.'

* * *

George pulled the luggage out from the back of his van, setting each suitcase down on the pavement beside where he had parked outside Aberdeen train station. Jack and John had a twin each as Anna made sure she had everything.

'I'll go and get out tickets,' Jack said, taking Ella with him.

'Thank you so much,' John began, shaking George's hand. 'For everything, you really are the finest man I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. I'm so grateful to call you my cousin.'

'I've loved every minute of having the two of yee in Peterhead.' George replied, stroking Lily on the cheek. 'Just make sure you keep in contact.'

'Of course,' Anna replied, leaning up to kiss him on the cheek. 'When we needed someone you were our saviour. I will never forget it was you who enabled me to build a life with the man I love.'

'Are we ready?' Jack asked, placing Ella in the pushchair George had pulled out of the van before John did the same with Lily. 'Our train leaves platform two in ten minutes.'

'You best get going. I wish you both the very best.'

'You too, George,' Anna murmured, a tear falling down her cheek as he got back into his van. The three of them stopped and watched him drive away before disappearing into the traffic.

'Right then,' Jack exclaimed, picking up two suitcases. 'Lets go to America.'

He lead the way, Anna pushing the pushchair as John followed behind, cane balanced on his wrist and the two remaining suitcases in his hands.

'Anna,' John called. She stopped to look behind her. She felt as though her knees might buckle underneath her as she took in the beautiful smile he was now wearing. 'I do love you.'

She smiled, laughing slightly before nodding. 'I do believe I love you too. Now come on or we will miss our train.'

* * *

Looking up at the sign over the door, she smirked to herself. The name George Bates in bold letters. Landlord. This was the place. She pushed open the door, wearing her now uniformed snarl as she approached the bar.

'Where's the landlord?' She asked in her thick, Irish accent.

'That's me,' George replied, turning around, glass and cleaning cloth in hand. 'May I ask who is asking?'

'Come now, we are practically family. My name is Vera. I believe you know my husband, John, very well.'

By now, the conversation had caught Agnes's attention as she sat at the table beside the bar. George looked to her before turning his head to look at the woman once more.

'John who?' He asked, shrugging his shoulders.

'John Bates,' Vera replied, her patience wearing thin. 'Your cousin.'

'I don't have a cousin by the name of John.' George shook his head. 'I do have a cousin Jack. And Scott. And Catherine. But no John.'

'There's never been anyone by the name of John Bates around these parts,' Agnes added, before looking at the table next to her where Peter from the Post Office and some of the girls from the bakery were sat. 'Has there?'

Everyone else shook their heads. Vera slammed her fist on the bar. 'Your lying to me.' She growled.

'I think you have been misinformed, my darling,' George said, a patronising lilt to his tone. 'Now, can I pour you a drink?'

* * *

**A/N- Aww, poor Vera. Not. The next chapter shall be the last for this story. **


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N- The last chapter. Lots of fluff and a happy ending. Thanks to anyone who has left a review, and I apologise for my appalling geographical error in the previous chapter. It was never my strong point at school. **

**Disclaimer-** Downton belongs to ITV/Carnival/Lord Fellowes.

* * *

Sitting on the beach, Anna looked out over the waves racing to the shore as her two girls played contentedly beside her. Both clutched a brand new rag doll, a gift from their father as today was the twins first birthday. She smiled as they happily conversed in their own little language, words like Mama, Dada and each others names clearly audible every so often. Then the unmistakable cry of 'Dada' left Ella's lips, pointing beyond Anna to the top of the beach, near to their house.

Looking back over her shoulder, Anna's felt her heart skip a beat as she took in the sight before her. John was striding towards them on the soft sand, barefoot, hands in pockets having left his cane at home. He was wearing the light grey suit Anna had almost pleaded with him to buy for his new job, so tired of seeing him wearing black or brown. However, the jacket had been forgotten, as were his collar and tie leaving just the waistcoat and trousers. His sleeves were rolled up, the sight of his strong forearms still affecting Anna in ways she couldn't describe. The sunshine agreed with John, his skin had turned a light shade of brown since they had moved to California. He rarely wore his jacket, and cufflinks were soon obsolete as the heat of the Californian sun made wearing anything more than rolled up shirt sleeves unbearable.

'I thought I'd find you down here,' John said as he reached Anna. He knelt down, Anna meeting his lips in a soft kiss before the pleas of 'Dada' from Ella became to much. He scooped her up with his left arm, then picked Lily up too in his right with practiced ease. 'I see the dolls went down well.'

'They haven't let them out of their sight all morning,' Anna replied as John moved to sit beside Anna, still clasping both the girls in his arms. After placing a kiss on each of their heads, covered in soft blonde curls, Lily wriggled free, she was very much showing the independent streak that had drawn John so magnetically to Anna when they had first met. Ella, however, was much happier to sit on her father's knee, resting her head against his shoulder she fiddled with the hair on her doll between her thumb and index finger.

Lily, even though just a year old, was already starting to attempt to walk, causing a few heart stopping moments for her parents. She had been one step ahead of her sister in terms of physical development, yet it was Ella who had said Mama and Dada first. John had never known pride and a sense of love like it when she heard the word Dada fall from both of his daughters lips, particularly the first time it was said directly to him. They had been in America for a couple of weeks. John was in the garden with Ella, Anna bringing Lily inside to be changed. Ella was babbling happily, John replying to her baby chatter enthusiastically when she suddenly looked up at him. The word escaped her, and it was all John could do to hold himself together. It was a beautiful moment and one John would cherish until his dying day.

'It's lovely for you to join us,' Anna said, watching carefully as Lily adventured a little further away from them both. 'But what are you doing here? I thought you had a busy day at the vineyard?'

'We did, but Jack knew it was the girls birthday and knew how much I would like to spend it with them. So he has given me the rest of the day off.'

'I see.' Anna replied with a smile.

'I can go back if you want...'

'No,' Anna slipped her arm through John's. 'Stay right here.'

'Well, I was hoping we could go back to the house. I've bought a cake for the girls, and Jack has delivered a little surprise for them both.'

'I could go for cake,' Anna remarked, a pang of hunger washing through her. 'I'm feeling a little better this morning.'

'I'm glad,' John pressed his lips against Anna's temple. 'Shall we make a move then?'

Anna hadn't been feeling well for a while, sickness and dizziness plaguing her pretty much since they had arrived in California, just a couple of months previously. At first she thought she might be pregnant, but the doctor soon dismissed that. She was told it was a cause of her difficulty to acclimatise, although after initial reservations she had learnt to make do. California was beautiful, and the fact they were now thousands of miles away from Vera meant for the first time in her life, she felt as if John truly belonged to her. It would be a lie if Anna said she wasn't missing home. She was, and if John said the word she would move back there in a heartbeat. But this was what he wanted to do for them to be together, and she was happy to be by his side.

She hadn't been wearing her wedding ring in America, the lie they had been living although a happy one, was no longer needed. No one batted an eye lid when they said they weren't married. Where they were now situated was the land of movie stars, any scandals Anna and John may create were considered small in comparison to those of Hollywood. John kept the ring safe however, reassuring Anna when she handed it to him that one day it would be hers. Properly. John then joked even if it meant they were both in their dotage and Anna had to push him up the aisle in a wheelchair.

John had taken to his task of Vineyard manager with an ease that surprised them both. It was his job to ensure the demand for Jack's wine was met, and that those employed carried out their tasks correctly. Jack was able to take a step back, often attending meetings held by those protesting in favour of prohibition. The protests were still in their early stages, although if the laws were eventually passed it would mean vineyards would be closed down, throughout America. This would mean Jack's livelihood would be lost. However, John wasn't worried. It was a Bates trait to be shrewd with money, and should the worse happen Jack had enough in reserve to get back on his feet.

Back home, the three ladies of the house quickly devoured half of the cake, the girls both obviously inheriting their mother's sweet tooth. John sat back and watched Anna with the girls. Anna was a natural mother, and it warmed his heart to see how much they both adored her. When it came down to it, if John could see this vision before him every day, his Anna and their girls together, he didn't need anything else. Everything he had ever desired was sitting beside him at his table in the kitchen of the house he shared with the love of his life. He felt very lucky indeed.

A knock at the door brought him out of his silent reverie, Anna rising to answer before John gently encouraged her to sit back down with just a look and a smile on his face. She obliged, and happily sank back into a conversation of sorts with the twins as John walked to the door. Standing there was the postman. He handed John a white envelope.

'A letter came through for you sir. From England.' the man explained. John took the envelope. 'Have a nice day, sir.'

John nodded in acknowledgement, watching the man walk away. Walking back through to the kitchen, Anna looked back at him. 'Who was that?'

'It's a letter,' John replied, joining Anna at the table once more.

'Well, open it,' Anna said. 'No point in staring at it.'

'But it's from England.' John replied. 'What if it's from...'

'Just open it.' Anna reiterated.

Exhaling deeply, John began to work the paper free from it's envelope. With shaky fingers, he unfolded it and began to read. He sat in silence, Anna watching his eyes dart back and forth as he read, hoping to gauge some sort of reaction. When none came, the anticipation was too much.

'What does it say, John?'

'It's Vera,' John said weakly.

'I knew it. I just knew it.' Anna rose from the table, gathering the plates she and the girls had used and walked to the sink. 'She's found us here and she's going to come over here and...'

'No. It's not from Vera, it's about her,' John interrupted, Anna immediately ending her ranting. 'The letter is from His Lordship. Sir Richard Carlisle, Mary's intended, had discovered some news. Vera was killed in a traffic accident in Dublin.'

Anna turned to look at John, she could barely believe what she was hearing. 'I'm sorry?'

'It happened a month or so after we left. Vera's dead.'

With those words, John left the letter on the table, rising to his feet and leaving the kitchen through the back door that lead out into the garden. Anna watched as he paced the lawn, hands in his pockets. He looked in complete shock. She didn't know how to feel. Although it was tragic, wasn't this in a funny way welcome news? She shook the notion from her head immediately, what a dreadful thought. Anna had never wished that on anybody and she wasn't about to start now, no matter how much she detested Vera. Deciding to leave John to his own devices for a while, she lifted the girls and took them upstairs to put them down for their afternoon nap.

* * *

Sitting in his office at the vineyard, John stared straight ahead completely lost in thought. It had been a few days since they had received the news about Vera, and John wasn't sure how to take it. He was surprised to be feeling a little guilty about how things had materialised. He would never regret his life with Anna, his guilt lay with how his marriage had turned sour after he had returned from the war. To start with, Vera was supportive but he dismissed her efforts, preferring to find solace at the bottom of a whisky bottle. He said some hurtful things that made him extremely ashamed now. Maybe that was the reason why Vera turned bitter towards him. How he could have ever uttered such dreadful things to a woman was beyond him, especially one that seemed to genuinely care and wanted to help.

Suddenly, the door swung open and Jack bounded in, a case of wine under his arm. 'Alright, Johnny boy. This has got to stop.'

'What has?' John asked, looking up at his cousin with a vacant expression.

'I just saw your lovely Anna pushing the girls in the local promenade. She's worried sick about you.'

'And I've told her not to worry. I'm fine.'

Jack raised his eyebrows at John before pushing the office door closed. 'Don't give me that. You are not. What is it?'

'Nothing...'

'John,' Jack exclaimed in frustration. 'Are you really upset about Vera? She caused you nothing but misery.'

Giving in, John sighed before calculating his response. 'Not upset as such. Guilty, but not upset.'

'What the hell have you got to feel guilty about?'

'I was awful to her when I returned from the Boers,' John replied with a whisper, staring down at his desk. 'A complete bastard.'

Jack moved to sit on the edge of the desk, next to where John sat in his chair. 'From what I can gather John, she was a complete bitch to you for the entirety of your marriage. How long after she became Mrs Bates did she have it away with another man?'

The cousins who had known each other for over thirty five years found it easy to speak this candidly when alone. John would never dream of using such words when in anyone else's company, not even Anna's. The only time his use of language would slightly drift into a manner not befitting a gentleman was in the latter stages of their lovemaking. John had surprised himself the first time, the way Anna was making him feel as she wrapped her legs around his hips rendering him not in control of his own actions. The words escaped him, and despite initially moving Anna into silence, he was urged on when she finally responded in kind, the words emanating from her exciting him more then he had ever been before.

'From what I can garner from what you've said, she had affair after affair even before you went to the Boer's. The marriage was doomed from the start, even before your injury. The way you treated her when you returned was just your way of displaying how her constant betrayal had left you feeling.'

He was right. Vera hadn't been faithful from the start. 'I guess it's just hard to believe she's really gone.'

'Well she has,' Jack replied, standing up. 'What I find hard to believe is that one major fact, something that should be of utmost importance to you on hearing this news, you have completely overlooked.'

'What's that?'

'You and Anna are free to marry.' John stared back at him in silence as he processed Jack's words. 'Look, I have another of these prohibition meetings to attend. I'll see you later. But think on this. Don't waste your time thinking about a woman who nearly destroyed your life, when the one who is the love of it is waiting, deeply concerned for you at home.'

* * *

It had been late when Anna had finally taken the girls up to bed. She had been waiting for John to come home, the clock gently moving past eight and he still hadn't arrived. Admitting defeat, she carried them both upstairs and was relieved when they both fell into slumber quickly. Anna hadn't been feeling well again, and decided on having a bath then retiring herself. Now dried, dressed for a night of sleep and feeling a little refreshed, she set about making a cup of tea, deciding to give John another half an hour before she would take herself up to bed. The sound of the door opening was music to Anna's ears as she turned to look at the kitchen doorway. John appeared, a bottle of wine under his arm. His hair was dishevelled, a lock escaping over his right eye. He was smiling, and it took Anna's breath away. She looked away, concentrating on her task or preparing a tea tray once more waiting for John to break the silence.

'Marry me.'

Whatever she had expected him to say, it hadn't been that as she rose her head once more to catch his gaze. 'I'm... I'm sorry?'

'Marry me,' he repeated himself.

She hadn't misheard. 'What's brought this on? You haven't said so much as two words to me since we got that letter.'

'I know,' John said, moving towards Anna and into the kitchen. 'I've been a damned fool. I didn't know how to take the news, and all the time I was thinking about my failed marriage I was forgetting about the most important thing that ever happened to me. You.'

'Look, just because Vera is out of the picture now, you needn't feel like you have to ask me. When we left for Peterhead we were desperate, we needed to do anything to...'

He silenced her by crushing his lips against hers, wrapping his arms tightly around her waist. Pulling away, both were breathless as they rested their foreheads against one another's. John gently stroked her cheek before beginning to speak.

'I've wanted you to be my wife since the first moment I saw you, and I mean that. It was that instant. I knew I loved you and wanted you by my side for the rest of my life the moment you offered me your hand in the corridor outside the servants hall. Even pretending to be married, knowing you the way a man should know his wife, there was always something missing. Although you had told me with words and showed me with your actions, gave birth to my children, you were never completely mine. I pushed it to the back of my mind, it would have driven me crazy if I didn't.'

'John, I am yours. Please don't think any different.'

'I'm sorry Anna, but I couldn't help it. This afternoon, I realised, or rather Jack made me realise, that we could finally be together. Properly. It's made me physically ache to not see that ring on your finger, lie or not. I can't bear it any longer. Please marry me Anna, be my wife.'

She couldn't speak, the emotion of the moment making formulating words an impossible task. Anna answered with a nod of the head as tears began to fall down her cheeks. John took her into his embrace, kissing her lightly on the top of the head. They had waited the best part of five years for this. And it had finally happened.

Anna and John were free to be together.

* * *

The next day at the vineyard, John was surprised to see Jack already hard at work, moving some cases into a larger crate ready for a delivery. He seemed perplexed, John could read that much as he wasn't exactly being gentle with his fragile cargo. As John reached him, Jack stopped and looked up at his cousin.

'Did you get things sorted out with Anna?'

'We're engaged.'

'Fantastic, because I need to speak to you in the office.'

'Sounds ominous.' John replied with a light chuckle.

'Just follow me.'

John did as he was instructed, following Jack to the office with a speed that he wasn't finding entirely comfortable, thanks to his knee. Once inside, John was thankful to be able to sit down behind his desk.

'Everything alright, Jack?'

'Not really,' Jack answered, pacing the floor as John made himself comfortable. 'This meeting, last night.'

'Yes, with the prohibition protesters.' John shrugged his shoulders as he organised some papers on the top of his desk. 'It's not really going to come to anything, is it?'

Jack's silence spoke volumes, causing John to look up. He met his cousins gaze, one filled with worry although a slight resignation. 'It's going to happen one day. And then this place will be pointless. I'm not prepared to stick around whilst they ruin me. I want to sell up, and move back home.'

John couldn't believe what he was hearing. 'But what about everything else? The workforce, the customers. Myself and Anna moved out here for you.'

'Hold your horses, Johnny.' Jack raised a hand to John, indicating for him to be quiet. 'You did always jump the gun. I wouldn't even be contemplating this if it meant you and Anna would have to return to living in the manner in which you were before I asked you over here. There is nothing stopping you returning home now. And I want you to. To manage the vineyard I shall be opening in Northumberland.'

'I'm sorry? Leave California when the girls have just got settled...'

'They're young,' Jack dismissed John's argument. 'This will seem like an extended holiday to them, they probably won't remember.'

'It's not just that, we'll need somewhere to live. To start all over again...'

'The job will come with a home, I have enough money to see to that. I just want to leave before I lose everything I have ever earned. It may be harsh on those lads working out there, but I am a businessman. And I am a family man. I would make sure you and Anna were set. Unless you both wanted to stay here.'

John thought for a moment. He knew Anna missed home. And Jack was right, nothing was stopping them from returning now. A slight smile spread over his lips.

'This vineyard in Northumberland...'

'George is overseeing the construction and setting up, it will be ready in three weeks.'

'I'll have to talk to Anna.'

'Have the rest of the day to do so. I insist.'

* * *

Two short weeks later, John and his family were on the move back to England. Anna had fallen into John's arms when he had revealed Jack's news. John felt guilty as Anna admitted she had longed for John to utter the words they were to return home. She had been finding life lonely, with no one to talk to but the girls the entire day. As he voiced his apologies, Anna said with complete sincerity she would do it all over again. So long as she could be with him. Anna did however have one request of John. That before they moved to Northumberland, they married near Downton, so those they loved could be present. It wasn't too far for George, Agnes and Emily to travel down either. How could he refuse her?

Once in Yorkshire, Jack returned to Peterhead to make arrangements for the Scottish guests to meet with John and Anna for the wedding. After taking out a special licence, the date had been set for a week after they had arrived home. Jack had paid for the two of them and the twins to stay at the Grantham Arms, until after they were married.

It was Mrs Hughes who spotted them in the village. She couldn't believe her eyes, approaching them with open arms. After some coaxing, they were persuaded to come back to the house, to see some old friends. Anna's illness was still prominent, she needing to be tended to by Mrs Hughes in her sitting room whilst they were visiting. As John showed off his girls to the other's in the servants hall, Anna was confiding in Mrs Hughes. She admitted to an old confidante that the only other time she had been feeling this way was when she was pregnant with the twins. Mrs Hughes convinced Anna to see Doctor Clarkson, she would be visiting him this afternoon for a routine check up as it was.

Back in the servants hall, Daisy was bouncing Ella on her knee as Anna appeared. She announced she was walking into the village with Mrs Hughes. Just as she had informed John of her intentions, His Lordship appeared at the door.

'Bates, my dear fellow.'

'My Lord,' John immediately stood, following suit of those around him, Lily clutching tightly to h.

'I believe congratulations are in order. It's wonderful news that you and Anna will finally be married. Would it be agreeable for the four of you to join myself and Her Ladyship?'

'I would be very honoured my lord, but Anna accompanying Mrs Hughes into the village.'

'Well, how about this? You, me and your beautiful daughters go for a stroll in the garden, then when Anna returns you can both join myself and Lady Grantham for afternoon tea.'

John looked to Anna, who was nodding. 'That would be very kind, my Lord.'

'We shall be honoured to host a reception in your honour after the wedding,' Lady Cora insisted as she and her husband bid farewell to John, Anna and the girls at the front of the house. Anna and John were touched as the staff were present to say goodbye as well.

'Then we shall be honoured to accept,' John replied, smiling down at Anna. 'Wouldn't we, my darling.'

'Yes,' Anna smiled at Lady Cora, before looking to Lady Mary. 'We would.'

After saying their farewells, John and Anna continued on their way to the Grantham Arms. They walked in silence, Anna pushing the pushchair. John could tell something was on Anna's mind. He would look down at her intermittently, he could tell by her eyes she was deep in thought.

'How was the trip into the village?' John said finally. 'See any old faces?'

Looking up at him, John was surprised to see a smile spread across Anna's lips. 'I did, as it happens. Doctor Clarkson for one.'

'Oh right.' John said, looking straight ahead again as they continued to walk. 'Talk about anything worthy of note?'

'Something that might peak your interest, yes.' Anna responded with a slight lilt to her tone. John's eyes were on her in a heartbeat. 'You know how I've been poorly recently.'

'Yes, the doctor in America said it was due to the climate.'

'Well, it wasn't. And he was wrong. Very wrong.' They stopped walking for a moment, John's eyes never leaving Anna as she almost couldn't contain her excitement. 'I'm pregnant, John.'

'Pregnant? But the doctor in America was adamant...'

'And the doctor in America was mistaken. I could feel he was but didn't want to question him. In a funny way I wanted to believe him, the timing is all wrong. It's only since we've been home, in familiar surroundings that I have forced myself to accept it.'

'So you must be quite far along...'

'Four months,' Anna interrupted before adding with a small laugh, 'it must only be one this time. I am hardly showing.'

'Thank goodness for that,' John replied with a laugh of his own. 'And when you say about the timing, you couldn't be more wrong. Any time you tell me we are bringing another child into the world is the perfect time.'

'Are you sure? You're happy?'

John took Anna's hands in his. 'My darling, I am thrilled. I love you so much.'

'I love you too.'

* * *

John ran his finger over the band that now sat on Anna's ring finger, this time placed there as they exchanged their vows in front of everyone they loved and cherished. It had taken John's breath away to see her approach him outside the registry office, resplendent in a simple white dress and flowers in her hair. Agnes and Emily looked after the girls as John and Anna promised their lives to each other, this time for real. Now, standing together back at the big house, John had been encouraged to say a few words. He and Anna had decided to reveal their news as he recited his speech, and she stood with him as he began to speak. Carson tried to gain the attention of those gathered.

'Ladies and Gentleman, please be upstanding, for a word from the groom.'

A round of applause rippled through the grand ballroom at Downton. John squeezed Anna's hand before beginning his speech.

'It's wonderful to see so many of our friends and family here today. People who have been supportive to me and Anna, especially in the past couple of years.'

Anna raised her eyebrows as she spied Thomas at the back of the room, smirking. She then turned her attentions to Agnes, Emily and George who were, between them, battling to keep Ella and Lily content with the help of Mrs Hughes.

'It feels wonderful to be standing here, holding Anna's hand safe in the knowledge that she is my wife. It hasn't been ideal, but I don't have a single regret in the way in which things progressed. I was with the woman I loved and that was all that mattered to me. And, how could I regret it when, in the time we spent in Scotland we brought those two beautiful little girls into the world? ' John looked at his daughters, both staring at him intently. 'The circumstances in which they were born may have been frowned upon, but how could something so perfect be wrong?'

'It wasn't wrong,' Jack interrupted from the side of the room, drawing attention from others. 'Anyone who looks at the two of you can see you are made for each other. Any child with parents who share a bond as strong as yours are fortunate indeed.'

John nodded in acknowledgement to his cousins words, before looking down at Anna. 'Which leads me on to a small piece of news that myself and Anna would like to share. My wife and I are expecting our third child.'

'Blimey, they have been living in sin,' Thomas said under his breath to an impressionable footman, within ear shot of Mr Carson.

'Thomas,' he said sternly under his breath.

John raised a glass. 'I'd like you join me in a toast. To my wife, and our new life together.'

As everyone applauded, John and Anna shared a brief kiss before John whispered in her ear. 'Thank you.'

'For what?'

'Everything. Agreeing to be my wife, Ella and Lily, the new little one.'

'Well, it was a pleasure,' Anna replied, tongue firmly in cheek. 'But I believe I am the one who should be thanking you, Mr Bates.'

'What on earth for, Mrs Bates?'

Anna giggled at his manner of address before continuing. 'Well, if you hadn't stayed when I begged you in the courtyard, none of this would have happened. It just doesn't bear thinking about, my life without you.'

'Well in that case, it was my pleasure.' John placed a strong arm around Anna's waist. 'Although we've exchanged vows, I don't want you to forget what I said to you that first night in Scotland.'

'And what was that?'

'You can't have forgotten,' John said with a roll of his eyes. 'Surely?'

'Maybe not, but I'd love you to remind me.'

In the next moment, John had pulled Anna tightly into his embrace, present company and their eyes on the newlyweds be damned. He moved to whisper in her ear once again.

'My heart has been yours since the first time I saw you. Nothing in this world will ever seem that terrible again, because I shall be safe in the knowledge that you are , by my side till death do us part.'


End file.
